[We're giving Keln of Nuking Politics a chance to impress you by letting him try his hand at guest-posting at IMAO. Shower him with bacon or tofu in the comments as appropriate.]
So Romney came out today and told everyone that he has, in fact, paid his taxes for the past 10 years, and then he said that Harry Reid should now reveal his mysterious source. But as we all know, anonymous sources are anonymous for a reason. Usually because they might lose their position or job, or maybe even get targeted for an old gangster-style whacking. In Reid’s case, it is more likely that he doesn’t want anyone to know that he gets his tips from his imaginary friend, Koko the giant sock monkey.
But, that whole business is really irrelevant, and Romney and Ryan seem to understand that, which is why they are starting to whip out the white boards and do math in front of a live audience. It sounds risky…doing actual math in front of people during a campaign. I mean, math for most people is a real buzz-kill. Especially for people on the left. Math is too objective for them to really “dig”. They might like imaginary numbers though.
See, Romney, who is Mr. Business, and Ryan, who is Mr. Numbers, are kinda like those nerds in high school that were on the debate team, the glee club, and worst of all, the Math Team. It doesn’t get nerdier than that folks. And Obama is like, Mr. Cool. He can’t really add 2 +2, and doesn’t even know how many states there are, but he is cool, man. The mom jeans moment notwithstanding.
I guess that makes the American public like, high school kids or something. It’s just natural to say “haha, Romney is a dork.”, and stuff him in a locker with Harry Reid and his sock monkey when you’re too cool for school. But it’s all fun and games until…the big math exam comes up.
Then what happens? Can the cool kids save you then? Nope. That’s when you start letting the dorks sit with you at the lunch table in exchange for some study help for that big math test. Because, you’re too cool to know how to do math. And the school Quarterback, Obama…well he doesn’t know anything about math either. He’ll still pick on you for sitting with the dorks, but he’s going to fail his math test.
Maybe if we’re lucky, he’ll get kicked off the football team too.