Straight Line of the Day: Obama Proposes 6,125 New Regulations. The Craziest One…

Posted on November 13, 2012 12:00 pm

Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.

Obama proposes 6,125 new regulations. The craziest one…

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49 Responses to “Straight Line of the Day: Obama Proposes 6,125 New Regulations. The Craziest One…”

  1. Laurence Simon says:

    Obama proposes 6,125 new regulations. The craziest one mandates that everyone visiting Graceland must step on Elvis’ blue suede shoes twice: once upon entering and once upon leaving.

    -ls

  2. tim says:

    CEOs of companies making more than 1 million / year must wear a top hat and monocle

  3. archangel says:

    …shouldn’t really be a surprise: “all half black two-term presidents receive right of first refusal as to a third and fourth term”.
    …”says you have to make my bunk. if we were in germany I’d have to make your bunk, but we’re in italy so you have to make mine. it’s regulations.”
    …mandates the creation of the half-black panthers.
    …blames bush for benghazi.
    …requires registering your imao handle in the fbi database.

  4. Manolo says:

    …involves a rubber chicken, a can of Crisco and Richard Trumka’s mustache.

  5. Manolo says:

    …creates the “Barrack H. Obama Presidential Library, featuring the Vice President Joe Biden Children’s Reading Room.”

  6. Kevin Siekierski says:

    …is a regulation for more regulations.
    …requires all voters not to have ID.
    …is a troop surge in the War on Women.

  7. g says:

    … Instead of a little read book citizens must at all times carry an i-pod full of 0bama’s speeches.

  8. Genghis Khen says:

    …prohibits companies from firing employees or reducing their hours or pay.

  9. Ogrrre says:

    Manolo at #4 has it so far. That’s just sick, Manolo … keep it up!

  10. Genghis Khen says:

    …mandates a chicken in every pot.

  11. rodney dill says:

    Badges? We don’t need not stinkin’ badges.

  12. rodney dill says:

    The honey badger has to care

  13. rodney dill says:

    @tim #2 LOL

  14. rodney dill says:

    Let the Wookie win…

  15. rodney dill says:

    …involves a rubber chicken, a can of Crisco and Richard Trumka’s mustache.

    …still don’t know what it is, but Chief Elizabeth Warren claims she can ride it.

  16. rodney dill says:

    …says ‘All your base are belong to us.’

  17. rodney dill says:

    …bans ROUS’s like Chris Christie…
    (Republicans Of Unusual Size)

  18. rodney dill says:

    Bans Bacon

  19. rodney dill says:

    changes the pledge of allegiance to — “Ekke Ekke Ekke Ekke Ptangya Ziiinnggggggg Ni!”

  20. rodney dill says:

    All coins will now have the phrase “In Zod We Trust”

  21. Jason says:

    the office of President will now be changed to furor….

  22. Marc says:

    requires you to cut down the mightiest tree in the forest with a herring then fines you for deforestation.

    authorizes requires the IRS to tax all tax refunds.

  23. Marc says:

    refuses to approve the Keystone Pipeline but autorizes the Vogons to build a hyperspace bypass.

  24. rodney dill says:

    specifies that non-citizens will only need to answer, “What is your favorite color?” to legally gain entry to the United States.

  25. Chip says:

    Straight Line of the Day: Obama Proposes 6,125 New Regulations. The Craziest One requires a young priest and an old priest.

  26. Rayfan87 says:

    $10million to buy ZF-1’s to arm the Mexican cartels.

  27. CarolyntheMommy says:

    If you want your bread ration, you must first do the Truffle Shuffle.

  28. CarolyntheMommy says:

    #24, how dare you force immigrants to be able to see color in order to gain lawful entry?! That’s suppression!

  29. rodney dill says:

    After the President finishes speaking everyone present will need to give him a “Harumph!”

  30. rodney dill says:

    You will be allowed to play “Words with Friends” on the tarmac.

  31. jw says:

    …requires k-y jelly, a gerbil and a tube of superglue.

  32. frogmouth says:

    is going to be passed so you can find out what’s in it.

  33. tomg51 says:

    …says the Senate must abide by them! Crazy! Insane! it’ll never work!

  34. Dohtimes says:

    …NASA will design new spacesuits to be Muslim compliant and come with artificial gravity enabled prayer rugs.

    …requires Yankee Doodle to arrive via high speed rail.

    …imposes a fine on anyone who serves him a cooked canine when he says “Yo, Dawg”.

    …is that any of his future sons look like him or have a passable resemblance to Trayvon, or be shot.

  35. CTCompromise says:

    Obama proposes 6,125 new regulations. The craziest one…requires that for the next 4 years all male children born in the U.S.A. must be given the middle name Hussein.

  36. CTCompromise says:

    Obama proposes 6,125 new regulations. The craziest one…requires that the Gideons must place a quran alongside every bible they place in hotel rooms.

  37. archangel says:

    …requires hillary pull up her hair and put on some makeup.
    …requires bill clinton’s black book of autobiographers be cross-referenced with petraeus’ for overlap, then given to him in a brown envelope. history won’t write itself!
    …instructs the press to start talking about michelle’s fantastic arms again.
    …declares smoking good for you…but only menthols.

  38. Writer says:

    Obama proposes 6,125 new regulations. The craziest one…requires straight married couples be automatically divorced after twenty-five years. that

  39. Writer says:

    Obama proposes 6,125 new regulations. The craziest one…requires that all reporters who dare to question him be deported.

  40. Bob in Feenicks says:

    …requires frankfurters to contain at least 20% real dog to be called hot dogs.

  41. rodney dill says:

    placed a tax on every hour saved during daylight savings time.

  42. tanstaafl says:

    requires all americans to have their iq’s surgically reduced to the average of all those who voted for obama

  43. rodney dill says:

    The Crimson Tide will chant, “ROLL OBAMA ROLL!” at every game.

  44. rodney dill says:

    W.H. Petition Calls for Stripping Citizenship and Exile for Anyone Who Signs Petition to Secede

    (nevermind, this one’s true.)

  45. 4of7 says:

    Orders the tide to recede.
    When it doesn’t, blames King Canute.

  46. Mike says:

    …specifies that everything bad that happened pre-2001 be Bush’s fault, too.

  47. Mike says:

    …limits the total number of federal regulations to 6,124 (effective 12/21/2012), thus creating the paradox that will bring about the end of times.

  48. Dohtimes says:

    …outlaws the use of toilet paper because it violates the just passed Endangered Feces Act.

  49. IMAO » Blog Archive » You’ve Been Judged! links:

    […] Keln of Nuking Politics picked his favorite punchlines to “Obama proposes 6,125 new regulations. The craziest one…” […]

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