Random Thoughts

So should we start a pool on what country is going to get nuked first or which country going to first do the nuking?

Know what would be the quickest way to get rid of lots of nuclear weapons? A worldwide nuclear war.

All Michael Moore really needs is a good hug… except he’s too fat for anyone to get their arms around him so thus he is.

I wonder if the evil-universe version of me always wears a hat.

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More Weekend Videos

Dave Barry on free speech on college campuses:

A heartwarming story of a boy stopping a burglar:


Little Boy Heroically Shoots, Mutilates Burglar

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Frank J. Fleming’s amazingly consistent smile

You’ve seen, I’m sure, the video montage showing Barack Obama’s amazingly consistent smile.

And, as Harvey said, it’s amazing. Or creepy. Or something.

But, IMAO’s Frank J. has a similar talent, as this video shows…

[YouTube link]

Amazing. Or creepy. Or something.

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The Week in Blogs

IMAO got a mention in Vodkapundit’s The Week in Blogs. For the record, I regret nothing.

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Matrix Revolutions Deleted Scene

RiffTrax will be releasing The Martix Revolutions soon. I haven’t seen any of their Matrix riffs, though, so hopefully they’ll have a deal to get all three (they do seem ripe for humor; well, the first one does, I’m worried the latter too are too tedious). Anyway, RiffTrax has an exclusive deleted scene from Matrix Revolutions:

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Question of the Day

In the comments to the post on Obama’s creepily consistent smile, Crusty asked:

What’s the difference between Barack Obama and a cardboard cutout?

Well, here’s the side-by-side:

Have at it in the comments.

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I’m Not Sure What the Record For This Is, But I Think He’s Got It Now

Between March 24th and November 9th, 1993, Micheal Williams of the Minnesota Timberwolves sank 97 straight freethrows, setting an NBA record.

That sort of phenomenal precision in hitting a mark remained unsurpassed until September 23rd, 2009, when President Barack Obama managed to smile exactly the same way 130 consecutive times.


[Vimeo direct link]

I stand in awe of this man’s physical prowess.

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Ok, I Think I’ve Got the Hang of This Now

The illustrated version of The Lightning Round from the 9-24-09 Fred Thompson Show:


[YouTube direct link]

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Slandering Animals

With the Glenn Beck controversy over whether he boiled a frog alive (Oh no! Not a frog!), I think it should be mentioned in defense of frogs that they will eventually jump out of water if you gradually raise the heat on them and not just sit there until they’re boiled alive. Think about it: If you enter a room that’s really hot, you’ll immediately turn on the A/C or a fan. If you’re in a room that isn’t hot but the temperature is gradually raised, eventually you say, “This is too hot” and turn on the A/C or a fan. Frogs aren’t any different; they jump out of boiling water and if started in lukewarm water will also jump out eventually when the temperature is raised. Still, we tell a lie about them because we think it makes a great political analogy. The same happens to lemmings and ostriches who don’t mindlessly run off cliffs and don’t hide their head in the sand when there is danger; if they actually did either, they’d be extinct. Still, these falsehoods prevail because of their potential as political analogies for people we don’t like.

“So what? They’re just stupid animals; we can tell whatever lies we want about them. We have thumbs.”

You say that now, but what if they get sick of it, knock you down in an alleyway, and eat your eyeballs. That’s what animals do. That’s why you must always respect mother nature… unless you’re good with a gun. Then you can do what you want.

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Nuclear Disarmament Would Help the U.S.

The U.N. is pushing for nuclear disarmament again, and just for the record, I am completely for that. If we can get the whole world to dispose of nuclear weapons, that will make the few we secretly keep that much more powerful. Think of America being the only country with nuclear weapons again; we could do whatever we want and boss all the other countries around. And who would stop us? We could nuke anybody we want without worries.

So support disarmament; strategically it will be very useful if we play along.

