Frank Advice for Life

If you find a box on your doorstep labeled “Free Badger”, don’t open it; there could be a badger inside.

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21 Comments

  1. It’s possible, however, that the box could contain mushrooms or snakes. I don’t like mushrooms, but snakes can be used to eliminate your enemies (and their annoying Dachshund that never stops barking). Therefore, I disagree with Frank.

    Badgers are harmless anyway. Just ask the Iowa Hawkeyes.

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  2. How can the badger be free if is captive in a box?

    Suppose they fool you and write “free bacon” on the box?

    What happen if the box is labled “Free Badger”, you don’t open the box, and it was actually bacon?

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  3. This is pretty sound advice, although I must admit I’ve never actually heard of anyone finding a box on their doorstep marked “Free Badger”. However, I have heard of people finding a burning brown paper bag on their doorstep….’specially on Halloween eve. Here’s some more sound advice….don’t stomp on it!

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  4. We had a dachshund named Baron when I was a kid.
    He used to chew the shells off golfballs and then bark at them when the rubberbands inside snapped and hit him in the nose.
    We never had any trouble with badgers while he was around.

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  5. I agree. If Badger is in need of freeing, he should stay put. I mean, after he humped Mal on that salvage job, then held the crew hostage on the cattle smuggling operation, he totally deserves to be stuck in that box. Stupid Badger.

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