Nuke the News: Forcing You to Understand

Posted on June 1, 2012 11:00 am

* I love Bloomberg’s explanation for the soda ban. He’s “forcing you to understand.” Now, if only we had a way to force him to understand what a silly mockery he’s become.

In America — this country — politicians are supposed to be servants. They don’t make us understand anything or make us do anything. If anything, New Yorkers should be telling him how to eat. He does work for them, and thus it’s in their interest to keep him healthy, so they should be dictating what he can eat and how much he should exercise per day. That would be just and fine in our American system. We tell politicians what to do, not the other way around. How do we make people like Bloomberg understand that? The answer: a long exile to Antarctica to think things over. We really need to start working on my idea to turn Antarctica into a place to exile politicians.

* Romney held a press conference outside the shuttered Solyndra building, using it as a symbol of Obama’s failure. This is why I’m already liking Romney much more than McCain: He really wants to be president, so he is not afraid to attack and attack and attack. And really, what more do we want after suffering through the Obama presidency than someone constantly and very publicly pointing out what an absolute failure that Obama idiot is. Maybe a Romney presidency won’t be that great, but a complete rejection of the Obama presidency is needed to heal our country. And for the lols.

* A bill to ban sex-selection abortions was defeated in the House (it needed two-thirds vote for the fast track). The main response from Democrats is to pretend it wasn’t a problem — as they do with any suggestion of horrific consequence from abortion. So how does this fit in the war on women? Is allowing baby girls to be aborted for being girls pro-Women because abortion is so absolutely sacred to everything feminist? Just remember in the War on Women, only one side is causing actual casualties.

* John Edwards, not guilty on one count, mistrial on five other counts. I guess he’s good then; he should definitely run for office then.

I still don’t understand how anyone fell for such on obvious scumbag. Clips of Edwards campaigning in 2004 should be used in training videos for voters, “This is what a slimeball sounds like. Do not vote for people like this.”

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22 Responses to “Nuke the News: Forcing You to Understand”

  1. zzyzx says:

    Mayor Bloomberg of NYC wants to ban 32 oz sodas in NYC. His theory being…most people are too stupid to order a 16 oz soda and after drinking it, order a re-fill. Some day Bloomberg will be inducted into the Democrat Hall of Fame. Meanwhile Gov Moonbeam in California is gnashing his teeth because he didn’t think of it first..

  2. Jimmy says:

    “I still don’t understand how anyone fell for such on obvious scumbag.”

    I still don’t understand how anyone fell for Clinton or Obama.

    And I’m wondering how Sarah K. fell for you! (T-3 days and counting…get your abuse ready, folks.)

  3. Jimmy says:

    Holy socks, I got moderated! I forgot the umlaut. Note to self: don’t use the word scümbag without a replacement characher!

  4. JAGernaut says:

    I know of a couple things Bloomberg should eat, but at least one of them I won’t type here…

    When people order two 16oz cups of “deadly” sugary drinks (fruit juice actually has more sugar than soda, but it’s ok because it’s “natural”) out of spite for this idiotic law, and the already out of control trash problem becomes that much worse, maybe they can force feed Bloomberg the extra waste.

    This accomplishes two goals: It should help a bit with the garbage (disposing of physical trash and it would be kind of hard for Bloomberg to spew more intellectual trash with a feeding tube down his throat) and eventually, they could harvest his fattened liver as foie gras for the discriminating LSD cannibals.

  5. zzyzx says:

    For me there is one redeeming factor in this whole Edwards situation…he and his lawyers just helped the Holder Justice Department eat a giant s**t sandwich, and as far as I’m concerned that’s a good thing.

  6. Choey says:

    Why would you want to pollute Antarctica with exiled politicians. I think it would be much better to exile them to the moon…just before we nuke it…

  7. Scott says:

    First, they came for my large soda; and I did nothing…

  8. Dohtimes says:

    People in the know, know that this thing we call ice makes up most of the difference in drink sizes when served in cups and glasses. Sodas are such high profit margin items that banning large sizes will make price hikes elsewhere a necessity.

  9. Mxymaster says:

    Edwards is such a human oil slick that I am shocked that any juries even fell for his schtick. Must have wrangled it so only “Oprah” watchers could be on juries for his cases.

