Happy Birthday, Marines!
Thanks for killing bad people in foreign lands!
It’s a special day for the Marines, and here is how I heard they will spend it:
MARINES’ PLAN FOR BIRTHDAY
1. Kill evil foreigners.
2. Punch hippies.
3. Kill evil foreign hippies.
4. Eat cake.
5. Open presents of more ammo.
6. Share present with evil foreigners.
7. Contemplate root causes of what makes foreigners evil.
8. Determine it’s them breathing.
9. Kill evil foreigners having a birthday and eat their cake and open their presents.
10. Tell schoolkids not to do drugs.
11. Blow stuff up.
12. Sleep, have dreams of battles in which they easily best ninjas and pirates.
Anyway, thanks again, Marines, for keeping America safe. I’d wish for peace in the world, but then you’d probably get bored.
And this seems as good a time as any to post the Warrior Song again because it’s fun:
Also, don’t forget to donate to Valour IT in the Marines’ name; they’re nearly to their goal:
(19 votes, average: 4.79 out of 5)
Loading ...
November 10th, 2009 at 1:14 pm
Not if the Democrats have their way!
November 10th, 2009 at 1:16 pm
Frank, your list isn’t complete, as that’s what the Marines will do before breakfast. Anyway, happy birthday brothers.
Ssgt John Bates
USMC
November 10th, 2009 at 1:25 pm
Thanks for the birthday wishes! Semper. Kill kill kill; stabbity death.
November 10th, 2009 at 1:32 pm
Attaching electrodes to the genitals of Gon Kerry.
November 10th, 2009 at 1:33 pm
Semper Fi and Happy Birthday, from a squid to the Devil Dogs! I sleep better at night, knowing the Marines are out there, kicking evil foreign hippies’ butts.
November 10th, 2009 at 1:47 pm
Generosity itself, that’s what. Sharing their ammo with jihadis, fascists and sundry evil furriners like that. Makes me proud to be American.
Thank you, gentlemen, you American psychos. You are the Eagle’s talons. May we be as faithful as you have always been.
November 10th, 2009 at 1:59 pm
The Old Man says you forgot the booze part (a very IMPORTANT part of any Marine Birthday Party).
You start with a toast to the Oldest Marine.
Then you have a toast to the Youngest Marine.
Then have a toast to the Corps.
Then a toast to Brothers Absent.
Then when you’re well lubricated, you lay out plans to kill more evil foreigners.
November 10th, 2009 at 2:01 pm
Whuuup!!
November 10th, 2009 at 2:04 pm
The Old Man says you forgot the booze (and IMPORTANT part of any Marine Corps Birthday Party)!
First you drink a toast to the Oldest Marine.
Then you drink a toast to the Youngest Marine.
Then you drink a toast to the Corps.
Finally you drink a toast to Brothers Absent.
Then, well lubricated, you reminisce on evil foreigners killed and lay out plans to kill more evil foreigners.
Fun City.
November 10th, 2009 at 2:06 pm
Can they kick yuppie butt after breakfast? If you’ve been on the west coast, you’ll know people who want to be hippies but are too materialistic to skip showers and live in communes. Trust me, these guys are way worse than hippies.
November 10th, 2009 at 2:27 pm
Happy Birthday and God bless!
November 10th, 2009 at 2:49 pm
Thanks Frank! Happy Birthday to your brother, and if anyone sees my cousin Buck, tell him the Guinness is on me!
November 10th, 2009 at 3:17 pm
The best part about the Marines? They don’t discriminate. They’ll kill evil foreigners in the air, land, or sea!
November 10th, 2009 at 3:40 pm
Got a cousin who’s a vet from the first Iraq war. Happy birthday, Marine. Semper Fi.
November 10th, 2009 at 4:11 pm
Foreign leftists like in Russia or well the rest of the world that isn’t Europe have to actually have balls. And being a martyr there is a real physical problem not an emotional pre-occupation. In those places I am a martyr=dead. However in US and Europe I am a martyr= Rich and Famous.
November 10th, 2009 at 5:07 pm
3. Kill evil foreign hippies.
3.a. Kill evil domestic hippies. (please?)
From this lowly but grateful civilian: Happy Birthday to the Corps, and a sincere Thank You to all our armed forces, past present and future.
November 10th, 2009 at 5:14 pm
Thanks for the birthday greetings, Frank.
Ordinarily, I would toast the entire chain of command, as long as we don’t run out of booze. This year the CinC acts more like an evil foreigner than a CinC. I’m going to have to contemplate that one!
Semper Fi, Brothers!
November 10th, 2009 at 6:01 pm
Happy Birthday Warriors!
November 10th, 2009 at 9:31 pm
You silly people. Everyone (okay, all the Combat Engineers, which is everyone important) knows that you Blow Stuff Up before you Eat Cake. Happy Birthday Marines!
November 10th, 2009 at 10:30 pm
“And when he goes to heaven
To Saint Peter he will tell;
Another Marine reporting, sir;
I’ve served my time in hell!
-Epitaph on grave of Pfc. Cameron of the Marine Corps, Guadalcanal, 1942.
“Stay with me, God, the night is dark,
The night is cold; my little spark
Of courage dies. The night is long;
Be with me, God, and make me strong.”
-Poem, found on a scrap of paper in a slit trench in Tunisia during the battle of El Agheila, 1944.
“We sure liberated the hell out of this place.”
-American soldier in the ruins of a French village, 1944.
“Ihr Racker, wollt ihr ewig leben?
Come on, you sons of b*tches! Do you want to live forever?”
-Marine Sergeant Daniel Daly, 1918.
November 11th, 2009 at 4:17 pm
LOL.
Marines aren’t Soldiers.
Soldiers are Soldiers.
Airmen are Airmen.
Crewmen are Crewmen.
Sailors are Sailors.
Marines are Marines.