Frank Advice for Life
Speak softly and carry a big stick, unless you’re going through security at the airport. Then they’ll be like, “Why do you have that big stick? Stop speaking so softly; I can’t hear you!”
(17 votes, average: 4.71 out of 5)
Loading ...
January 25th, 2010 at 4:00 pm
does a 2×4 with a nail in the end of it count as a big stick?
January 25th, 2010 at 4:36 pm
What if you’re going to speak to American elementary school children and you need the big sticks to hold up your teleprompters?
January 25th, 2010 at 4:48 pm
Walk softly? Is this for ninjas?
January 25th, 2010 at 5:30 pm
That’s not a bomb in my unerwear, it’s just my big stick.
:-I
January 25th, 2010 at 5:43 pm
So a Big Stick is all it takes?
True story: while a gaggle of TSA officers stood around doing nothing, the officer in my line stopped the conveyor belt. 15 minutes later, I find out it was because of a dreaded cup of yogurt in my bag. Darnit, I could have eaten the thing in less time, then proceeded through the gate rather than have them throw it out OR hold up the line. Idjits.
January 25th, 2010 at 6:50 pm
Speak softly and carry an ugly stick. If you encounter a hippie feel free to beat him with it.
January 25th, 2010 at 7:26 pm
I always liked the German way, as described in The Guns of August.
Yell and carry a Krupp howitzer.
January 25th, 2010 at 8:02 pm
Why the big stick? It’s so I can beat the living shit out of the guy sitting next to me with the flaming underwear and the fuse sticking out of his shoe.
January 26th, 2010 at 11:59 am
Liberals are stick softly and carry a big talk.
January 27th, 2010 at 2:22 am
True story: my Norelco electric razor got nudged into starting while in my carryon, when the TSA inspector was jostling things about with her fingers. The buzzing and vibrating apparently reminded her of training about rattlers or bomb timers, because she jumped pretty high. Then she asked me what would be moving in my bag – and I could not answer as I did not know she had turned on my Norelco. So she let ME rummage through the bag to remove whatever was buzzing and vibrating. Good thing it wasn’t the timer to my carry-on KABOOM device.
So if you want to carry a rechargeable Norelco on a plane, beware of the TSA.
January 27th, 2010 at 2:23 am
As for teh big stick, I have had zero problem carrying a stout cane aboard aircraft. Beware, miscreants, or I shall denigrate your behaviour verbally whilst waggling my cane at you!