Harry Reid Accused of Piloting UFO Around DC Area

Posted on August 2, 2012 4:06 pm

WASHINGTON (AP) – After numerous UFO sightings in the DC area last June, spokesmen from the Patuxent Naval Air Station revealed that it was actually just an experimental drone aircraft. Although the Navy claims that the X-47B is flown completely by its computer and has no personnel aboard, a quick search of the internet by ABC’s Brian Ross proved the military’s cover story to be false.

“No evidence to suggest Harry Reid disembarked his UFO long enough to meet with Obama and inappropriately touch young people.”

“There’s a ‘Hairy Reed’ of Washington DC, page on Twitter,” said Ross, “and there’s a tweet here talking about him flying a UFO. Now, we don’t know if this is the same Harry Reid. But it’s Harry Reid of Washington, DC. This might be significant.”

As further evidence, the Washington Post cited “a phone call from some guy who once read cowboy poetry,” but declined to identify him. He was, however, quoted as saying, “Harry Reid! He’s in the sky! He’s everywhere! HE’S EVERYWHERE!”

The Washington Post’s Ed O’Keefe said the conclusion was “obvious”.

“The responsibility of the media is to report stories no matter what they’re based on, for example truth, or rumors, or the loudest of my little head-voices. And based on the deranged rantings of an anonymous lunatic, we must assume that Harry Reid is a space alien bent on global destruction who does strafing runs over the DC area for kicks.”

“Also,” concluded O’Keefe, “according to a recent Twitter hashtag, Reid may also be a pederast. Now we don’t know if it’s the same Harry Reid, but this might be significant.”

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10 Responses to “Harry Reid Accused of Piloting UFO Around DC Area”

  1. blarg says:

    Piloting UFO? Big deal!

    I have it on good authority that Obama raped 6 women.

  2. Zach says:

    53% of Americans don’t pay income tax. Isn’t Harry going to offend his base if he starts talking about that like it’s a bad thing?

  3. zzyzx says:

    So Harry says 17 old white men are going to celebrate over breakfast with Carl Rove right after the election? Complete with slobbering and bad teeth? Isn’t Harry an old white man? And if he is…why is he making statements that sound like something the leader of the New Black Panther Party would say? I ask these questions because someone called me and said he knew someone who says Harry is actually an old woman.

  4. Dohtimes says:

    John Roberts just ruled that it wasn’t pederasty, it was a tax.

    Reid spends most of his working days lobbying Obama to extend his class warfare to Mrs. Simpkins 3rd grade class at a nearby grade school.

  5. Jimmy says:

    The man is not capable of piloting anything.

  6. Manolo says:

    When’s the pederast going to talk about his friendship with John Wayne Gacy? Huh?

  7. suicidal idiot says:

    The UFO has a “Free Candy” sign painted on the side.

  8. zzyzx says:

    UFO’s are real…Harry Reid’s imaginary.

  9. Lactosa Tolerenta says:

    Is there a reason why Senator Reid refuses to comment on his conduct with children? Not that he’s owes us an explanation, but he owes it to his victims.

  10. Lactosa Tolerenta says:

    Manolo, just try to locate one Reid-Gacy photo. The internet has been cleansed of any trace of them.

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