IMAO
A Brief History of Canada

At the dawn of our new nation, there were still some who wished to be loyal to the crumpet eating British and wanted to pronounce "about" so that it rhymes with "boot." And there was much kung fu fighting. In the end, we banished all those who were too big of a loser to be a part of our kick ass country to the barren lands of Canada where they would surely die either from the cold or by being eaten by the meese. Unfortunately, they somehow survived, and many became hilarious comedians. The best ones moved here, still leaving the lands of Canada populated by those too big of a reject to be Americans. They have since settled into their role as "America-lite," the margarine to the butter that is America. They claim "You can't believe it's not America, eh" but your senses would have to be dead to fall for it. Still, we felt sorry for them and let them build the robot arm for the space shuttle so they could feel useful. They have done nothing of note since.