Horrors! Republicans wants illegal things to be crimes! The brutes!

DNC Chair Wasserman Schultz is claiming that Republicans want to consider being an illegal alien a crime.

Oh, the humanity! The horror! The … what’s that again?

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Yes, she’s appalled that Republicans would want people who are in this country illegally to be considered … illegal.

Well, well, well. Let’s look up “illegal” in the dictionary. Merriam-Webster. Not Urban Dictionary. That’s useful for looking up words and phrases you hear on Red Eye. But for regular words that normal people use, Merriam-Webster will do.

illegal: adj \(ˌ)i(l)-ˈlē-gəl\
not according to or authorized by law : unlawful, illicit

Synonyms: criminal, felonious, illegitimate, illicit, lawless, unlawful, wrongful
Antonyms: lawful, legal, legitimate

And those evil, evil Republicans want illegals to be considered the first word listed by Merriam-Webster as a synonym: criminal. Can you imagine.

We did some checking. And she’s right. And not only that, here are some other things Republicans consider to be true that are contrary to her and the Democrats way of thinking. Besides being somewhere illegally being a crime.

  • Fire is hot.
  • Water is wet.
  • Sky is blue.
  • Women have secrets.
  • Ice is cold.
  • Grass is green.
  • Diamonds are hard.
  • Circles are round.
  • Bacon is yummy.
  • Roses are red.
  • Violets are purples.
  • Sugar is sweet.
  • So’s maple surple.
  • Ducks quack.

It must be nice to be that stupid and still get paid.

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  1. Her voice should be illegal and so should hyphenated names, if you can’t even decide what your own name is, you really have no business deciding what is and isn’t “illegal”. It’s always fun to say to a liberal: If someone breaks into your house, are they illegal? You get that blank stare look like….what does that have to do with it…? I wonder how many seconds (not minutes or hours) it would take her to change her tune if you dropped her off in the middle of all the places she claims have no right to decide who lives there.


  2. Twit.
    Her comment after the South Carolina GOP forum was,
    “Of course the Republican’s liked Herman Cain, he’s a BUSINESS MAN!”
    Her voice dripped with haughty sarcasm as if she had revealed some deep, dark, evil secret about Republicans.

    I expect any 2012 discussion on cable news with that moron to sound like this:

    GOP Strategist/ Office Holder/ or Commentator:
    “Ask yourself, are you better off than you were 4 years ago?”

    Debbie “Smart as a Chair” Wasserman Schultz:
    “Racist! How dare you ask such a racist question, you Racist!”


  3. That’s just Progressive thinking talking: Every day is the beginning of Year Zero; nothing that happened in the past matters; and nothing is anything until we say what it is. (Illegal? Call it Undocumented, or better, Temporarily Undocumentated.) This has been going on since Kipling’s day, and has killed more people than anything else you can think of, but I guess her type wouldn’t know that, it being Year Zero and all.


  4. What kind of wimpy weiner allows his woman to keep her orig. name? She needs to be slapped. Hard and nasty! The hard way, the nasty way, the hard and nasty way! And then she shall be told, woman you shall take my name and drop yours or you shall be slapped again! That’s how real men handle their women!!! See what happened to the country when John Wayne died!


  5. She sounds like one of the fish from ‘Pee Wee’s Playhouse’. I half expect her to follow up everything she says with that trademark ‘Haa Haa Haaaaaa’ laugh they do.

    I wonder if Aquaman can summon her with his powers? If so, Aquaman finally has value!


  6. @No_Mo_Bama: Amen, bruddah. I don’t have a prob with women keeping their last names, but the hyphenation is a sign of virtual indecision brought on by an overdose of feminist claptrap. Worse is when the husband hyphenates his name. That’s a sign of virtual whipped-ness.

    @Marko: Grant followed Lee’s famous quote with, “Well Lee, you were the one who rallied a nation by invading it with an inferior force. Where does that put you on the terrible scale?”

    @Plentyo: Well, to be fair, the Republicans don’t have a stellar track record with regards to its selection of chairmen. I met the Chairman of the Republican Party back in the 80’s (this is absolutely not a brush with greatness). I can’t remember his name, and that’s good. He was a respectable guy who stayed out of the news and who raised bootloads of money. Where are the nameless chairmen of yesteryear?


  7. Pingback: IMAO » Blog Archive » lolbama! Part 65

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