Straight Line of the Day: To Avoid Bankruptcy, The U.S. Postal Service…

Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.

To avoid bankruptcy, the U.S. Postal Service…

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61 Comments

  1. Has sent flyers to businesses that basically says, “Nice package you got there. Be a shame if something happened to it.”

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  2. Postal union members want a little “gift” left for them in your mailbox if you want your mail deliverd, capish?

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  3. …is trying to amend the ObamaCare act to include the requirement that everyone purchase a book of stamps each week or pay a fine.

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  4. . . . demanded that the greedy 1% pay off all of their debts, the smug bastards. [Sadly, this is likely to be exactly true, through a bail-out subsidized by wealth-redistributive taxation.]

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  5. …are converting all their their delivery trucks to solar power. So much for that snow, rain and gloom of night pledge.

    …are changing their motto to “We’ll get it there…sometime…maybe…”

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  6. …will start a subscription service known as Fee Mail instead of just regular mail, because everyone knows once you hook up with Fee Mails you pay for it the rest of your life.

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  7. …extended franking privileges to all citizens, when you buy a stamp Barney Frank licks you.

    …will let a TSA agent weigh your package.

    …negotiated with their union to require all employees clock out before going postal.

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  8. Is offering a new service – for an extra $10 a week they’ll stop delivering you junk mail.

    Is starting a new concept – unlisted address

    Is raising their debt limit

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  9. @Rodney love the fee mail!

    why don’t they get rid of all the old LLVs (6-10 mpg) and buy up all the excess Volts? Just sayin…

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  10. @13. Former Hostage: ~~~~ To you – and to the Ferracotti Brothers (Hate to see any’fing break!)

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  11. Since stamps have gone up 700% in forty years, they claim they need more money.

    Do they have something to do with the Government?

    Who else has received a 700% increase in salary over that time?

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  12. …has merged with the mafia and is introducing a new slogan: “If you want to be sure they get the message, GO POSTAL!”

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  13. Pingback: IMAO » Blog Archive » You’ve Been Judged!

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