More Charm Than a Box of That Cereal With the Leprechaun on it

[High Praise! to Stupid is a Five Letter Word]

I almost feel sorry for the left, because their job is to make people hate THIS guy:


[SIAFLW direct link]

Yeah… good luck with that.

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A Picture Making Plain the Distinct Pattern in Obama’s Behavior

[High Praise! to After Math]

[Original image]

Ya know, I’m not sure what that next rung would be.

Dog-eater, maybe?

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A Better Idea for Commemorating Obama

The city of Chicago is placing a plaque in Hyde Park to commemorate the location where Barack & Michelle Obama shared their first kiss.

Considering what he’s done to the economy, maybe they should put a fish wrapped in a newspaper there.

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Evidence Check: Is Obama a Uniter or a Divider?

[High Praise! to Hope n’ Change Cartoons]

in his best “aw shucks” manner, and with Michelle sitting at his side (apparently wearing a tablecloth from an Italian restaurant), Obama said “I don’t think you or anybody who’s been watching the campaign would say that in any way we have tried to divide the country. We’ve always tried to bring the country together.”

Except when he’s threatening to throw bankers to the people with pitchforks, clearing the legal path for Occupy Wall Street protesters to rail against capitalism, instructing the Justice Department not to prosecute New Black Panthers who threaten white voters, declaring that Republicans are waging a “war on women,” calling people of faith “bitter clingers,” having his Department of Homeland Security label veterans as potential terrorists, calling fiscal conservatives “hostage takers,” creating “blacks only” programs to improve schooling, and on and on.

Seriously, Barack Obama is more enthusiastic about dividing people than Leatherface was in the Texas Chainsaw Massacre. And he used power tools!

The entire rant is an excellent read, plus there’s 4 cartoons you’ll want to check out.

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2012 Is About a Clash of Ideas: Illustrated

[High Praise! to The Astute Bloggers]

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You’ve Been Judged!

Keln of Nuking Politics picked his favorite punchlines to “Hilliary asked to be VP. Obama said…

Click here to see if you made the cut.

If you did, you should probably email him about becoming a guest blogger there.

If you didn’t, he’s got another straight line for you to practice on.

Keep trying. No one likes a quitter.

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Link of the Day: 2nd Amendment 1, Home Invading Goblin 0

[High Praise! to Common Sense & Wonder]

ALABAMA WOMAN SHOOTS HOME INTRUDER TO PROTECT HERSELF AND HER AX- AND KNIFE-WIELDING DAUGHTERS

Excerpt:

An Alabama woman said she was forced to shoot an intruder that broke into her home this week in order to protect herself and her daughters.

Martha Lewis of Dora, Ala. told WVTM-TV it was about 3 a.m. Tuesday morning when she heard a loud noise, which turned out to be someone kicking in her door. Lewis said she called the police and grabbed her gun, then went to her daughters’ room and told them each to get something to defend themselves with. She said one grabbed an ax and one got a butcher knife.

They were at the top of the stairs when they saw a man standing there at the bottom.

“I knew when he stepped on the landing that I would have to shoot him,” Lewis told the station. “He starts like coming up the stairs and he said, ‘would you shoot me?’ And I said ‘I don’t want to have to but I will.'”

Ignoring her warnings, the man kept coming – and that’s when Lewis said she fired.

[Think you have a link that’s IMAO-worthy? Send it to harvolson@gmail.com. If I use your link, you will receive High Praise! (assuming you remember to put your name in the email)]

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Things Toure Thinks Are Racist

[High Praise! to iOwnTheWorld]

Fun little Twitter hashtag that’s getting some play: #ThingsToureThinksAreRacist
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@billhobbs: People who vote against Obama because they disagree with him, but NOT people who vote for him because he’s black

@iowahawkblog: Nielsen ratings.

@benshapiro: The cotton in a bottle of aspirin.

@billhobbs: Saltines.

