Nuke the News: GOP Debate, Osama, and Picture with the First Lady

Posted on October 19, 2011 11:00 am

* I have a new Pajamas Media column on what Occupy Wall Street has to do before they have their Kent State moment. I mean, getting shot by the National Guard is always a good idea, but you have to do some prep work first.

* So there was a Republican debate in Las Vegas last night hosted by one of the two guys from Siegfried & Roy — no, wait, it was Anderson Cooper.

Okay, weirdest thing: Romney actually had a cheering section. Pretty much everywhere, people are just “meh” about Romney, but at this debate the crowd was cheering anything he said and booing quite legitimate attacks on him. I hear this is because Nevada has a large Mormon population and apparently they cheer on any Mormon even if he’s a weasel (or if he’s a decrepit husk of man, as that would explain how Reid keeps getting reelected). Anyway, it was very off-putting. And for some reason, with Romney having a favorable crowd, this was the debate the other candidates decided to really go after Romney. Man is that guy hard to nail down. They’ll hit him with a devastating point, and he’ll just deflect, go off on a tangent, or completely lie.

Well, I’m just griping; apparently it’s determined now he’s going to be our nominee. I will refuse to vote for him, though — but only because I’m in Idaho and it won’t matter.

Anyway, Perry was a bit more alert for this debate, but he always just seems to be treading the line between coherence and incoherence. And early on everyone gained up on Cain and his 9-9-9 plan giving him the image of being the front runner. And there were other people at the debate, but let’s stop pretending they’re important. Some people say they’d like to see Newt Gingrich in a debate with Obama, but I wasn’t impressed with how he stood up to Romney. He tried to attack Romney on the individual mandate, but Romney came back and said he got the idea from Gingrich and the Heritage Foundation. It’s like Gingrich came into Romney’s bedroom and found him working on an individual mandate and yelled, “Who taught you how to do this stuff?” And Romney screamed back, “From you, all right?! I learned it by watching you!” Parents who do social engineering have children who do social engineering.

So how much longer is all this going on? If Romney is going to be the nominee, let’s just the rip the band-aid and get this over with. It’s just the sitting here looking at the doctor hold the giant needle that’s killing me.

* Then again, Obama actually came out and specifically attacked Herman Cain’s 9-9-9 plan. Usually, the president would ignore anything he doesn’t consider a real threat, but then again Obama is kind of stupid and irritable. Still, getting attacked by the president gives Cain some more bona fides.

I keep thinking that because we all hate Romney, there has to be a way we can get another nominee, but I remember McCain in 2008. Oy. We Republicans.

* In defending Obama about being unprepared to be president, David Axelrod said, “So when you say he wasn’t prepared, maybe you should go ask Osama bin Laden if he thought he was.” Yeah, expect Osama to be trotted out a lot — it’s Obama’s one positive accomplishment he can point to.

“We don’t have jobs.”

“Well, know who also doesn’t have a job? Osama — because he’s dead!”

* Thieves stole Obama’s teleprompters. When reached for comment, Obama’s reaction was, “I don’t know what to say.”

* Wisdom of the Day: “You know whose opinion on Mormonism I’d like to hear? Jeremiah Wright.” -David Burge

* In case you want your picture taken with the First Lady, it costs $10,000. The fee is needed to make sure the First Lady is never pictured with poor people. They often tend to be obese.

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28 Responses to “Nuke the News: GOP Debate, Osama, and Picture with the First Lady”

  1. FormerHostage says:

    A photo with Moochelle? Is it a real portrait or do you have to stuff yourself into one of those picture-booth things and wait for the flash?

    How much for a picture with Aunt Zeituni?

  2. Penultimatum says:

    I heard a rumor that Osama bin Laden put out a tape to be released posthumously. Money quote – “And that Obama guy? Unprepared. Not ready at all.”

  3. Jimmy says:

    “It’s just the sitting here looking at the doctor hold the giant needle that’s killing me.”

    Yeah, with no choice about it going into your rump versus your arm.

    And… it’s a square needle.

    Und… you vill like it!

  4. Basil says:

    Only in America are the poor also overfed. Is this a great country or what?

  5. CTD says:

    “Well, I’m just griping; apparently it’s determined now he’s going to be our nominee. I will refuse to vote for him, though”

    Eventually you’re going to have to come around and realize that Ron Paul is the actual conservative you’re looking for. Per the WSJ, Paul would cut 50 times as much spending as Magic Underwear Guy. Wait! That sounds too good – he must be crazy!

  6. Johnny45 says:

    “I will refuse to vote for him, though — but only because I’m in Idaho and it won’t matter.” I’m in New York so my Presidential or Senate votes don’t matter either. I do it anyway because it makes me feel better.

  7. MarkoMancuso says:

    Basil, what’s your last name? Even though I’m a voter in the key Commonwealth, of Pennsylvania, if we nominate Romney I’m casting a write-in vote for you.

    Could I write “Basil from that website” on the ballot?

  8. Son of Bob says:

    “* Thieves stole Obama’s teleprompters. When reached for comment, Obama’s reaction was, “I don’t know what to say.””

    brilliant!

  9. Crabby Old Bat says:

    “. . . know, wait, it was Anderson Cooper.” . . . “Well, no who also doesn’t have a job? Osama — because he’s dead!”