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Let’s Make Fun of Michael Moore Being Fat

Michael Moore has a new movie coming out in which he’ll capitalistically make money off of gullible liberals’ hatred of capitalism. It would be cheap in response to just make fun of Michael Moore’s size, but it’s Friday and I don’t feel like thinking. So let’s pretend we’re writing an article about Michael Moore and we want to come up with a bunch of descriptive names for him so we don’t just keep calling him “Michael Moore”. Here I go:

DESCRIPTIVE NAMES FOR MICHAEL MOORE

* “the fat filmmaker”

* “the dumpy director”

* “the corpulent con-artist”

* “the rotund raconteur”

* “the flabby fabricator”

* “the blubbery blunderbuss”

* “the lard-filled liar”

* “the pudgy prevaricator”

* “the tubby tale-teller”

* “the hippo-like hypocrite”

* “fatty fatty fat fat”

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Random Thoughts

Liberals: “Republicans rhetoric is inciting people to murder! We must stop them any way we can, including murder!”

You shouldn’t be allowed to have “and” in your country name. Trinidad & Tobago sounds more like a buddy cop film than a nation.

Andrew Breitbart is looking less viking-like these days. I don’t like it.

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The problem isn’t what we did, it’s that you found out what we did

I’m sure you know about the video of school children being taught a song that praises Barack Obama. It’s been reported by several news outlets.

So, what do authorities of B. Bernice Young Elementary School in Burlington, NJ, say? School superintendent says the problem was … that someone videotaped it:

Superintendent Christopher Manno said in a written statement Thursday that the taping itself was out of order, but failed to address whether the the lesson was approved. “The recording and distribution of the class activity were unauthorized,” he wrote in a note to parents and the media.

Read that again.

He doesn’t say anything about public school students — that’s a school funded by your tax dollars, both New Jersey state taxes as well as federal funds from the Department of Education — being taught to sing the praises of Dear Leader. No, the problem is that someone taped it.

You see, now there’s evidence of it.

Think about it.

If someone told you about this story, would you believe it? You might think it’s one of Harvey’s Fake News stories. You’d be saying, “Heh. That’s a good one, Harvey. It’s almost like something that would happen.”

Only, it happened.

They can’t deny it. Because it was videotaped. And is on the YouTube.

And that’s how the left is: “The problem isn’t what we did, it’s that you found out what we did.”

Maybe that’s the way to handle things. That’s how they are handling the ACORN scandal: officials looking into charges over videotaping of illegal ACORN activity instead of the illegal ACORN activity.

I wonder how far this attitude could go. Or how well it would have worked in the past…

  • Ted Kennedy: The problem isn’t that Mary Jo Kopechne died, it’s that you found out about it.
  • Richard Nixon: The problem isn’t that I tried to cover up my staff’s involvement with the break-in at the Watergate, it’s that you found out about it.
  • Jeffrey Dahmer: The problem isn’t that I murdered 17 people and ate parts of some of them, it’s that you found out about it.
  • That guy getting the ticket on the Interstate last week: The problem isn’t that I was traveling 25 miles an hour over the posted limit, it’s that you found out about it.
  • The guy that spit in your food at the Waffle House: The problem isn’t that I spit in your food, it’s that you found out about it.

I wonder how many other ways this attitude could be used to excuse things?

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Is Thomas Frank Trying to Destroy the Democratic Party?

I think Thomas Frank is trying to destroy the Democratic Party. First, he told Democrats to take on the “liberty” issue and argue that the slavery of big government is a special kind of freedom. Now he’s in the WSJ again arguing that Democrats should give up the name-calling (the one thing they’re good at) and argue health care on the principles which would be death for them.

It’s pretty much in American DNA to reject liberal’s principles, and thus pretty much the only thing liberals have going for them is they never state explicitly what they actually believe which pretty much comes down to “You’re stupid and shouldn’t be able to make your own choices.” That’s why pretty much every liberals used to interacting in regular society knows to hold their tongue about what they actually think, often arguing the opposite (i.e., “You people need more choices; that’s why we want the public option.”). If liberals actually argued on the principles for what they truly believe, they’d be run out of town with pitchforks.

Why do want harm to come to Democrats, Thomas Frank? Are you really this naive a liberal, or are you some plot from the right-wing WSJ? If it weren’t for me having the attention span of a coke-snorting squirrel, I’d get to the bottom of this.

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Need Some Artistic Feedback

So, judging by the viewing stats, the Four Words From Obama video I made seemed fairly popular. So I fiddled around with doing a complete Lightning Round from the Fred Thompson show:


[YouTube direct link]

Wondering if I should lose the intro & trim the end, since they don’t add much entertainment value, or if it’s better to keep the whole segment intact?

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