Comments on: Frank Advice for Life

By: 5 of 7

5 of 7 — Sat, 26 Sep 2009 05:20:28 +0000

A man went to the hardware store to buy washers. They were 6 cents a piece, so he went home and drilled holes in some nickels. (true story. I read it in Readers Digest.)

By: Idahoser

Idahoser — Fri, 25 Sep 2009 19:09:24 +0000

A penny made after 1982 is worthless. Before that, though, they were made of copper. A copper penny is worth 1.8¢ today. In a couple years it might be worth 10¢. Gee, I wonder if any other money is like that…?

By: Terry_Jim

Terry_Jim — Thu, 24 Sep 2009 05:27:00 +0000

Mmm, Mmm, Squirrel.

The Other Yellow Meat.

By: Nunya

Nunya — Thu, 24 Sep 2009 05:02:32 +0000

Pennies can be useful to put on the closed eyelids of dead Leftists.

By: Jimbobob

Jimbobob — Thu, 24 Sep 2009 00:35:32 +0000

MoogieP, just place them on railroad tracks for free and wait for a train. Then give ‘em away to local kids telling them, “This is what you’re money will be worth when you grow up. Squat.”

By: Silicon Valley Jim

Silicon Valley Jim — Thu, 24 Sep 2009 00:19:24 +0000

Pennies are worthless. You’ll get much more value out of them chucking them at squirrels.

I chuck them at hippies myself, on those rare occasions when I get to San Francisco. Sometimes I have to settle for lefties in Shallow Alto. I heat the pennies with a cigar lighter first.

By: MoogieP

MoogieP — Wed, 23 Sep 2009 23:47:19 +0000

For a penny and a quarter you can get a cool, squished and flattened penny at many a tourist trap! Presto, change-o! Just how Washington works, huh?

By: Wacky Hermit

Wacky Hermit — Wed, 23 Sep 2009 23:36:07 +0000

Pennies are VERY useful! A guy I met on a bus once told me how pennies can be used to solve our energy crisis. He said we could melt down all the pennies and turn them into copper wire, then use the wire to bring electricity to every home in the country! And the best part– it would be FREE because it would have been paid for by the PENNIES!

I guess nobody was listening to his brilliant plan, though, because they were prejudiced against his smell and scruffy appearance.

By: Dohtimes

Dohtimes — Wed, 23 Sep 2009 23:35:40 +0000

In the movie Pat Garrett and Billy the Kid this guy used a shotgun packed with dimes to shoot a man. In wimpy Obama World we have to chuck pennies a fuzzy tailed park rats.

By: Crusty

Crusty — Wed, 23 Sep 2009 22:47:45 +0000

I’ve never actually seen a “red” cent before so I couldn’t give one if I wanted to.

By: Live Free Or Die

Live Free Or Die — Wed, 23 Sep 2009 22:36:17 +0000

And if you chuck them at the Mutant Russian Black Squirrels, you’ll just make them mad,(or laugh, if you throw like a girl).

By: Live Free Or Die

Live Free Or Die — Wed, 23 Sep 2009 22:26:09 +0000

boycottnrsc.blogspot.com advocates not giving them (or any other monetary units) to the National Republican Senatorial Commitee. NOT ONE RED CENT!!

By: Live Free Or Die

Live Free Or Die — Wed, 23 Sep 2009 22:19:09 +0000

Put 50 pennies in a coin wrapper,hold it in your closed hand, then punch a hippie. When the O-bah-muhh Economy leaves you with pennies, make ‘copper knuckles’.

By: Bailey

Bailey — Wed, 23 Sep 2009 21:37:04 +0000

*fifty*

By: Bailey

Bailey — Wed, 23 Sep 2009 21:36:17 +0000

If you have fitify cents PLUS a penny, then you can make a pretty cool momento at Zoo Boise.

By: Jimmy

Jimmy — Wed, 23 Sep 2009 21:04:53 +0000

“A penny for your thoughts” takes on new meaning under Frank’s philosophy. For example, these days, a penny for a liberal’s thoughts will buy you endless, worthless babble. It use to buy some nice candy instead, but nooooooo. Not any more.

By: Son of Bob

Son of Bob — Wed, 23 Sep 2009 20:59:03 +0000

innominatus,

And, it will be more money than he’ll ever see from Barry or his life-partner Michelle.

By: innominatus

innominatus — Wed, 23 Sep 2009 20:56:36 +0000

Send the penny to Barry’s hut-dwelling bro’ in Kenya. As a percentage of his income, that penny would be pretty meaningful.

By: Plentyobailouts

Plentyobailouts — Wed, 23 Sep 2009 20:43:18 +0000

A penny and an underage prostitute will buy you 3 days at the clintons.

By: MarkoMancuso

MarkoMancuso — Wed, 23 Sep 2009 20:08:57 +0000

Unless you’re Ben Franklin, who did tricks with pennies to impress the ladies.

By: Ron Rockstar

Ron Rockstar — Wed, 23 Sep 2009 20:05:07 +0000

And a bird in the hand gets you bird tuberculosis and purple shit stains.

By: Crusty

Crusty — Wed, 23 Sep 2009 19:24:21 +0000

No no, you must not! Squirrels have accumulated over $2.3 trillion dollars of pennies over the past 60 years this way and are planning to topple the human economy! Eh, go ahead and throw pennies anyway. Obama is already toppling the human economy, worst the squirrels can do is beat him to it.

By: DamnCat

DamnCat — Wed, 23 Sep 2009 19:20:12 +0000

If you chuck it at squirrels with a slingshot, a penny will buy you a squirrel dinner.

By: snowed in

snowed in — Wed, 23 Sep 2009 19:05:36 +0000

Back in my poor college student days, I’d take the time to save up 25 pennies, so that I could go to the Student Union, exchange them for a quarter, and play Ms. Pac-Man. Don’t tell me they’re useless.