Rarl Kove, G20 protocol advisor.

LONDON (APF) – German ­chancellor Angela Merkel and French president Nicolas Sarkozy walked out of the G-20 summit today after serious disagreements erupted in their first meeting with President Barack Obama discussing their proposed changes to the world financial system. Calling Mr. Obama “that uneducated baboon from North America” and “an ugly simian bag of mostly water,” the two European leaders met privately afterwards to decide their next steps at the summit. Later, they jointly apologized in an ad hoc statement, saying, “We meant to use the word: ‘buffoon.’ Sorry.”

“We’re not sitting down with some perpetually smiling auto industry wannabe,” said Sarkozy, who happens to think money grows on monkey trees. Under this new president, the United States has run up almost it’s annual GDP in debt! And he expects the rest of the world to be hoodwinked and bamboozled like this? I don’t think so.”

Merkle added, “If we adopt the US approach, Europe will soon be a bankrupt, third-world continent overrun by insurmountable debt, high taxes, shrinking industry and Sharia law.” When a US reporter pointed out that it already is, Merkle responded with “Oh, shut up. Eat my struddle. You vill like it.”

Many of the remaining G-20 participants were reportedly shocked at this development as they see Barack Obama as a breath of fresh air on the troubling international financial scene with his strutting good looks and lack of experience in economics. But some some were not so sure.

“Do we have high hopes for him and the US Dollar backed by the great printing presses of the US Federal Reserve? NYET!” remarked the Russian delegate sitting in for Russian President Dmitriy Medvedev who was in a meeting with China. They’re reportedly working on replacing the US Dollar as the world’s reserve currency and sending Mr. Obama home as the big loser of the summit.

When that one tries to dribble around sarcozee, I hope he fails.