  10. Son of Bob says:

    Liberal elites never fail to amaze me. I can just imagine the Founding Fathers sitting around the table when a moron from New York spouts that “we must force them to understand.” I wonder who would have punched him first…I’m guessing General Washington.

  11. Son of Bob says:

    “John Edwards, not guilty on one count, mistrial on five other counts. I guess he’s good then; he should definitely run for office then.”

    One law for thee, another for me. American law doesn’t apply to Democrat politicians and movie stars…just you and me.

  12. plentyobailouts says:

    And some say we won the cold war.

    Its really hard to feel sorry for the people of the eastern bloc. They brought this on themselves. So I will sip on 54oz soda and chuckle.

    Isn’t this ban racists? It prevents the black women from having that moochelle butt. What ever became of freedom of expression?

    Since the prisons are already over crowded, where will they put the Big Gulp smugglers?

  13. Anthony M says:

    Personally, I hope this soda ban passes nationwide. Not because I hate soda, but because it will likely result in a 1920’s-style Prohibition. Just imagine bootleggers waiting under cover of darkness to bring a crate of homemade Mountain Dew to the local speakeasy. That’ll look good in the history books! XD
    That, and it will give me an excuse to dress like Nucky Thompson.

  14. Burmashave says:

    Well, here’s the deal. The women of NOW want women to have the right to not have women.

  15. DamnCat says:

    Who do you root for when it’s John Edwards vs. Eric Holder’s Justice Dept.?

    “Hey, Sophie! Can you help me out here…?”

  16. Burmashave says:

    @11. plentyobailouts: Winning the Cold War is much too controversial to speak of. The Poles requested that Obama present Lech Walesa the medal on behalf of Karski. Said Obama, after asking for waffles, “Nope, too controversial.”

    In Obama-World:
    – Lech Walesa, hero for democracy: Too Controversial to Appear with President
    – Chair of Democratic Socialists of America: Deserves Medal

    The name most commonly used for Obama in Poland is balwan. According to a friend of Polish descent, the meaning is idiomatic in that balwan literally translates to snowman; however, it is used to mean something closer to nit wit, dunce, empty head, etc.

    Incidentally, among other WWII dead suffered by my friend’s family, her uncle was executed in the Katyn Forest. Her feelings run deep.

  17. Doubling down on petty tyranny « Blog of the Nightfly links:

    […] of play on the blogosphere and Twitter on this subject: the Swillers, Morgan Freeberg, and IMAO for starters.  Good.  I hope Bloomberg is driven from the field in shame.  It’s high time […]

  18. Iowa Jim says:

    Clips of Edwards campaigning in 2004 should be used in training videos for voters, “This is what a slimeball sounds like. Do not vote for people like this.”

    It’s appropriate to do that with just about any Democrat, isn’t it?

  19. DamnCat says:

    Burmashave – Thanks for the link…

    The Poles wanted Lech Walesa to receive the medal on Karski’s behalf, but the White House nixed the choice. Last year, during Mr. Obama’s visit to Poland, the hero of Solidarity refused to attend a large gathering to meet the younger leader. Mr. Walesa felt entitled to a tete-a-tete. Administration officials told Polish journalists that Mr. Walesa’s presence was too “political” for this week’s occasion. Poles read something else into it: Mr. Obama holds grudges. The counter-snub was the talk of Poland last week.

    What kind of jerk would turn down a chance to meet Lech Walesa? Even if you were too busy at the time you could set up a meeting later – have him over to the White House.

    You’d think that would be one of the best things about being president – being able to meet people like Walesa who was instrumental in bringing down communism in Europe. But maybe that’s another grudge Obama has against him.

  20. adagioforstrings says:

    About the only good thing Bloomberg has done is leave the Republican party so that we don’t have to be blamed for his fascist goofiness. His over reaching micro management has made me seriously reconsider libertarian arguments to legalize drugs.

  21. IMAO » Blog Archive » Forget Hizzoner the Mayor. Here’s Bloomberg’s New Job Title links:

    […] [reference link] (No Ratings Yet)  Loading … […]

  22. IMAO » Blog Archive » Did You Know They Made a Movie About Mayor Bloomberg? links:

    […] [ref 1,ref 2] (No Ratings Yet)  Loading … […]

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