Liberals: Can They Do Anything Right?

Judging by this video, the answer is “no”.

[Hat tip: Xaetognath]

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Currently Unable to Fit Fat Head Through Doorways

This post is strictly an exercise in egotism for me, but that’s what blogging is all about, right? So I’m taking this opportunity to point out that Jeri Thompson called me “brilliant” during the 4-14 Fred Thompson Show [47:10].

[15 second mp3]

Sadly, though, I now have only 14 minutes and 45 seconds of fame left to me. I should try not to squander it all in one place.

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Award!

Georgeguy of The Prophet of Neofederalism has honored IMAO with the “Institute of Legitimate Wisdom Independence for Individuals Grandiosity Prize 2009” Award:

I don’t understand all those big words, but I’m assuming they mean that IMAO is extra-super-cool!


FINE PRINT:

To join the exclusive club of blogs who honor IMAO and have your award featured on our sidebar with a link to your blog, make up a fancy award image honoring IMAO, blog about it, and drop a link in the comments.

Keep it PG-13, and if it doesn’t suck too terribly bad, your award will be duly noted in a post (which may take a while if participation is heavy, so be patient), and placed in the sidebar with a link to your site.

As added incentive for people to honor IMAO with worthless, made-up awards, those who do so may proudly display this worthless, made-up Participant Ribbon:

If you don’t have a blog, then send your image to harvolson-at-gmail.com and include a link to one of your favorite IMAO posts.

For the Photoshop-impaired, here’s a guide to making mediocre fake pictures with Microsoft Paint

Or try the free lolbuilder from I Can Has Cheezburger.

IMPORTANT NOTE: Maximum sidebar image width is 190 pixels. Please make sure text is at least barely legible at that size.

Now get honoring!

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Efficient Government

We’re so used to wasteful government, it’s nice to see how efficient our snipers are. They had three targets to take out with the pirate incident, and how many bullets did they use to do it? Only three! Even if they had some horrible contract for those bullets and they cost $500 each, that still seems like a pretty good deal to rid the world of three pirates. Next time you see wasteful government, tell them to be more like snipers. Or at least kill pirates.

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Fake Plastic Cheers

In case you missed it, Jim Treacher reports on how all the troops cheering on Obama are actually plastic turkeys or something. Who is really so deluded as to think the military was overwhelmingly supported Obama. Yeah, they just love being told they’re failures by a prancing sissy.

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DHS and Right-Wing Extremism

I’ve been alerted by the Department of Homeland Security that there might be right-wing extremism at IMAO in either the comments and maybe even the posts. Now, I told them I don’t monitor this blog. At all. I don’t read any comments or posts from the other bloggers. And if they look at my lack of proofreading, it’s pretty obvious I don’t even red my own psots. Still, it concerns me that there could be extremism at my blog, so I want you all to keep an eye out for it. If any posters are acting suspiciously conservative and going on about how they like tax cuts or disparaging the Obama administration, report them immediately to the DHS. Politics is fun and all, but we should never make anyone uncomfortable with our views.

So back to plotting how to get dinosaurs with rocket launchers on them. I’m thinking the best way is to track down Dick Cheney and find how he got them for his Assassination Squad.

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Tea Party Day!

I’ve been paid thousands of dollars by mysterious right-wing entities to say I think that the Tea Parties are a great thing and I support them in a spontaneous fashion. I even got some Spiced Chai Tea to drink for the occasion. That’s what I’m supposed to do today, right? Drink tea? I guess I better consult the people pulling the strings the average tax-payer who has spontaneously decided to take to the streets.

I kinda feel like a bad conservative for not paying more attention to the tea parties, but it’s just that protesting is anathema to everything I am as a conservative. I’m one of those actual conservatives — the ones with a 9 to 5 — and I stand by my principle that being a conservative means you almost always have something more important to worry about than politics. Then again, a lot of conservatives don’t have jobs today and that’s a big part of the problem. And the giant check I had to write for taxes this year isn’t making me much happier about the billions being mindlessly spent on pork to help fight our enemy Eurasia or whatever excuse they gave us.

So, hopefully there will be a big impact. Fred and Jeri Thompson will be on PJTV later today to host some Tea Party coverage. Fred Thompson promises to explode a hippie head. Why? Because it’s tea party day!

So tell me what you’re up to today in the comments.

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Sensitive Coverage

“Media Having Trouble Finding Right Angle On Obama’s Double-Homicide”. You don’t want to sensationalize things.

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Twitter Updates for 2009-04-15

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