Straight Line of the Day: At His Inauguration, Instead of a Bible, Obama Will Put His Hand…

Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.

At his inauguration, instead of a Bible, Obama will put his hand…

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56 Comments

  1. At his inauguration, instead of a Bible, Obama will put his hand…straight through the Constitution of the United States of America.

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  2. At his inauguration, instead of a Bible, Obama will put his hand…on two Bibles, because all REAL liars say they “will swear on a stack of Bibles”.

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  3. At his inauguration, instead of a Bible, Obama will put his hand…behind him with his fingers crossed, so the oath doesn’t “count”.

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  4. …the Quran
    …either a copy of “The Audacity of Hope” or “Dreams of My Father”
    …Chris Matthew’s knee giving him a real tingle down his leg

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  5. well seeing how Obama is a “Divine Judgement” for America’s abandonment of GOD in favor of the Un-Biblical Humanistic Liberal-Commie-Homosexual Agenda, he just might go with the Bible! Why shouldn’t he?

    Barack Hussein Obama is the literal Biblical fulfillment of Gods Wrath by Abandonment. He is the instrument of Providence. We (the people) have been given over to Moral Depravity and Perversion. God has lifted his protective Grace on America and Obama is the result.

    Romans 1:24 NIV
    Therefore God gave them over in the sinful desires of their hearts to sexual impurity for the degrading of their bodies with one another.

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  6. One hand on the bible, one hand behind his back . . finger’s crossed.

    There will be copies of any and all religious texts he can find, bible, quoran, torah, the works of Confucius, FSM doctrine, Alistair Crowley autobiography, a few fortune cookies . . . . all placed across, so nonoe coudl bee seen as superior.

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  7. Well, Apostic and FormerHostage grabbed the easy win I was hoping for, so I’m going to say;
    “…over the wrong side of his chest to cover his heart. With the wrong hand. Again.”

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  8. …in his pocket, and yours and mine and heck, he will even put one hand in Alanis Morrisette’s pocket while flicking a cigarette, and then he will put it on the phone when his Imam calls to see if he has permission to continue the Jihad.

    …up to block the camera following Michelle around that’s filming the documentary “The Wookie Goes To Washington”.

    …on a faded Obama poster and “swear to that guy to uphold or hold up the Constitution”.

    …a copy of How to Make Friends and Influence People With Bus Wheels.

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  9. @can of spam: How would you know if your hand hasn’t gone there?

    You are, of course, just speculating with the words “I don’t think they exist.”

    They don’t – for a fact.

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  10. on the autopen on the golf course in Hawaii and then the autopen will put it’s “hand” on the bible in DC.

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