Barack Obama and communists don’t like college football. Just sayin’.
So, if you are Barack Obama, a communist, or just don’t care about college football, there’s nothing to see here.
After going a perfect 8-0 last week, I’m now 16-0 with my college football picks for the season, and look to extend my perfect record.
What’s that? Oklahoma, Notre Dame, and Miami? I didn’t get those games wrong. Florida State, Michigan, and Ohio State did. Like in the 2008 presidential election. I was right. 53% of America was wrong. So, my unblemished record remains.
This week, we’ll look at the teams from Frank J’s, Harvey’s and my teams. Okay, maybe Harvey doesn’t care that much about Wisconsin Badgers football. Still, we’re looking at that game. Plus a few others.
And, as some of you might say, I can’t pick the winners. So, I’ll pick the losers. I seem to be as good at picking the losers as I am the winners, so here we go.
Tulsa vs Boise State (4)
This season, the Golden Hurricane has beaten every team it’s played that’s not from Oklahoma. Boise isn’t in Oklahoma. So, logically, Tulsa should win.
Just kidding, Frank J and Sarah K. Just kidding.
Who’s gonna lose? Tulsa.
South Dakota vs Wisconsin (6)
Another tune-up game. South Dakota needs to get ready to face NAIA powerhouse Lindenwood next week. Or, maybe Wisconsin has to do something to get ready for next week’s game with Nebraska. Whatever. The Coyotes just need to ride out this week’s attack by the Badgers. But Harvey doesn’t care.
Who’s gonna lose? South Dakota.
North Carolina State vs Cincinnati
This week’s prime time pillow fight features the Wolfpack — who have beaten two pushovers but lost to another ACC school — and the Bearcats — who have beaten two pushovers but lost to an SEC school. Losing to an ACC school is worse than losing to an SEC school. So North Carolina State is the worse team. I sure hope those rumors about NC State being one of the possibilities for being the SEC’s 14th team aren’t true.
Who’s gonna lose? North Carolina State.
Central Florida at Brigham Young
BYU smacked an SEC school its first time out this season. But it was Mississippi. And they’ve since lost 2 in a row. Central Florida, meanwhile, won two games big, and lost last week close. But, like this game, none of that matters in this week’s “Isn’t Anything Else On” game.
Who’s gonna lose? Central Florida.
Arkansas (14) vs Alabama (3)
This battle in the SEC west will be a fun game to watch. Alabama is good. But so is Arkansas. Just not as good. Arkansas will win the SEC West some year. But they’ll be hard-pressed to win this matchup this week on CBS.
Who’s gonna lose? Arkansas.
Oklahoma State (7) vs Texas A&M (8)
ABC has this game. I wish I cared. But I don’t. Except that Texas A&M might actually become an SEC team next year. I’ll care then.
Who’s gonna lose? Oklahoma State.
Florida State (11) vs Clemson (21)
The undefeated Kitties from Death Valley play host to a bunch of Wild Indians from North Florida in a big ACC matchup of ranked teams. After getting run over by a Sooner Schooner last week, Jimbo Fisher will try to get his patched-up tribe ready to face the sharp claws of Dabo Sweeney’s Orange Tabbies. The Tigers will get a few licks in, but the Seminoles are just too tough.
Who’s gonna lose? Clemson.
LSU (2) vs West Virginia (16)
In the day’s final matchup of ranked teams, Les Miles and his Bayou Bengals travel to Morgantown, West Virginia to face Dana Holgorsen’s Hillbillies in a face-off between the best of the Big East and the best of the SEC.
Lots of pundits are calling for the Mountaineers to upset the Tigers. I’m not lots of pundits.
Who’s gonna lose? West Virginia.
North Carolina vs Georgia Tech (25)
Paul Johnson’s flexbone offense put up the most yardage in Georgia Tech NCAA history last week as they crushed Kansas. 768 yards of total offense, including 604 on the ground. That’s a lot. But, in an asterisk, isn’t the most Tech has put up ever. They had 1,420 yards rushing in their 222-0 win back in 1916, before there was an NCAA.
North Carolina, meanwhile, has rolled to 3 straight wins, and is looking to paint Atlanta some girly-looking blue. A win by the Tar Heels would go a ways towards removing the “interim” form Everett Withers’s title.
Unless the Yellow Jackets revert to the Humble Bumbles we’ve come to expect and shake our heads at, that high school offense of Tech will be unstoppable. Plus, their defense is getting better. They’re not there yet, but they’re getting there.
Who’s gonna lose? North Carolina.
Georgia vs Mississippi
The last-place team in the SEC East travels west to face the last-place team in the SEC West. This is definitely a “who cares” game. Except for Ole Miss and Georgia fans.
This game will help determine who gets fired first: Houston Nutt or Mark Richt. Then, there’s the Boise State connection. Nutt used to be the head coach at Boise State. Richt will be Boise State’s next head coach, maybe next year.
Mississippi isn’t as bad as they looked against Vanderbilt, but they are bad. Georgia isn’t as good as they looked against Coastal Carolina. But they’re good. Okay, maybe not good, but okay. And okay beats bad.
Who’s gonna lose? Mississippi.
I may not have picked your games. In fact, I probably didn’t. So, I’ll fix that now.
Who’s gonna lose? The team that’s playing your team.
Like it should be.