Comments on: Fun Facts About Britain – UPDATED 4-2-09

By: IMAO » Blog Archive » Leader of the Free World

IMAO » Blog Archive » Leader of the Free World — Sun, 15 Nov 2009 23:51:35 +0000

[...] Great Britain? They have a queen. A queen? A non-elected monarch? As leader of the Free World? Three down, two to go. [...]

By: rickee

rickee — Wed, 16 Sep 2009 04:18:23 +0000

i have not tried british food may be tasty i think

By: seanmahair

seanmahair — Sat, 04 Apr 2009 19:57:26 +0000

The only funny things about the UK are old Monty Python reruns and Charles (Jug Ears) Prince of Wails and his Rotweiller. Other than that it’s all pretty sad, depressing and derivative.

By: 5 of 7

5 of 7 — Fri, 03 Apr 2009 04:00:51 +0000

#10 – Son of Bob,
LOL, A+!

Cow becomes Beef.
Pig becomes Pork.
Sheep becomes Mutton.
Ducks and Chicken becomes Poultry.
Why?
Because after 1066AD, the Anglo-Saxons raised the animals,
but their Norman overlords got to eat them, and gave them frenchified names.

(William the Conqueror was also known as William the B*st*rd, but not to his face!)

By: GeoD

GeoD — Fri, 03 Apr 2009 03:44:22 +0000

Rightjabs, I believe you’re thinking of “That’s as may be.” essentially a confusingly elongated form of “That may be.”

By: raml

raml — Fri, 03 Apr 2009 02:11:03 +0000

#9 Would Sandra Bollocks be offensive enough for you.

Nevermind

By: Teleprompter Messiah

Teleprompter Messiah — Fri, 03 Apr 2009 00:08:50 +0000

The only thing good out of Britain since Thatcher is Little Britain.

I don’t care who you are, that’s funny!

By: silaS marreD

silaS marreD — Thu, 02 Apr 2009 23:40:17 +0000

Nottingham is home to the smallest public cinema in the world. With only 22 seats, it has more than enough space for the screening of any Michael Moore documentary but not enough space for Michael Moore.

By: Harvey

Harvey — Thu, 02 Apr 2009 23:15:28 +0000

Ok, I confess, I’ve never actually had Marmite. It just creeps me out a little because it sounds like it might be made from marmots.

Which I’ve heard are saltier & chewier than Stalagmites.

By: midwestconservative

midwestconservative — Thu, 02 Apr 2009 22:58:23 +0000

When properly squeezed the average Brit will yield approximately six and one half litters of limey juice

By: Thor

Thor — Thu, 02 Apr 2009 22:21:32 +0000

Stalagmites are good. Saltier than stalagtites. Moister and chewier, as well. Just brush off the guano if ya’ get ‘em fresh.

By: Tommy the Towelhead

Tommy the Towelhead — Thu, 02 Apr 2009 22:11:37 +0000

James: ever tried Vegemite. It’s even better than Marmite.

By: NunyaB

NunyaB — Thu, 02 Apr 2009 22:00:31 +0000

5 star thread, thanks all! ‘Bout time we knocked them limeys down a peg.

However, I do feel genuinely sorry for all these world leaders getting such crappy dollar store and/or trendy gifts from Mr. messiah.

Oh, and “fag” over there is what Britons smoke. Over, here, it’s what Sen. Fwank is.

Mr. Bean, Torville & Dean (hey that rhymes), and Mr. Lucas from Are You Being Served? are the only things I need from the Mother Country.

By: James

James — Thu, 02 Apr 2009 21:35:32 +0000

What’s with all the hate on Marmite? You can get it at most grocery stores here in the states now, and it’s actually really good if you like onion-y salt-y stuff (and what kind of red-blooded American doesn’t?). Here’s the secret:

1.) Buy the bakery multigrain loaf bread Costco sells. You *do* buy everything in 30-pound tubs at Costco, right?
2.) Apply a thick smear of your butter / margarine of choice
3.) Apply a *thin* smear of Marmite over that. If you can’t see butter through it, you’re doing it wrong.

Now, enjoy, preferably with a stock-based (vice cream-based) soup or stew. Man, that’s good eats.

By: Tommy the Towelhead

Tommy the Towelhead — Thu, 02 Apr 2009 21:30:30 +0000

Strange. I thought we called France “Webbland” because of the green skin that grows between their fingers and toes. I guess that’s why a Frenchman’s arse is watertight.

By: Jimmy

Jimmy — Thu, 02 Apr 2009 21:20:09 +0000

Do. Not. Touch. The. Queen.

Back away from the Queen.

By: Plentyobailouts

Plentyobailouts — Thu, 02 Apr 2009 21:17:43 +0000

#12, So the pansifacation of europe started when good norse stock was able to be bribed by a retarded frenchman? So as early as the middle ages we knew the disease of liberalism was contageous, yet we still have no cure? Damn french fried Vikings.

By: Silicon Valley Jim

Silicon Valley Jim — Thu, 02 Apr 2009 21:00:38 +0000

Theatre Royal Bristol is the oldest continuously working theatre in Britain and has been staging “Cats” since 1766.

And “The Mouse Trap” since 1736, no doubt.

The British have many interestingly-named foods, including kedgeree, toad-in-the-hole, my aunt’s old socks, and toasted pond scum.

By: MarkoMancuso

MarkoMancuso — Thu, 02 Apr 2009 20:52:12 +0000

Not quite, #4, Plentyofbailouts. The Normans weren’t really French. They were Norse raiders who were given Normandy as a bribe by King Charles the Simple (Truly!) of France.

By: aA

aA — Thu, 02 Apr 2009 20:05:59 +0000

OMG, FUN FACTS are one of my favorite Harvey routines! Frank is so much better when he’s Harvey. I miss the podcasts with the Fun Facts *sinf*.

I need to be alone right now…

and I’ll need to review the archived Fun Facts…bless you, Harvey!

By: Son of Bob

Son of Bob — Thu, 02 Apr 2009 19:55:31 +0000

And, the word “queen” is very different, as well.

Over there, the queen is an old woman with too many iPods. While over here, it’s a gay Elmer Fudd that dates pimps and destroys people’s financial futures.

The British queen has a son with big ears, while the American queen does the bidding of a guy with big ears.

The British queen was clearly not very good at raising a child, while the American queen should probably just be kept away from children.

So, there really are quite a few differences.

By: Swamper

Swamper — Thu, 02 Apr 2009 18:58:00 +0000

They think that “bollocks” is a swear word. Come on, it doesn’t even sound offensive.

By: Rachel

Rachel — Thu, 02 Apr 2009 18:32:29 +0000

Please take Obama and his entourage back – the UK is bad enough with the Obamessiah thrown into the mix.

By: Jimmy

Jimmy — Thu, 02 Apr 2009 18:25:51 +0000

I’m a pushover for British humor. Wait… Harvey, are you British?

By: BillyRayBob

BillyRayBob — Thu, 02 Apr 2009 18:07:53 +0000

I learned all I need to know about the British from Austin Powers and Mary Poppins