@Josh_Painter: The Black Hills of South Dakota, The Red Rocks of Colorado & The White Cliffs of Dover

@amyvrwc: queso blanco

@michellemalkin: A, E, I, O, and “YOU PEOPLE!”

@JasonMattera: Hockey is incredibly racist. A bunch of white dudes slapping around a black puck.

@KerryPicket: The White House

@tylerhunter23: White water rafting

@SooperMexican: White people who quote him using the N-word.

@tylerhunter23: white out

@benshapiro: Whiteboards. They’ve taken the place of blackboards in too many classrooms.

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I’ll let @derekahunter have the last word:

@derekahunter: I’d say @Toure deserves to be ignored & allowed to fade into obscurity but he’s on MSNBC, so he has.

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Wisdom of the Day: Argue Bizkit Japanese Babies

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Clarifying for Liberals: the Difference Between Hate and Love

[High Praise! to Liberal Logic 101]

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Obama Is Everywhere

First Obama had edited himself into the president’s biographies, and now he’s edited the State Department facts sheets for different countries to add himself. Next, I guess he’ll take the different presidential portraits and paint himself in the background waving. And he’ll replace the White House china with Obama commemorative plates. And maybe he’ll just replace the presidential histories with a fictional series of short stories where he obtains a time machine and goes back and solves all the previous presidents’ problems. Eventually, Obama will be everywhere in the White House — except for the history of the the last four years. That was all Bush’s fault.

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Highway to Hell

Last Exit!

Cross-Posted at America is an Obamanation!

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UPDATE: Linked by The Jawa Report

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Straight Line of the Day: Batman Has the Bat Signal. What Signal Would Obama Use?

Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.

Batman has the Bat Signal. What signal would Obama use?

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8 Ideas to Make Biden Appear Smarter

So Obama added Biden to his ticket in 2008 to give it more gravitas, which was just one of many big mistakes to follow. Obama, being a dummy himself, assumed that since Biden had been in the Senate for decades, he must know something — when actually suggests the opposite of that. Now it would be too big a deal to dump the lunkhead, so they’re forced to just try and manage him until election day. So to help out, here are some ideas to make Biden look smarter.

IDEAS TO MAKE BIDEN APPEAR SMARTER

* Make sure his mouth is always full of a whole bag of Big League Chew so he is unable to talk.

* Have him wear thick glasses, a mortarboard, and an “I’m with stupid” t-shirt where the arrow isn’t pointed at himself.

* Somehow get him a prop newspaper to hold that on the outside is the Wall Street Journal and the inside is nothing but Marmaduke so he’ll be entertained.

* Give him an earpiece that feeds him things to say and a collar that shocks him when he strays off topic.

* Have him always carry around a bunch of books. To encourage this, hollow out the books and fill them with gummy worms.

* Put dark sunglasses on him to hide his vacant stare.

* Promise him if he’s quiet and doesn’t make any embarrassing statements, he’ll finally get that rabbit farm.

* Have him wear a Paul Ryan mask.

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Random Thoughts: Free Joe Biden

Seen this video of crazy clips from The Wicker Man? Probably could do something similar with Biden speeches.

Just got a fundraising email from Joe Biden. Subject: “me good VP”

Much like Obama, Joe Biden has written numerous memoirs. All pop up books.

Joe Biden is okay. The White House just released a picture of him wearing a captain’s hat made from today’s newspaper.

If Obama did dump Biden, I assume that would very much resemble the scene from the end of Of Mice and Men.

So the left-wing are turning violent against right-wing groups they assure themselves will one day turn violent?

Really? They’re sending them to jail for “hooliganism”? I assume that sounds less ridiculous in Russian.

You can be a serious person who cares about big issues affecting our country, or you can obsess on Romney’s taxes. Guess which one the president is?

President doesn’t seem to be working out so well for Obama, but I’d bet he’d be an awesome White House tour guide.

The right has the hate groups. The left just has a bunch of independent hate enthusiasts.

When watching an 80s sitcom, you have to remember the subtext that at any moment the Soviets could launch a nuclear attack.

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