What Democrats believe

Posted on September 21, 2012 7:00 am

CBS reports that only 15% of Democrats believe the economic news is bad.

Now, I know that math doesn’t seem to apply to Democrats. But it does. So, this means that 85% of Democrats either believe the economy is doing just fine — or at least don’t think it’s doing badly.

A Democrat takes a look at the high unemployment rate, which is even higher than reported if you take into account people who’ve given up looking for work, and figures things are going smoothly.

A Democrat sees gas prices twice what they were when Obama took office and thinks that’s just peachy.

A Democrat sees banks closing and thinks that’s just chock full of awesome.

What else might someone like that believe?

  • The tooth fairy.
  • MSNBC.
  • Free lunch.
  • Bigfoot.
  • Elvis working at a Burger King.
  • Fire won’t melt steel.
  • Bush blew up the towers.
  • Bush blew up the levees.
  • Aliens at Roswell.
  • Obama is qualified for … anything.
  • Magic.
  • Squirrels are actually spies working for the Mole People.
  • You can borrow your way out of debt.
  • Those people trying to kill us? They’re really, really nice.
  • The Moon Landing was faked.
  • The birth certificate is real.

Okay, maybe they’re right about one of those things.

Damn squirrels.

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14 Responses to “What Democrats believe”

  1. Duke of Earl says:

    How can the economy be doing bad under Barry, the median household income has dropped by about $5k and the prices of just about everything has been going up.

  2. The Animal says:

    Yet another reason to shoot those *#@%! squirrels on sight.

  3. Rayfan87 says:

    Don’t you guys know anything? Squirrels work for the Illuminati the chipmunks are from the mole people. And the mole people are part of the Masons.

  4. tomg51 says:

    Reads like an outline for great B movie

  5. Harvey says:

    @4 …or another really lousy National Treasure sequel.

  6. Jimmy says:

    Hey, don’t be messin’ with my tooth fairy! She’s alive and well – well, her memory isn’t so good but neither is mine.

  7. Scott says:

    Guns can kill without any human intervention.

  8. NO_MO_BAMA says:

    It’s doing just fine for all the people who don’t work….oh wait, that is the democrats, never mind.

  9. Fly says:

    At least 66.6% of their delegates also believe in God and Jerusalem as the capital of Israel!

  10. Marc says:

    47% of the people are doing just awesome in from the Democrat POV. Now if they could just get 52% more people on food stamps (got to have that 1% to pay for everything) then we would have utopia and unicorns running through the streets.

  11. Writer says:

    That if you believe in Abortion paid for by others, but not in the Death Penalty, you are coherent and logical.

  12. Ogrrre says:

    I’m with Animal on this! I never liked those fuzzy tailed rats in the first place.

  13. silaS marreD says:

    Not totally false – Elvis is everywhere, man! Elvis is in your genes. He’s in your cheeseburgers. Elvis is in Nutty Buddies!

  14. Crabby Old Bat says:

    ยป You can borrow your way out of debt.

    And another illustration of where Democrats think money comes from:


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