Frank Advice for Life
You can really hurt your hand punching a dog in the face because of their big bony snouts. Only punch pugs.
(16 votes, average: 4.56 out of 5)
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August 31st, 2009 at 2:25 pm
….and Pekinese.
August 31st, 2009 at 2:29 pm
The fam will be getting a dog within the next 6 months, thank you for this public service Frank! Speaking of punching things in the face.
August 31st, 2009 at 2:39 pm
I’ll stick with punching hippies and commies it’s much more fun.
August 31st, 2009 at 2:56 pm
Dogs are man’s best friend…they require no punching.
Liberals, however, require regular punchings.
August 31st, 2009 at 2:59 pm
Punches aren’t for dogs.
Punches are blended.
Blenders are for puppies.
-Instapundit
August 31st, 2009 at 3:10 pm
Dogs will defend you to their deaths. Don’t punch or abuse them.
Cats however will bite, scratch, and otherwise maim you without hesitating.
August 31st, 2009 at 3:17 pm
Pugs: the combination/contraction of the name Pelosi, and the word thugs. Feel free to punch away. Leave the small dogs with the squooshed in face alone.
August 31st, 2009 at 3:22 pm
cjtony97
Guy must have one to a different Bible College than I did. I hope for policy failure not heart failure
August 31st, 2009 at 3:23 pm
oh and don’t punch a corgi they bite hard
August 31st, 2009 at 3:27 pm
Use brass knuckles – they transfer more energy directly to the punchee. Plus, when you punch somebody or something with your fist, they will usually try to hit you back or try to reason with you or something but if you punch them using brass knuckles, they will normally go down without a lot of fuss.
And all dogs should be punched – just on general principle. Most boxers, in a bid to develop that “Killer Instinct”, will get a gunny sack full of puppies, hang it from the rafters in the garage, and go to town. Plus, if Harry Potter has taught us anything, it’s that any large black dog is really an escaped convict in disguise and we should find a suitable beating stick before he has a chance to kill our other pets.
August 31st, 2009 at 4:34 pm
“What’s that? You want a treat? STOMACH PUNCH! No, wait, I didn’t mean it! Stop! That’s my face! Ow!”
Or, if it’s one of those annoying little dogs with annoying little barks, you can kick it.
Cats? I prefer throwing cats down basement stairwells (after they urinate in your laundry). Too bad they always land on four legs.
August 31st, 2009 at 4:42 pm
I agree Marko – if you have the right boots on, a kicked dog can have comparable hang time and distance to a kicked football.
And cats should just be ground up and turned into dog food for dogs. Who should immediately be beaten with a stick.
August 31st, 2009 at 5:30 pm
“Cat juggling, you take the little kitties, 3 to 4 weeks old, and you juggle them… for money.”
August 31st, 2009 at 6:21 pm
Punching dogs in the face makes Michael Vick cry.
August 31st, 2009 at 6:53 pm
how bout playing kick the baby?
August 31st, 2009 at 8:36 pm
Frank , Frank , Frank……. if its low to the ground like a dog …. you KICK it…….silly … I thought everybody knew that
August 31st, 2009 at 10:28 pm
unless it is a siberian husky, who will wag his tail, jump on you, and say “yay it’s play time!”
August 31st, 2009 at 10:56 pm
ANYONE caught punching my dogs will gain weight, (000 buck shot is heavy) and I have plenty of it.
September 1st, 2009 at 12:27 am
“If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous, he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and a man.”
– Mark Twain 1894.
September 1st, 2009 at 8:12 am
My three cats are reading this post with interest. They looked at me and told me to tell you all “bring it bitches”… I think they intend to “dance like a butterfly” away from your punch as they quickly and painfully attach all four “paws of death” to your nads!
September 2nd, 2009 at 7:19 am
You do not want to try to punch our pugs. Our German Shepherd will bite you. My wife will shoot you with her .38 and I will, out of family duty, back them all up with whatever ordnance is needed.