When Would Democrats Approve of a War?
A liberal blogger pointed out what we all basically knew, that Democrats only supported the war in Afghanistan out of political calculation. So all that talk of Bush going to war for less than honorable intentions was really just projection.
But if Democrats don’t even honestly support a war when America was directly attacked, when would they ever approve of a war? Well, looking at when liberals legitimately get angry, here are things that could motivate them to start a war:
* Asking a tough question of president Obama.
* Giving aid or comfort to an attractive woman who is a conservative.
* Questioning how smart they actually are.
* Putting a plastic bottle in with regular trash.
* Suggestions of America’s exceptionalism.
* Being mean to terrorist masterminds.
* Mentions of God.
* Pointing out the extreme liberal bias in the media.
* Israel defending itself.
* Disagreeing with them. On anything.
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September 23rd, 2009 at 1:10 pm
* Shopping at Wal-Mart.
* Celebrating Independence Day.
* Supporting the members of the U.S. military.
September 23rd, 2009 at 1:15 pm
September 23rd, 2009 at 1:16 pm
HAHA Marko #3
September 23rd, 2009 at 1:16 pm
* To defend Mother Earth from attacks by EEEEEVILLLL capitalists!
September 23rd, 2009 at 1:20 pm
* To keep Acorn from being embarrassed
September 23rd, 2009 at 1:25 pm
* For suggesting that maybe a democrat should be investigated for possible wrongdoing.
September 23rd, 2009 at 1:33 pm
* For suggesting that the Democrat Party is dead and Obama is just burying it.
September 23rd, 2009 at 1:47 pm
Implying that FARK commenters are farkwads.
September 23rd, 2009 at 2:18 pm
Simply stating that you are a Republican is an act of war to democrats. Just ask Sarah Palin, Michelle Bachman, Michelle Malken, Ann Coulter, etc. Even if you’re a flaming liberal like John McCain, if you pretend to act like a Republican for a few days they will call for your head.
September 23rd, 2009 at 2:23 pm
It turns out that the libjihad against Christianity is, like so many other items, context-sensitive. For example, a meeting between the Los Angeles City Council and a bunch of union leaders culminated in a public-screwing, future-hosing deal and a prayer of thanks. Charming, really. Like the Hussein brothers saying grace before getting down to business in a rape room.
September 23rd, 2009 at 3:13 pm
Hemp.
War for hemp is always justified.
September 23rd, 2009 at 3:25 pm
Greens are allowed to mix plastic with regualr trash, just like they can own private jets and houseboats.
War is permitted if:
*People are nefariously defending themselves.
*They support communists going to war with US allies.
September 23rd, 2009 at 3:38 pm
Any country in the world with a big enough sob story, and no strategic value to the US.
September 23rd, 2009 at 3:50 pm
But the Democraps do approve of some wars. They’re just horribly bad at warfare & never seem to have their priorities straight: WW1, WW2, Korea, Vietnam…all of which they bungled on way or another and had to have a Republican administration come in after them and set things right.
The main reason I think they opposed the war in Iraq so vehemently is that they expected it to falter right away. Instead it turned out to be a resounding success from the start, what with the main objectives being met in record time & the total soldier death toll still not reaching what it was in a single year in Vietnam.
This war makes making them look as bad at warfare as they are at everything else, so they had to undermine it any way possible. If Gore had been elected in 2000, they might’ve been more supportive, but that’s a moot point; Gore is a pansy and would’ve appeased the barbarians even after another US-based attack, which almost certainly would have happened.
September 23rd, 2009 at 4:53 pm
* Ann Coulter continues to breathe.
* Rush Limbaugh sits in front of a microphone (even if it’s not plugged in).
* Posting videos of Jeremiah Wright spouting racist crackpot theories on the internet just because Obama faithfully attended Wright’s church for several years (because people might jump to the erroneous conclusion that Obama was, you know, listening or something. Not that there’s anything wrong with that).
* Hanging your Sarah Palin 2010 Alaska souvenir calendar up at your workspace in plain view of the general public (if you know what I mean, and I think you do).
September 23rd, 2009 at 5:18 pm
Libs will go to war over…
* Right to life for the unborn.
* Anything, or anyone non-union.
* Individual freedom of choice.
* Having to do work to earn money.
* Promoting capability over popularity.
The list is endless, if you just take a look at the communist manefesto.
September 23rd, 2009 at 5:51 pm
Libtards will go to war…
* if you wear a tee shirt reading: I LOVE THE USA.
* if you mention CHRISTMAS.
* if you mention SANTA CLAUS.
* if you wear fur on a cold day.
* if you sing GOD BLESS AMERICA.
* if you quote THE CONSTITUTION.
Liberals will go to war and tear you from limb to limb if you criticize O’Bumbler.
September 23rd, 2009 at 5:59 pm
Homeschooling. The Public “Education” system can’t do it’s job if you don’t put them in it. As long as people can escape the indoctrination they will have enemies.
September 23rd, 2009 at 6:04 pm
If Honduras kicks out a Hugo Chavez puppet/wannabe.
If Ahmedinajad is overthrown by Modernist Pro-Western populace.
If Hamas/ PLF/ PLO/ Al-Aqsa Martyrs Brigade/ etc… are being routed by Israeli Defense Forces.
If the poppy fields of Afghani War Lords are in danger of being napalmed by U.S. Troops
If evil health insurance companies are making a profit
If George Soros’ overseas investments are threatened.
September 23rd, 2009 at 6:25 pm
They will go to war to oppose war itself. Look at the Weather Underground.
September 23rd, 2009 at 8:15 pm
When the Japanese conveniently attack Hawaii, paving the way to declare executive authority beyond what the US Constitution provides, such as wiring tapping US citizens home phones, detaining citizens without trial, declaring ownership of property and money to be illegal. Heck, Democrats still talk about how great FDR was and are not embarrassed that he served 12 years, rather they wish he had lived to serve more.
They have no problem with war. They just need it to work in their favor.
September 23rd, 2009 at 8:21 pm
Any nation making abortion on demand illegal would be an immediate act of war…
September 23rd, 2009 at 8:22 pm
Giving aid or comfort to an attractive woman who is a conservative
ALL attractive women are conservative. Just think about it. Conservative women: Sarah Palin, Helen Smith, Michelle Malkin, Mary Katharine Ham . . . Lefty women: Helen Thomas, Michelle “my butt is the size of Cook County” Obama, Hillary Clinton, Maureen Dowd . . .
September 23rd, 2009 at 8:25 pm
Oops. Looks like my attempt to close the italics tag failed there. Add Condoleezza Rice to the conservative list.
September 23rd, 2009 at 8:30 pm
Have Michelle lose a bet that she can squeeze her feet into Yao Ming’s sneakers.
See more than two white people congregate and not confess to being racist hate mongers.
To protect the moon from right wing nukes.
Rid the world of buckets so Barry can re-grow the ‘fro with having to go around with a pick in his pocket.
To kill everyone who thinks war is hell since there is no hell.
September 24th, 2009 at 1:31 am
Libs go to war against anyone who does the job that journalists used to do.
September 26th, 2009 at 1:12 am
… Whenever and Wherever the G-20 meet.
Only, did you notice they call them “Anarchists” now? What? “Liberals” and “Socialists” don’t form “Angry Mobs” anymore? I didn’t see any “Typical White Grandmothers” throwing rocks so I’m sure they weren’t trying to equate the TEA party or Anti-Obamacare protestors with the anti-capitalists nutjobs getting pepper sprayed by Pittsburg’s finest today.