My Prediction

Posted on November 5, 2012 11:00 am

Well, this is kind of a useless day. One more weekday of sitting around speculating before the actual election. I’m not sure what to do or even what to talk about as we’ve been over it all so much. The polls seem to be leaning Obama right now, but they also tend to have these ridiculous partisan makeups where we’re to believe Obama increased the number of Dems from 2008 over his painful first term. So who knows what will happen.

Still, I have to make a prediction because I’m sort of like a pundit. And people look up to me. And some dogs, too. Cats mainly ignore me, though.

Anyway, here’s my prediction:

Obama wins, and not as narrowly as people were thinking. All the swing states go his way and at least one surprise state no one was looking at. And the Democrats hold the Senate and even gain one seat. And in the biggest surprise, the Democrats retake the House. The left are absolutely thrilled with the result and have a huge party. And all the big celebrities are there like Tom Hanks and Katy Perry and… wait? Is that Ted Kennedy? Somehow he’s still alive and spiking the punch! It’s a new brighter future for progressives!

And then they wake with a knock at the door. Sleepy, they shuffle to answer it and standing outside is President Romney with his new task force going door to door declaring ownership of women’s uteruses. Obama’s reelection win was all just a dream! And now the real nightmare begins!

So what’s your prediction?

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29 Responses to “My Prediction”

  1. Zaklog the Great says:

    You forgot, Obama is almost certain to win those extra seven states. I forget how many electoral votes they have, but it could be a significant proportion.

  2. Apostic says:

    So what’s your prediction?

    People will complain. People who promised they’d move to France will not do so, although they will continue to complain. Mildly deranged TV news readers will find new ways to be mildly deranged. People will complain about that, too, and more people will get their news from other news outlets. Cats and dogs will live together. No one will complain about that as long as there are cute YouTube videos of it.

  3. Apostic says:

    Oh, and Harvey will have to find a relacement series for lolbama

  4. Vaktatunnen says:

    Uh, to get back to the, uh, the warning that I’ve received you may take it with how many… however many grains of salt you wish, that the brown acid that is circulating around us is not specifically too good. Uh, it’s suggested that you do stay away from that, course it’s your own trip, so be my guest, but, uh, please be advised that there is a warning on that one OK?

  5. rodney dill says:

    My prediction: Entropy will continue

  6. DamnCat says:

    “I’m not sure what to do or even what to talk about as we’ve been over it all so much.”

    Tuna! Everybody always likes to talk about tuna!

  7. tomg51 says:

    1) Romney wins
    2) UN votes that the US is an aggressive Mormon state and demands all missionaries be recalled
    3) Dinosaurs, rocket launchers, railguns and a lot of “F**k Yeah!” ensues
    4) We all win

  8. Genghis Khen says:

    I too, predict that the Democrats will win, but not as handily as Frank says. Then, they’ll cut off Frank’s fingers, gouge out his eyes, and cut out his tongue, so he can no longer blog or write his musings. Then, every democrate with a position of leadership will gather in the Superdome to celebrate. The same Superdome where they had to install a couple of pillars to hold up the structure following Katrina. And, the very pillars where they will tie Frank to mock him while they party. Since Frank is far too weak to exact revenge himself, Basil will race into the Superdome in his monster truck sporting a gun rack and 50 American flags while blasting Country and Western music. Basil will ram right into the previously mentioned pillars bringing the entire structure collapsing on everyone inside. Other things then happen, but I’m going to wait to tell you all because I’m going to blog about them once Sarah K takes over IMAO and I replace Basil a guest blogger.

  9. Son of Bob says:

    My Prediction: Suddenly, the “mainstream” media will be re-born and announce that they will once again pressure the President for “the truth” at every opportunity, and demand press conferences be held when they are not given those opportunities. That they will suddenly become the watchdogs for the American people, holding their elected leaders to task…and, all this will begin in January.

  10. Keln says:

    My prediction: Obama maintains the support of 47% of all eligible voters…of which only 47% even show up to the polls.

    Romney wins. Obama goes to live in his Hawaiian estate of Disgraceland and leaves us alone.

  11. Travelwise42 says:

    The deceased will continue to somehow vote Democrat but the blue states in the North East will realize whose fault it is that there is
    no gas.
    Live rounds will be cast at some polling places and when the smoke clears Biden sells his story to “Alzheimer’s Monthly”!

