Nuke the News: Obama Is Now Gay

Posted on May 14, 2012 11:00 am

* I have a new New York Post column! I worry that our country’s problems are just too boring to focus on and muse about what kind of warlord I’ll bee.

I mean, most of these are the same problems we had back in the ’70s. No one solved them then, because they were distracted by the president being a bitten by a rabbit.

Read it. Discuss it. Like it on Facebook.

* Obama is teh ghey!

Apparently Newsweek and Time are in competition for most insane cover story, but I still don’t know if that justifies hiring the mentally unbalanced, Palin womb-obsessed Andrew Sullivan. It might be possible that Obama could carefully play his gay marriage support in a way that won’t hurt him, but his idiotic supporters will make that hard.

And maybe Newsweek should fully embrace it’s new freak show vibe and instead of charging $4 an issue they should charge a nickel a gander.

* Obama has a new attack ad on all the layoffs at Bain… that happened after Romney left the company. So if I can get this straight, Romney is responsible for job losses when he no longer worked at a business, but Obama isn’t responsible for job losses while he is actually president?

Why are we even considering reelecting Obama when he this objectively bad at his job. It makes a mockery of the whole point of having elections. Only dictatorships are supposed to be stuck with the same awful leader no matter how badly he performs.

* The co-founder of Facebook has renounced his American citizenship to save on taxes before the IPO. It’s pretty bad when taxes chase people away from being citizens. I don’t know if I could ever renounce my citizenship, even if it was to avoid absurd taxes. Well, maybe I could lose my citizenship to dodge the taxes and then I’d sneak in illegally.

* Wisdom of the Day from Dan McLaughlin:

Real talk: Obama has done nothing that would warrant impeaching him, trying him for treason, or re-electing him.

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18 Responses to “Nuke the News: Obama Is Now Gay”

  1. FormerHostage says:

    I just KNEW Michelle was a guy in drag!

  2. FormerHostage says:

    Now that he’s thrust himself into this gay issue he will become the butt of many a joke. But given his firm resolve I’m sure he’ll make it over this hump.

  3. DamnCat says:

    “Wait a second…I’m the beard? I thought he was the beard.”
    – Michelle Obama –

  4. Burmashave says:

    Didja notice that’s the whitiest-white photo of Obama ever? These things don’t happen by accident. Has Newsweek decided that he can’t be both black and teh gey?

  5. Son of Bob says:

    So, let’s review. A caucasion named Clinton was “The First Black President.” A supposed heterosexual with a wife (albeit a nasty one) and two kids is “The First Gay President.” And, a white woman who’s ancestor was an indian hunter wants to be “The First Indian Senator In Massachusetts.” Liberals are idiots.

  6. Iowa Jim says:

    So if I can get this straight, Romney is responsible for job losses when he no longer worked at a business, but Obama isn’t responsible for job losses while he is actually president?

    I do have to admit that there’s a certain symmetry there, since the lefties also want us to be concerned more with how Romney spends his own money than with how Obama spends ours.

  7. Mxymaster says:

    Here’s the proven method to cheating on your taxes and staying a citizen:

    1) Cheat on taxes.
    2) Flee to country with no extradition treaty and fun ways to spend your loot.
    3) Spend a hunk of that loot – through an intermediary – to a democrat president (you don’t have to be too clever about the laundering; in fact, make it pretty clear so the big guy doesn’t forget who butters the bread).
    4) On his last day in office: Presidential Pardon!

    Works like a charm.

  8. silverfiddle says:

    Well, as Son of Bob, observed, Clinton took the “First Black President” title, so I guess First Gay President was all that was left for Obama…

  9. SineWaveII says:

    What do you mean “now”?

  10. Harvey says:

    SF – First Woman President is still open, and he’s definitely got the silky soft hands for it.

  11. NO_MO_BAMA says:

    The co-founder of Facebook has renounced his American citizenship….

    So now you can become an illegal immigrant just by saying you’re no longer American?? Where do I sign up? I already do a job that most Americans are incapable of doing so I think no laws should apply to me either.

  12. zzyzx says:

    Everyone knows it’s Bush’s Fault™. Bush is responsable for job losses during Obama’s presidency.

  13. island girl says:

    I love your article in today’s NY Post Frank ! You are the man !

  14. Rignerd says:

    Hey dude, your ghelo is showing.

  15. Tommy the Towelhead says:

    Looks like he’ll be bringing Barney Frank back in through the back door.

  16. IMAO » Blog Archive » Liberal Minority Identification Accuracy Swings, Gets Fourth Strike links:

    […] Praise! to Son of Bob for the […]

  17. IMAO » Blog Archive » Rejected “Obama Likes Gay Marriage” Newsweek Covers links:

    […] so drunken-frat-boy-at-a-toddler’s-birthday-party out-of-touch that they thought the “gaylo” cover they finally ran with was the cream of the crop. (No Ratings Yet)  Loading […]

  18. IMAO » Blog Archive » Obama, Gay Marriage, and the Gay DC Superhero links:

    […] According to Newsweek, Obama’s the first gay President. […]

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