Straight Line of the Day: Weirdest Ornament on the White House Christmas Tree…

Posted on December 10, 2012 12:00 pm

Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.

Weirdest ornament on the White House Christmas tree…

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74 Responses to “Straight Line of the Day: Weirdest Ornament on the White House Christmas Tree…”

  1. rodney dill says:

    A binder full of women.

  2. rodney dill says:

    Joe Biden’s underwear.

  3. g says:

    … A paper chain made of the constitution.

  4. jw says:

    a dog collar with BBQ sauce

  5. rodney dill says:

    A little baby Obama nativity scene.

  6. Mxymaster says:

    Harvey’s shrunken head

  7. Scott says:

    an iPod that constantly plays Obama’s “greatest” speeches.

  8. Scott says:

    a miniature bust of Winston Churchill.

  9. rodney dill says:

    Osama bin Ladin’s head.

  10. Alucard says:

    This hammer-and-sickle-shaped ornament that looks like a hammer and sickle.

  11. rodney dill says:

    A set of Evel Knievel “Fiscal Cliff Jumping Bungee cords.”

  12. Greg says:

    The dinner plate with Bo’s picture on it.

  13. DamnCat says:

    Boehner’s testicles

  14. E Pluribus Unum says:

    A lump of West Virginia coal.

  15. AT says:

    A sign saying, “THIS IS A HOLIDAY TREE, NOT A ******MAS TREE.”

  16. frogmouth says:

    The star at the top? Inside a crescent moon.

  17. Conservatarian says:

    …70 Virgin Mary’s

  18. zzyzx says:

    A statuette of Mohamed.

  19. rodney dill says:

    – Moroni’s gold plates
    – A Rick Perry “Don’t Mess With Taxes” bumper sticker

  20. Manolo says:

    Weirdest ornament on the White House Christmas tree…is Mitt Romney’s tax records.

  21. Manolo says:

    Weirdest ornament on the White House Christmas tree…is Harry Reid’s blow-up child.

  22. Manolo says:

    Weirdest ornament on the White House Christmas tree…are the absentee ballots of America’s military. Good thing it’s a big tree.

  23. Manolo says:

    Weirdest ornament on the White House Christmas tree…was a restraining order taken out by Michelle Obama against Sandra Fluke.

  24. Manolo says:

    Weirdest ornament on the White House Christmas tree…was a model of the bus driven over Debbie Washerwoman Schultz.

  25. Manolo says:

    Weirdest ornament on the White House Christmas tree…was a snowglobe of Bin Laden’s compound that Obama led SEAL Team 6 into.

  26. tomg51 says:

    …is the miniature prayer rug
    …is the burkha covering the entire tree
    …is the 2013 Acapulco Cliff-Diving attendee memento
    …is the snow-globe with an inhale pipe
    …is the candle burning at both ends
    …is the red garland at nearly the top labeled Iranian Nukes
    …is the shrunken wookie-head doll

  27. Manolo says:

    Weirdest ornament on the White House Christmas tree…was the replica government-issued contraceptive Mary would have gotten if Republicans hadn’t waged war on lady parts.

  28. Manolo says:

    Weirdest ornament on the White House Christmas tree…was the paper cutout reading “Property of the People’s Republic of China.” What? That wasn’t an ornament? My bad.

  29. rodney dill says:

    @DamnCat #13: …. and a snow globe filled with Boehner’s tears…

  30. Mike in OH says:

    A 1:24 scale model of Sandra Fluke’s diaphragm

  31. rodney dill says:

    …a diorama of desolation with two trunkless legs on a pedestal, on which the words appear, “My name is Ozymandias, king of kings: Look on my works, ye Mighty, and despair!”

  32. apostic says:

    …a Chirstmas angel made to look like Sandra Fluke. People worry about sticking on the top bit without a condom.

  33. rodney dill says:

    …and empty chair.

  34. Iowa Jim says:

    . . . a pewter sculpture of a dog on a Weber barbecue
    . . . a bong
    . . . one of the guns from the Fast and Furious operation

  35. Steve H says:

    Voodoo dolls of Rush, Sean, Laura, Michelle, etc…

  36. BJM2009 says:

    Weirdest ornament on the White House Christmas tree…is made from a pair of Kerry Washington’s red lace panties.

  37. AT says:

    A banner along the base that says, “I didn’t decorate this.”

  38. K says:

    The tears of hippies mourning the poor slaughtered tree.

    Haahahahhhaaaa… Okay seriously, on the White House Holiday Tree there were pollster approved, non-offensive, non-denominational, bio-degradable, recycled, inclusive….

  39. CTCompromise says:

    Weirdest ornament on the White House Christmas tree…was the garland made entirely of dog collars buckled together.

  40. rodney dill says:

    …and ornament of lemmings running off a cliff.

  41. HokieGomer says:

    …was the cocaine flocking.

  42. a guy named Rob says:

    was the solar powered twinkie being slow roasted over a pile of burning US flags, rotated by union members making 100K / year for turning the twinkie for 10 minutes a day, that plays a “4 more years!!” chant when it flips over and can be converted into an free Obama phone. Sticker on bottom says Obama-care waiver sold separately.

  43. tanstaafl says:

    a snow globe containing a hospital (we could only hope)

  44. Dohtimes says:

    …was the loud speaker that periodically called Obama to prayer.

    …was the Santa with a bayonet in his back.

  45. Kent says:

    … instead of the traditional tinsel, Sandra Fluke’s used condoms.

  46. hoboat says:

    ….a proposed discount coupon book for food stamps.

  47. Kerkat says:

    …is all the star ornaments that were hung upside down.

  48. CTCompromise says:

    Weirdest ornament on the White House Christmas tree…the one that blamed Bush for cutting down the tree.

  49. CTCompromise says:

    Weirdest ornament on the White House Christmas tree…the one with Barak at the stable in the nativity scene.

  50. CTCompromise says:

    Weirdest ornament on the White House Christmas tree…milk bones

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