Nuke the News: You Can Trademark Incoherent Stupidity?

Posted on November 1, 2011 11:00 am

* So is there something to the claims of sexual harassment against Herman Cain? What we’ve been learning so far is how many details we don’t know. Who were the people who alleged sexual harassment? What was alleged? How much was the settlement? Are the people behind this all just anti-pizza extremists? Or Mitt Romney?

It is quite an October surprise — though certainly better to have it this October rather than next. Maybe, though, the harassment was just that Cain took a puff a of a cigarette and blew the smoke in the the women’s faces. He does seem to create work environments where people think that’s okay.

* So the Occupy Wall Street people were tired of being symbolically raped by bankers so they gathered together in Zuccotti park to actually get raped. Well, it’s all for a good cause… that no one can coherently explain.

* BTW, the demonstrators are trying to trademark the name “Occupy Wall Street”. It’s not a step towards coherency, but it’s nice to know some people there are concerned about capitalism. They can’t trademark “twinkles” and “down twinkles”, though, because those belong to all of humanity.

* As we’re hurtling towards nominating Romney, it is interesting that Republicans can never nominate anyone they’re enthused about. The left are always shrieking about how the GOP is going to nominate some right-wing extremist, but we can never actually do that while they often do nominate left-wing nuts for president. What Republicans always end up with is some milquetoast establishment candidate. The early states that decide the primary almost seem to have been chosen at random, but you have to wonder if there is actually some RINO genius behind them considering the results. Well, can we defy expectations and nominate someone like Herman Cain? He might harass us.

* Studies show that constantly praising your child as smart might actually harm him in the long run as he won’t have the drive to succeed and expect everything to come easily. Hey, who is someone we know who is constantly praised as smart yet seems to be unable to do anything useful as an adult. He lives in a big house. A white one. You see where I’m going with this?

* The View wants to host a Republican debate. Might be a good idea to attend. One could really ensure himself the nomination if he just locks up the shrill harpy vote.

Plus, little chance of Herman Cain harassing any of the panel.

* Wisdom of the Day: “Kid, if you don’t know whether your Batman costume is pre or post reboot continuity, you don’t deserve candy. Also, Batman doesn’t cry.” -Sean Thomason

* Only fourteen more days until my book, Obama: The Greatest President in the History of Everything, comes out. How are all of you doing on saving up your $1.99 for it? Almost there? If not, you might want to think about taking up a temp job to help earn the money.

I hear about how in the poorest countries they live on two dollars a day. So no matter how bad off you are, all you need to do is not eat for a day and you should have the money. Trust me; it’s worth it.

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22 Responses to “Nuke the News: You Can Trademark Incoherent Stupidity?”

  1. Son of Bob says:

    “Studies show that constantly praising your child as smart might actually harm him in the long run as he won’t have the drive to succeed and expect everything to come easily.”

    You mean, at some point several of them will begin to gather in parks demanding people give them things for free because they don’t understand the concept of working hard to achieve results instead of just getting a gold star for showing up?

  2. Crabby Old Bat says:

    Who were the people who alleged sexual harassment? What was alleged?

    I have worked with people who considered it “harassment” if you weren’t as shrilly feminist as they were. Hostile work environment!

  3. Ernie Loco says:

    Studies show that constantly praising your child as smart might actually harm him in the long run as he won’t have the drive to succeed and expect everything to come easily

    I think if someone has to tell you how smart you are, that’s a pretty good indictation that you’re not actually all that bright.

    I know a lot of very smart people (engineers, chemsits, physicists, PhDs, etc), and I can’t think of a time when I’ve heard anyone complimented on their intelligence.

    I have however, heard a lot of these smart people ridiculed for their lack of intelligence (“You idiot, the Fermi levels can’t be that far apart.” “You think Maxwell’s equations just don’t apply to this situation?” “Did you fail ECE503 or something?” “What are you, an English major?” “Neutrinos don’t have a charge, that’s why they’re called neutrinos.”)

  4. Burmashave says:

    The truly sick thing about the Zuccatti Park Squatters (ZPS — pronounced “zips”) is that not only have sexual assaults and rapes occurred, but also the squatters have actively prevented law enforcement from taking any action.

    Heard at Zuccutti Park:

    I am a radical feminist, and I approve of this rape.

  5. zzyzx says:

    If (among other things) the left can trademark…It’s for the Kids™, Bush’s Fault™, Climate Change™ (formally known as Global Warming™), TEA Party Racist™, etc. etc. then why cant you trademark Occupy Wall Street?

