A majority think Santa is a Democrat? That’s stupid. A Democrat Santa would be awful.
* To fund his Christmas gift giving, he’d spend the other 364 days of the year mugging people.
* If you left out cookies for him, he’d add you to Michelle Obama’s naughty list.
* The whole point of his gift giving would just be to get you to reelect him to his cushy Santa position.
* Instead of giving coal to bad kids, he’d take away their parents coal-related jobs.
* Main gift for girls: Abortion vouchers.
* No presents for any children unless he was allowed to raise tax on the rich for no particular reason.
* If you asked him for a Red Ryder BB gun, he’d report you to the police.
* He wouldn’t enter any home than displayed a manger on the front yard.
* It wouldn’t just be his outfit that was red.