Would This Punishment Be Too Harsh?

Federal investigators said that Health and Human Services Secretary Kathleen Sebelius violated federal law by campaigning for President Obama.

I’m thinking they should punish her by repealing Obamacare for everyone except her.

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Your Guide to Understanding the Liberal Media

[High Praise! to Irritable Pundit]

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Obama Could’ve Prevented This

Scientists are now theorizing that it was global warming that killed off the dinosaurs.

Makes sense. They didn’t have a single Chevy Volt back then.

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You’ve Been Judged!

Keln of Nuking Politics picked his favorite punchlines to “When asked about rising gas prices, Obama…“.

Click here to see if you made the cut.

If you did, you should probably email him about becoming a guest blogger there.

If you didn’t, he’s got another straight line for you to practice on.

Keep trying. No one likes a quitter.

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Video: How to Make a Man Out of a Liberal Arts Major

[High Praise! to Theo Spark]

The premise of this short documentary is sorta like Dirty Jobs, following around a bunch of guys doing a hard job that they love.

The pleasure of watching this video comes in seeing the light slowly come on in the film-geek documentarian’s head of why a man would love a hard job.

It’s like watching a baby take his first steps.

[YouTube direct link] (Viewer #77,573)

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Link of the Day: 20 Things Democrats Say In Private

[High Praise! to The Looking Spoon]

20 Things Democrats Say In Private

I really like #6.

[Think you have a link that’s IMAO-worthy? Send it to harvolson@gmail.com. If I use your link, you will receive High Praise! (assuming you remember to put your name in the email)]

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A Moment With Joe Biden: Cable

[by Son of Bob]

And now, a moment with Joe Biden…

BIDEN: …but, a few weeks ago when we were out campaigning we made a stop at the Time Warner Cable factory in Charlotte, North Carolina… in fact, we spent a few days at that company, I believe because they have just so many employees. It was a big, beautiful building, full of hardworking Time Warner employees. Unfortunately, I wasn’t able to get a tour to see where they made the cable… they were so busy, God bless ’em. But I met so many wonderful people who work there, and they insisted that Barack and I both make speeches… they even built a stage just for our visit. And, practically everyone I met in that company said they were voting for Barack. Almost everyone! And I tell ya, it was just so heartwarming. Unfortunately, many of the people who actually work on the assembly line weren’t able to attend; it was mainly supervisors. A great many of the employees that I talked to, I’d ask them what they do there and they’d say “delegate,” so I can only imagine how many people actually work under all those supervisors at just that one plant. So, the next time the folks on the other side try to tell you that Barack’s not putting people back to work, don’t you believe it. Just tell them to ask the folks at that big Time Warner plant in Charlotte…

This has been a moment with Joe Biden.

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Wisdom of the Day: Messina Redistribute Lincoln Molester

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Old Obama Quote, New Context (Scary!)

[High Praise! to the Puppy Blender]

[reference link]

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Obama Confused About the Debt on Letterman

So Obama was on David Letterman’s show and got a bit confused about the debt. Here’s the transcript:

LETTERMAN: So I hear the country is in debt or something.

OBAMA: Huh? I hadn’t heard about that.

LETTERMAN: No, I’m pretty sure it’s true.

OBAMA: That doesn’t sound right. We can print our own money. I don’t know why we’d be in debt.

LETTERMAN: No, I think it was like some trillions or something.

OBAMA: That’s not even a real word. You must have your facts wrong, Leno.

LETTERMAN: No, I’m David Letterman.

OBAMA: No, I’m quite sure Leno is the one in New York City.

LETTERMAN: Actually, he’s in LA, and I’m–

OBAMA: Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! I’m smart!

LETTERMAN: So, the Middle East… is stuff going on there?

OBAMA: Not that I know of.

LETTERMAN: Wasn’t there like something with an embassy?

OBAMA: Maybe. I can’t remember the details. Why are we worrying about this stuff. Wasn’t I here to do my trick?

LETTERMAN: Okay. Sure. So you’re going to stand on your head for us?

OBAMA: I’m doing that now.

LETTERMAN: Actually, you’re sitting… Well, that concludes this segment of “Stupid President Tricks.”

OBAMA: I’m a smart president.

LETTERMAN: Yes, we all know that.

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Straight Line of the Day: How Do You Confuse President Obama?

Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.

How do you confuse President Obama?

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For All!

Here’s an image of Obama’s campaign manager that seems more appropriate closer to Halloween:

Dude is creepy. You get this feeling he has more intentions for our nation’s youth than to just get them to vote.

This was part of some “For All” campaign where people do weird photos of stuff written on their hand that Obamessiah had done for them.

So what has Obama done?

$5 trillion more in debt… for all!

Suppressed job market… for all!

Credit downgrade… for all!

Really, they think if they write a couple things on their hands, we’ll totally forget what a crappy job Obama has done and instead think he’s so awesome. All the Jim Messina photo does is make you run out and make sure you know where your kids are.

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Maybe This Will Brighten Up Your Day

It seems that Obama is making plans to move already. From WND:

Very quietly, Obama’s chief financier, Penny Pritzker, has entered the Hawaii housing market to buy a retirement home for the president and his family that will be available not in 2016, but in January 2013, according to a confidential source within Pritzker’s Chicago organization…

…“The public polls are mostly political,” the source argued. “Obama radicals want Romney supporters to feel discouraged and give up. Truth is that Romney’s winning.”

So, a $35 Million estate in Hawaii, ready by January 2013. That sounds promising. The only thing a big estate like that needs is a good name…

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Random Thoughts: Romney Is Done For!

Romney had a chance when the far left weren’t going to vote for him, but he’s done for now that they double extra won’t vote for him.

“The 47% video is pretty much the end of he Romney campaign.” -easily excitable dumb person

“We’re in debt? I hadn’t heard about that.” -Obama to Letterman during Stupid President Tricks segment

Okay, I have Siri on my iPad. Now what?

I asked Siri if it was raining and it emptied my bank account.

The people in Revolution are such sissies about not having electricity. The Founding Fathers didn’t have electricity and they beat the Nazis.

“No, on the government’s job machine, push the + button, not the – button!” -early president training for Obama

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Promoted Comment: Excerpt From Elizabeth Warren’s Autobiography – Foraging

(by Pendog [High Praise!])

From E. Warren’s page-turner “Dreams of My Father’s Relatives”

… Later, after recovering from that unprovoked racist attack on my superb riding technique I was sitting on my lean, muscular haunches by the bright flame of my fireplace insert. I reflected on the beauty I beheld in the raw savagery of my new leather couch. “You know, self?” I said, “I bet I really helped out a lot of Chinese people of Cherokee descent by purchasing this couch, they’ll spread the profits around because they know they didn’t build this couch themselves, Barack Obama helped build that couch”. Hungry, I went to kitchen to forage for nuts and berries but passing the hallway mirror I couldn’t help but catch a glimpse of my rather florid countenance. My rosacea only served to highlight my high cheekbones, making me blush with Native humility. “Girl,” I said, “you have got it goin’ on…”

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