House of Payne of House of Payne International has honored IMAO with the “The Mitt Romney Honorary Suspected Arsonist Award – presented to IMAO by House of Payne International” Award.

As much as we at IMAO enjoy playing with fire, we generally discourage the combustion of non-terrorist property. Yes, we know how compulsively entrancing those pretty, pretty flames are, just as we are familiar with the dark and secret longing for the near-erotic thrill of watching the magic embers fly to the heavens as the filthy earth below is cleansed and purified.

That’s why we live in America, where the National Anthem celebrates rockets and bombs, and children are encouraged to play with explosives every summer.

Although I think this year we’ll try setting fire to a pile of over-taxed tea bags. Napalm may smell like victory, but burning tea smells like independence.

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  1. Yeah, but what about Robert Byrd? He’s a democrat. And, he used to have a weakness for setting fire to crosses in people’s yards.


  2. The implication is that Romney travels around various burn sites pointing fingers at suspects. That is friggin’ hilarious. One is left with the question, “What else does he do?”

    Don’t get me wrong here, I like Mitt. I just wish his nads were bigger – and more conservative.


  3. That’s actually a picture from last month when my church burned. Mitt used to attend that very church, so he came by to survey the scene. And now I’ve mined my pain for comedy gold! Hooray!


  4. Jimmy, I’m gonna start giving more credence to ussjc’s innuendos about you given you fascination with Mitt’s nads. Just sayin’


  5. DE, innuendos – that isn’t ALL that ussjc is full of!! The poor guy vacillates (with vaseline?) between carrying refreshments for Obama, carrying his Teleprompter around and shooting wolves for Palin. Jeepers.

    Imagine, though, DE – stay with me on this one – a Mitt Romney with nads the size of Ronald Reagan’s. It (they?) would be splendiferous. (They’d be too big for his pants, however.)


  6. Jimmy,

    Though I agree with the last statement, did you have to gay it up so much? Heh.



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