  6. Burmashave says:

    In the too good too miss category:

    …drunks I spoke with last week told me they’d been encouraged to “take it to Zuccotti” by officers who’d found them drinking in other parks…

    Also from NYC’s finest:

    “He’s got a right to express himself, you’ve got a right to express yourself,” …when asked to intervene with troublemakers inside the park, including a clearly disturbed man screaming and singing wildly at 3 a.m. for the second straight night.

    - While complaining about the homeless people who were eating ZPS food, one of the ZPS organizers said of the other squatters, “It’s unbelievable the sense of entitlement they have.”

    - Oh, and on a good night there, they’ve got mebbe 100 protesters but 79 community working groups. I may not be a survivalist, but the first thing I’d do if I were cold and starving would be to form 80 committees.

  7. Brian The Adequate says:

    “Plus, little chance of Herman Cain harassing any of the panel.”

    Did Elizabeth Hassleback leave the show?

  8. DamnCat says:

    “Plus, little chance of Herman Cain harassing any of the panel.”

    He could sing a hymn and make their heads explode.

  9. plentyobailouts says:

    Zucchini park — Ugly feminists raped in a park named for a phallic symbol

    Zuccotti Park rapist files stalking report on ugly feminist.

    Cops point muggers and drug dealers to Zuccotti park, Drug dealers flee foul stench of freeloaders.

    Homeless occupy west side of park upwind from smelly marxists. Marxists look to trademark stench.

    Mover and Shaker on phone to city official: Do something! It smells like a marxist infested new jersey out there!

  10. ussjimmycarter says:

    It’s better to tell your kid he’s a retard when he acts like a retard. That way he is encouraged to not act like a retard. If he acts smart, tell him he is good! I know…retard is not suppose to be used…THAT is the root of the problem. Kids act like retards all the time and should be told that they are retards more!!! Nobody wants to be a retard!!! Well, except Jimmy…but he can’t help it. He was born a retard and shall remain a retard for the rest of his retarded life!!!

  11. Jimmy says:

    “If not, you might want to think about taking up a temp job to help earn the money.”

    Frank, so far, I’ve saved $0.42. Do you have any temp job postings? (I do very good troll and spam cleaning and will check back often for keep-up-the-good-work postings!)

    Damn, you’re gonna make me get a PC version of Kindle, or whatever it’s called. It sure isn’t a real book reader. Real books have measurable mass.

  12. TheRoyalFamily says:

    Sorry FrankJ, Amazon doesn’t take the change I get off the street.

  13. Crabby Old Bat says:

    You can trademark incoherent stupidity?

    You betcha: http://michellemalkin.com/2010/09/15/the-new-look-democrats/

  14. storm1911 says:

    I am waiting for the Bantam paperback version of Frank’s new book.

    Did anyone else note the only network to be allowed an interview by the Politico guys was pmsnbc? So it must be true, as pmsnbc is the Pravda (truth in Russian) of the air.

  15. DamnCat says:

    @ storm1911

    I’ll wait for the Penguin Classics edition of Frank’s book.

  16. Dohtimes says:

    Never judge a book by it’s cover DamnCat, remember how disappointed you were with To Kill A Mockingbird.

  17. Jimmy says:

    ussjimmycarter is an Occupy Retard… an “Occutard.” You know why? Because he’s occupied by Hillary Clinton!

  18. DamnCat says:

    @ Dohtimes

    Too true. And Trout Fishing in America was big let down as well.

  19. Rubeus says:

    Who’s going to pirate the Kindle version and share it on a torrent site? :D

  20. Penultimatum says:

    As we’re hurtling towards nominating Romney oblivion, it is interesting that Republicans can never nominate anyone they’re enthused about. The left are always shrieking about how the GOP is going to nominate some right-wing extremist, but we can never actually do that while they often do nominate left-wing nuts for president.

    Frank J.- When we force you to run nominate you in 2016, you are going to have a heck of a mess to fix. Start studying.

  21. 4of7 says:

    Herman Cain is accused of sexual harassment and his campaign gets over $400,000 in two days!
    Who leaked the story?
    Who benefits?
    Dang! Cain is even smarter than I thought!

  22. Mxymaster says:

    You know, e-books in those poor countries only cost .15, which is only 13.3% of the daily wage. Of course, they can’t afford Kindles or iPads–they only make ‘em, can’t buy ‘em–so it doesn’t do them much good. Still, Frank ought to split the difference and charge us $1.07. Jimmy would be that much closer.

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