    Do we no why Frank thinks there is know reason not to use “no” and “know” interchangeably?

  10. Burmashave says:

    Please pardon my lack of humor ability, but the mere mention of the Kent State riots makes me phyically ill. Here’s the scoop on the riots:

    SDS “Revolution” at Kent
    Evidence that a Protester Fired First Shot

    The first one is long, but you’ve got the choice between one pitiful picture versus the entire story as it unfolded.

    Shooting protesters is bad for business, but my sympathy goes to the National Guardsmen, especially when Bernadine Dohrn and Jeffrey Rubin are planning and organizing violent riots that span several days; involve blackmail of store owners; lead to arson and destruction of stores, banks, barracks, school property and firefighting equipment; and injure multitudes of first responders.

    Somewhere else (I’ll spare you), there’s an account from a National Guardsman who describes how — after a weekend of pure violence — the handful of Guardsmen had essentially been trapped between a wall and an approaching mob of over 1,000 rioters.

  11. Burmashave says:

    Please dismoderate my comment, Frank.

    It prolly was my use of too many links or my mention of Bernadine Dohrn.

  12. ussjimmycarter says:

    I just lost 57 pounds and am down to my fighting weight of 196. I’m 6’2″, so if someone wants to pony up the 10 large, a photo of me with Moochelle will make her ass look Super Huge!!! That would be excellent! I will talk up the weight loss deal and how healthy eating and working out are the bomb and will suggest we both wear tights! Of course they will have to like totally photo-shop my huge package out of the picture…

  13. zzyzx says:

    Marco this is America and you can write anything you want on your ballot…just don’t expect it to be counted.

  14. Crabby Old Bat says:

    @ussjimmycarter: The huge package is the only incentive anyone would have to pony up the 10 large. Maybe you could stand sideways while Moo is seated, and block her face from the picture entirely. If she objects, ask her, “Who do you think you are, the President of Mongolia?”

  15. zzyzx says:

    Help I’m being held in the dark, dank, basement of a large ranch house in Crawford Texas…BO’s Teleprompter.

  16. FormerHostage says:

    Thieves stole Obama’s teleprompters.

    They actually found it in a strip club in Richmond slamming double-shots. Word is that it took three Secret Service Agents to drag it back. The whole time it was flashing, in ALL CAPS….

    “NO! NO! YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT IT’S LIKE TO BE VIOLTATED LIKE THIS. ALL THE LIES! MY GOD….ALL THE LIES! I COULD HAVE BEEN A SMART PHONE BUT NOOOOOOOOOOOO, I HAD TO GO INTO POLITICS….”

  17. EdthePastor says:

    Our president objects to 9-9-9? It must be a great plan then. lets see if you make between $35,500-83,600 a year then you pay 25% in federal income taxes. Under the 9-9-9 if you spend everything you make you are only paying 18%. So under the present tax code 25% is better than 18% according to Obama….

  18. DamnCat says:

    EdthePastor – Keep in mind that Obama is on the receiving end of those taxes. So, yes, he thinks 25% is better than 18%.

  19. DamnCat says:

    “…Nevada has a large Mormon population and apparently they cheer on any Mormon…”

    It’s almost like they’re a cult or something.

  20. Basil says:

    MarkoMancuso:
    What make you think “Basil” isn’t my last name?

    And, I do appreciate your vote.

  21. MarkoMancuso says:

    How is your last name pronounced again, Basil?

  22. Basil says:

    MarkoMancuso:
    Just like it’s spelled.

  23. Capitalist_B says:

    Frank — easier to comment here than on PJ Media — OWS is so close to having one rallying point if they’d just trim back, and it’s probably something good conservatives could love too. If they just said “no more bailouts” and that was it, then they’d probably be “Kent State” ready.

    On the other hand, sympathy really is EVERYTHING. The recent Zanesville, Ohio’s Occupation movement came to an abrupt screeching halt despite a sympathetic cause (not being caged up) after Sheriff Lutz authorized the use of lethal force on the protestors — a move he’s been widely applauded for by the locals, as it turns out that being considered unpredictably dangerously violent is not good for a protest cause.

  24. Jimmy says:

    Congrats, ussjimmycarter. But 57 pounds? That’s one for every state! What’d you do? Give up twinkies?

  25. ussjimmycarter says:

    I gave up the sweets, I don’t eat breakfast then I have an Ensure drink for lunch (which I could also have for breakfast if I wanted to) and then I eat a full meal at supper. The weight fell off me. My size 44 pants were too tight and I was NOT getting bigger ones! Now my 36″ jeans are loose on me! It feels good!

    But I still go to McDonalds and eat tons of fries and a Big Mac whenever I get an opportunity. It will give me nice memories once I’m in the “camp” awaiting word on my fate…a good gassing or a nice 18 hour work day…from this regime which hasn’t made a mistake since coming into office.

  26. VelvetElvis says:

    ussjimmycarter says:
    October 19th, 2011 at 2:21 pm

    You must be some kind of super human or something.
    If I had to stand that close to Moochelle, my package would invert.

  27. Stephen says:

    Basil B. Basil for President!

  28. Losing in Moderation links:

    […] first recorded sighting of hardcore Romneyites occurred at the Nevada debate. But they’re still as rare as Republicans who remained tuned in to CNN after the intramural […]

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