  12. Ernie Loco says:

    …Biden sells his story to “Alzheimer’s Monthly”!

    You know, they could make a lot more money changing the title to “Alzheimer’s Weekly” and just publishing the same issue for 4 straight weeks.

  13. CTCompromise says:

    “Cats mainly ignore me, though” …..try opening a can of tuna!

  14. CTCompromise says:

    It will be interseting to see how the blue states affected by Sandy (Now, that’s a nice, middle class, Republican name, isn’t it ?) – my own included- will vote. Although CT is in a much better situation than New York, New Jersey, etc. where SO many have: lost family & friends, their homes and everything in them, are still without power, have no gas for the generators they spent hundreds of dolla’s on in order to prepare for the storm, are spending hours trying to commute to work..and have yet to see FEMA. However, the states have made it possible to vote by unconventional methods, like phone (which the affected don’t have service to). I don’t see any chance of rampant voter fraud…Do you ?

  15. Carpenter says:

    Media Corruption and Voter fraud
    Obama wins (according to the Media)

    Protests violence
    Obama declares Martial Law
    Obama uses American Troops against Americans

    Civil War

    Do you remember that TV show Jericho?
    That IS my prediction.

  16. Bunkerhillbilly says:

    I’m not sure what to do or even what to talk about

    How about the amazing season Notre Dame football is having?

    …people look up to me. And some dogs, too.

    Not Irish Wolfhounds.

    So what’s your prediction?

    Obama’s underlings in the justice department challenge election results and tie things up until early January when the process finally reaches SCOTUS and the ever-wise final decision making of Chief Justice Roberts…. on January 19th, Obama, via executive order, declares himself President for Life and suspends the constitution…Justice Roberts, smiles benignly and issues a statement declaring the decision evidence of the will of the people and that it is not the responsibility of the court to interfere.

  17. Dohtimes says:

    Islamic Rage Boy will be replaced by Obama Voter Rage Boy and photoshop hilarity will commence.

  18. Dirk The Imapiler says:

    Romney wins by enough electoral college votes that even the most crooked of Demon-RATS has to accept the outcome.

    On November 7th, the sun will shine a little brighter, the skies will be a little bluer, and I will be so hung over that I will be worshiping the porcelan god with sacrifices from deep inside me for at least 2 days… But it will be so worth it!!!

  19. Iowa Jim says:

    I drink a lot of beer, either to celebrate or to self-medicate.

  20. Carpenter says:

    IF Romney wins, and I sure hope he does, I say we KICK the states that went for OBAMA out of the United States of America. Let the Obama Zombies form their own damned country based on HIM (Homosexual Islamic Marxism).

  21. Jack says:

    Romney wins. Then the good citizens of Los Angeles decide their television isn’t new enough. That’s when Leroy Jenkins says: “Alright, times up, let’s do this. Leeeeeeeeeeeeeroy Jeeeenkinnnnsss. And throws a brick through an appliance store’s plate glass window. LA riots 2.0 and hilarity ensue!

  22. Brutus says:

    I finally finish physical therapy on my knee and shoulder. I’ll be a lot more flexible after the election.

  23. NO_MO_BAMA says:

    I predict……riots….no mater who wins. But especially [racism] if the half black guy loses[/racism].

  24. Writer says:

    DemoCraps will have an outbreak of Romney Derangement Syndrome.
    Obamanation will cry.
    Moo-chelle will search for the silver cabinet.
    Sandra FLuke will stare at her EPT and sya,”Boy am I Fluked now”.

  25. RAML says:

    Whatever happens will happen and four years from now we will be doing this again. Have a good one people may your desires come true.

  26. Bad Science says:

    Well, Obama seems to love the drones. I guess if he gets reelected Skynet would probably become self aware. And who wants that?

  27. RMSGeek says:

    My prediction is that I will get a cat and hold his eyes open like that scene in Clockwork Orange with the eye drops and make him read your blog.

  28. 5of7 says:

    Romney wins because the 2010 midterms happened, because that “Hey, let’s all eat at Chik-fil-a today just for the hell of it and pi$$ off the pc (spits) crowd!” thing happened, because Bengazi happened, and because Hurricane Sandy happened and gave everyone a timely reminder of what Top-Down government looks like.

  29. Mike says:

    Dogs can’t look up.

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