Before his first official campaign rally in Ohio, President Obama predicted an “overflow” crowd at the 20,000-seat venue.
5,000 of those seats went unfilled.
But that’s OK. There are some perfectly legitimate explanations:
1) They weren’t “empty”, they were “sitting-ready”.
2) No one sitting? Obviously this means that Michelle’s “Let’s Move” initiative is working.
3) Boehner’s from Ohio, so everyone was outside having a smoke in his honor.
4) They were all reserved for Obama’s many composite girlfriends. Who totally exist.
5) Shouldn’t have sold that block of tickets to the American Kennel Club.
6) Still damp from the Bieber concert
7) “20,000 men enter, 15,000 men leave.” Thunderdome™ v0.1 (Beta)
8) Check the closet. Bill Clinton might be “interviewing” interns.
9) Ticket-holder #15,001 – Michael Moore – jammed in the doorway. You’d be surprised how often this happens.
10) Obama’s audience was hand-selected to be representative of the entire American population, so 25% of them were out watching “The Avengers.”
11) This is Obama’s base we’re talking about. Maybe they had trouble catching a cab from the cemetary.
Still, no one’s been able to delve to the bottom of this situation’s TRUE quandry:
Why were 15,000 of those seats full?