Comments on: Universe Once Again Conspiring Against Science!

By: Son of Bob

Son of Bob — Tue, 10 Nov 2009 14:19:32 +0000

Well, leave it to the French to come up with a word that’s actually gayer than “Twitter”…baguette.

By: Basil

Basil — Tue, 10 Nov 2009 12:28:46 +0000

African Swallow or European Swallow?

By: Terry_Jim

Terry_Jim — Tue, 10 Nov 2009 05:34:48 +0000

They should have built the collider someplace with softer baked goods,
like near a Wonder Bread bakery.

By: Paul

Paul — Tue, 10 Nov 2009 04:43:38 +0000

You know, I think I’ve got a Higgs boson in my closet, or maybe my junk drawer. . . could they use that?

By: Thor

Thor — Tue, 10 Nov 2009 04:30:22 +0000

Why leave something outside that is so damn fragile that a crust of bread can destroy it? My Dad used to fly off the handle if a screwdriver was left outside overnight.

Now I know why, of course. Baguette damage is a horrible thing to explain to the insurance guy.

By: NO_MO_BAMA

NO_MO_BAMA — Tue, 10 Nov 2009 02:17:23 +0000

ok, I guess it’s easy to confuse them

So how come those people get to build some machine that can blow up the universe or something but when we want to build a few nuke plants or drop a couple H-bombs on people who really deserve it (plus lighten the load on global warming) everyone gets all pissed off….wtf is up with that?

By: NO_MO_BAMA

NO_MO_BAMA — Tue, 10 Nov 2009 02:10:17 +0000

so what’s all this about France?

By: NO_MO_BAMA

NO_MO_BAMA — Tue, 10 Nov 2009 02:09:36 +0000

The core of the superconducting solenoid magnet at the Large Hadron Collider in Switzerland.

By: 5 of 7

5 of 7 — Tue, 10 Nov 2009 02:05:45 +0000

Is that why my socks keep disappearing in the dryer?

By: Corona

Corona — Tue, 10 Nov 2009 02:04:42 +0000

I still believe you’re obsessed with Higgs’ bosom.

By: KnitterChick

KnitterChick — Tue, 10 Nov 2009 01:59:08 +0000

Nature hates us and is trying to kill us. This is why I don’t camp.

By: Silicon Valley Jim

Silicon Valley Jim — Tue, 10 Nov 2009 01:40:05 +0000

This is further evidence that the universe is out to stop humanity from discovering the Higgs boson.

The universe has failed in its attempt. I discovered a Higgs boson yesterday while doing my laundry. It was under the pile of dirty socks. It was quite a relief to find it; I was wondering where it had gotten to. I can’t wait to see what’s under the pile of dirty shirts.

By: Burt

Burt — Tue, 10 Nov 2009 01:34:18 +0000

I believe America’s collider is surrounding Waxahachie TX, Clinton cut funding in 1993 when it was discovered that it could possibly attract birds

By: Rubeus

Rubeus — Tue, 10 Nov 2009 01:28:00 +0000

WTF IS A BAGUETTE?!
I thought it was another name for a small purse, but apparently it’s some kind of flying gaybread…

By: 5 of 7

5 of 7 — Tue, 10 Nov 2009 01:11:25 +0000

I remember when they tried to build a supercolider in America. They got as far as digging the big circular hole in the ground and lavishly furnishing the offices of the directors of the project; but when it came out that they had no idea how to to build the superconducting magnets they’d need to actually make the thing work, Congress pulled the funding. Those were the good old days. Sigh. I wonder what they did with the hole.

By: [Alternate universe]Axelrod

[Alternate universe]Axelrod — Tue, 10 Nov 2009 01:09:45 +0000

You know, in my universe where hope and change has not occurred, we are waiting for this thing to finally rip a hole in the whole space time continuum so we can exchange our John Mcsame, for you’re universe’s B.O. So can you guys get it together, already. “Not ere’ universe can benefit from the splendor, of the illuminating light of Barack Hussian jamal warner
hakkem Obama’s dictatorship as your universe so obviously has”. You jerks! I want to be you, all of you!

By: MarkoMancuso

MarkoMancuso — Tue, 10 Nov 2009 01:06:37 +0000

‘Tis well known that Science! is a black man.

I’m just sayin’.

Dang racist birds.

By: Eric

Eric — Tue, 10 Nov 2009 00:47:23 +0000

How lame is America now? Fifty million American flag-waving, tea-party, small-government, kill the bill, patriots can’t keep congress from passing legislation, but one fat bird with a crust of stale french bread can shut down the biggest science experiment of all time. IN FRANCE! I am depressed.

By: Rick

Rick — Tue, 10 Nov 2009 00:44:09 +0000

Back in the day, people use to take the collider seriously – it even made them afraid of the end of the world for a brief shining moment … that was then…. but when you lose a battle with a baguette, your days of instilling fear upon the masses are pretty much over.

By: ussjimmycarter

ussjimmycarter — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 22:35:55 +0000

Higgs called! He is pretty upset about his life. All the kids in school use to call a wedgie a boson where he’s from. After years of tormet Higgs became a girl so that she could have a lesbian affair with a married woman. When asked about it it, Higgs replied “how gay is that?”…

By: slarrow

slarrow — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 22:13:55 +0000

Science! I keeel you….

By: Jimmy

Jimmy — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 22:03:19 +0000

“And next time make a less fragile universe with hardier bosons.”

Are you talking to God, Frank? Be careful he doesn’t smite you with an angry Higgs. You wouldn’t like Higgs when he’s angry. I ran into Higgs the other day and he was one pissed-off Bosun.

By: IH8Socialist

IH8Socialist — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 21:57:07 +0000

I don’t know if slamming two hippies togther at the speed of light would help discover the Higgs Bison but it sure would be cool.

By: Jimmy

Jimmy — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 21:31:29 +0000

It wasn’t bread. It was doodoo. The LHC is in deep doodoo.

By: Ernie Loco

Ernie Loco — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 21:23:35 +0000

It makes me glad that they’re having all these retarded problems over in Europe instead of here in the U.S. I mean, we’d probably have the same sort of problems, but this way I can openly mock the whole of Europe for sucking at science!