VP Debate Haiku

[High Praise! to Teri O’Brien]

Bombastic Biden

Bullying lying blowhard

His antics thrill Matthews.

Last night we saw Joe

Crazy old man off his meds

No fool like old fool.

Two more at Teri O’Brien

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Romney’s “Better Off” Question – Answered

[High Praise! to The Last Refuge]

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2nd Presidential Debate Open Thread

Because IMAO is where you go to discuss things, here’s an open thread for the debate tonight. Obama knows he sucked in the first one, so what sort of crazy Obama will get tonight who tries to make up for that? Who knows — but I’m excited to find out!

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Video: Jay Leno Beats Up Biden in his Monologue

[High Praise! to NewsBusters]

[NB direct link]

There’s still “nothing funny” about Obama, of course, but Joe Biden has just been green-lit for left-wing comedians to pummel like a speedbag.

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You’ve Been Judged!

Keln of Nuking Politics picked his favorite punchlines to “Joe Biden’s teeth…

Click here to see if you made the cut.

If you did, you should probably email him about becoming a guest blogger there.

If you didn’t, he’s got another straight line for you to practice on.

Keep trying. No one likes a quitter.

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Pictorial Essay: Is Big Bird the New Valerie Jarrett?

[High Praise! to Breitbart]

That guy is EVERYWHERE with the President. Here he is getting bin Laden:

Snuffy says, “Gutsy call, Bird”.

Many more pictures at Breitbart.

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Link of the Day: Excerpt From Joe Biden’s Diary

[High Praise! to Nuking Politics]

I am Joe: Thoughts of a Special VP – Bill

I swear, Joe Biden has become the Tom Cullen of Vice-Presidents.

“M-O-O-N, that spells ‘jobs'”

[Think you have a link that’s IMAO-worthy? Send it to harvolson@gmail.com. If I use your link, you will receive High Praise! (assuming you remember to put your name in the email)]

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A Moment With Joe Biden: The VP Debate

[by Son of Bob]

And now, a moment with Joe Biden…

BIDEN: …and folks, I wanna tell ya, these folks on the other side are getting desperate. Did you happen to see the vice-presidential debate? That’s right, we creamed them. We creamed them. I almost felt sorry for poor Paul Ryan. But, that night you saw the difference between our two sides. It was right there for everyone to see. Paul Ryan wanted to sit there and talk about facts all night. He wanted to go on and on about the economy and Medicare… that’s all they’ve got, boring facts. Meanwhile, I hit ’em where it hurt. The fact that Romney made a speech where he mentioned that 47 percent of Americans get free stuff from the government, so they probably won’t vote for him. ‘Cause he wants to stop giving out free stuff! It’s true! So, the difference between our two campaigns couldn’t be more clear. Now, who wants candy?

This has been a moment with Joe Biden.

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Wisdom of the Day: Boo Boo Trampoline Math Bathroom Cokie

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One Picture: This Is Exactly How I Saw the VP Debate

[High Praise! to Freedom Is Just Another Word]

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New video from Steven Crowder? Do you like glam rock? Of course you do:

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Straight Line of the Day: President Obama’s “Secret Weapon” in the Debate…

Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.

President Obama’s “Secret Weapon” in the debate…

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Why Do Men Hate Democrats?

So a new Gallup poll shows Romney with a big lead in the swing states. It also shows that Romney is tied among women while he leads among men by 12 points. Now, we constantly hear about the gender gap, but it’s always focused on women. Why don’t we hear more about how Obama and his sissiness is creeping out men?

The Democrats have become this whole movement of whiners and men just can’t stand them. I mean, look at them getting behind the OWS movement — a bunch of whiny babies who didn’t know exactly what was wrong but knew they wanted other people to fix it. And they rallied behind Sandra Fluke and her whining about how she had to go to Walgreens to buy her birth control. Men hate this crap. Every time people whine, the Democrats jump to it and try to help people with some new billion dollar program when shouting, “Shut up, losers!” is much cheaper and in the long run probably much better for our country. You gotta smack around the hippies if you want men to support, but Dems aren’t willing to do that because that gets in the way of their pandering strategy. So they’re now the whiny sissy party, and men don’t want anything to do with them.

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Random Thoughts: Pity the Flu

No one told me NIST approved a new hash standard. FAIL, Twitter. FAIL.

I wonder if Ann Romney has trained her horse to dance Gangnam style.

If I could ever travel faster than the speed of light I’d go back in time and punch Einstein.

Stephanie Cutter used to work for Ted Kennedy? She’s even more horrible a person than I imagined.

If Romney ties Obama with women, but Obama is way behind with men, why isn’t there more talk of how Obama’s sissiness scares away men?

The main thing I learned from the VP debate was that after getting dosed with Joker venom, you crash hard.

Is it just me, or is Candy kind of a stripper name?

Good joke for Romney to start the night with – To Moderator: “Well, I hope you brought enough Candy for everyone.”

If it’s real undecided voters in the town meeting debate tomorrow, aren’t their questions going to be really dumb?

They should do a sequel to Face Off where the criminal and crook get their Facebook pages swapped.

So the Gallup poll is stupid and wrong but the WaPo D +9 poll is perfectly cromulent?

Aren’t questions from undecided voters going to be things like, “What’s a good question to ask?”

Romney shouldn’t have mentioned Big Bird. Everyone like Big Bird. Instead, he should have promised to end Abby Cadabby.

Wow. I just realized some of my tax dollars go to Abby Cadabby. That’s an injustice right up there with slavery.

Free Idea: Hire Mr. T for flu shot ad campaigns. “I pity the flu!”

The ground game is crucial for the upcoming election because you can’t vote in a plane.

Nothing reminds my wife of things she needs me to do like the sound of my butt hitting the couch.

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I’ve Never Seen an RNC Ad Get a Million You Tube Hits Before

[YouTube direct link] (Viewer #1,331,700)

How could the Democrats possibly respond? Sew together a bunch of clips of Paul Ryan sounding intelligent and reasonable?

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