Straight Line of the Day: Why Did the Gun Cross the Road?

Posted on January 15, 2013 12:00 pm

Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.

Why did the gun cross the road?

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59 Responses to “Straight Line of the Day: Why Did the Gun Cross the Road?”

  1. Mrs. C says:

    to murder innocent children.

  2. g says:

    … because Eric Holder sent it there.

  3. Mike the Canuck says:

    To get to the high capacity clip on the other side.

  4. rodney dill says:

    …because it was being carried by a chicken.

  5. jason says:

    Biden is working on this whole out of control road crossing thing.

  6. rodney dill says:

    …Because the NRA member said, “I musket to the other side.”

  7. rodney dill says:

    …to get away from Cuomo.

  8. rodney dill says:

    To get to the blunderbuss stop.

  9. rodney dill says:

    …because it was the only free way.

  10. Carpenter says:

    because Obama wanted to arm the Mexican Drug Cartels

  11. FredKey says:

    Because the road had it comin’.

  12. Dohtimes says:

    …because the crossing guard fell asleep and all the live kids were stuck there.

    …Lee Harvey couldn’t get the angle just right.

    …the sign said Gun Free Zone, not Bullet Free Zone.

  13. FormerHostage says:

    …because the chicken had a Concealled/Carry permit.

    …cuz it was TEXAS!!!

    …none of your business and don’t ask!

    …to get a better shot.

  14. FormerHostage says:

    …just to pi$$ off liberals.

  15. FormerHostage says:

    …to better read the “Gun Free Zone” sign.

  16. DamnCat says:

    Because the road was the New York state line.

  17. DamnCat says:

    To catch the matinée at the gun show.

  18. rodney dill says:

    Because it was the ‘Sure Kill Expressway.”

  19. rodney dill says:

    “Bang Bang Bang Bang Bang Bang Bang Bang Bang Bang Bang Bang Bang Bang Bang Bang Bang Bang Bang Bang Bang…because.”

  20. blarg says:

    to prove that guns are capable of acting on their own.

  21. Jimmy says:

    Because he was walking on the Right and couldn’t see behind him, so he figured he’d cross over to the Left to see the wrecks coming down the road about to hit him.

  22. Jimmy says:

    …so he could shoot them.

  23. NoMoBama says:

    His getaway car was parked on the other side. Only rifles are tall enough to drive, that’s another reason to ban them.

  24. NoMoBama says:

    To buy a magazine.

    The bar was across the street and he wanted to get loaded.

  25. NoMoBama says:

    Proper English version:

    That’s where the bar was and he wanted to get loaded.

  26. artvol11 says:

    …Dianne Feinstein was in a windowless van offering it some candy.

  27. Mrs. C says:

    to be fitted for a new “magazine clip”

    A gun is an inanimate object – while it can be acted upon, it can not act on it’s own. Therefore the gun did not cross the road, it was carried; hopefully by a free citizen who was knowledgeable and responsible for it’s use. But even if it were carried by an ignorant citizen, even one with malicious thoughts, that’s okay too.
    It is only when that gun is used, by a person, in a criminal manner, that a crime is committed. And the fault lies with the person; the fallible, imperfect, human – who is subject to punishment for his immoral, illegal actions. If he commits a crime – gun or no – he is guilty and should be punished. The gun is not culpable, regardless of how it is used.

    Guess that’s more than a line, sorry.

  28. NoMoBama says:

    There was a free state on the other side and he was tired of being a slave.

  29. Dohtimes says:

    …it once belonged to Obama’s grannie and it saw a minority yoot on it’s side of the street.

    …it was just zig-zagging to avoid the puddles of liberal pee.

    …to get to the abortion clinic so it could high-five the doctor.

  30. Bootstrap says:

    …because there is better cover there.

    …Because that is where Eric Holder arranged for a Cartel to pick it up.

    …to get away from Diane Feinstein.

    …because the chicken is a freedom outlaw and refuses to bend to the will of a tyrant.

  31. Scott says:

    Why did the gun cross the road? There is no spoon.

  32. Scott says:

    According to anti-joke chicken, A gun can’t cross the road; it is an inanimate object that cannot do anything on it’s own…

  33. gsmtiger says:

    To get away from teh drug cartels it was sold to.

  34. Heftyjo says:

    Because shut the hell up!

  35. Rayfan87 says:

    Because it was in my gunsafe as I hit 90mph leaving NY.

  36. rodney dill says:

    …because the gun can cross anything it wants to… You got something to say about that!

  37. rodney dill says:

    …because it was still in the cold dead fingers of the person hit by Obama’s bus.

  38. Bob in Feenicks says:

    …he just got fired.

  39. Bob in Feenicks says:

    …he felt he was up to caliber.

  40. @boston_bubba says:

    To get to the gun-free zone.

  41. Robert says:

    To verify the kill.

    Because F#%^ the Po-lice. That’s why.

  42. rodney dill says:

    To get a better aim at the chicken.

  43. Dohtimes says:

    …because Travis Bickle’s Mohawk told it to.

    …because Sarah K’s Desert Eagle was held a bit too loosely.

    …the gun free zone around Obama is wider at the ears.

  44. artvol11 says:

    I would like to point out that Bootstrap stole my gun-grabbing politician.

  45. DrRiff says:

    Guns don’t cross roads; only chickens cross roads.

  46. rodney dill says:

    …because the gun goes wherever Djangos, (racial expletive deleted).

  47. gsmtiger says:

    … because it was trying to get out of New York.

  48. Tinman says:

    To get some high capacity ammunition.

  49. tomg51 says:

    ….because it was free range.

  50. GrandLarsenE says:

    to shoot the chicken

  51. john callow says:

    …because they’re too stupid to stay put and negotiate !

  52. CCO says:

    Give it to blarg’s #20.

  53. john callow says:

    …because they saw how successful taking an all or nothing stand was on tax increases…

  54. James says:

    To protect the second amendment

  55. Annie says:

    To punch a hippy in the face.

  56. Writer says:

    To reach the high ground overlooking the grassy knoll.

  57. Tommy the Towelhead says:

    ….because it was attached to the French border guard leaving his post for the cigarette shop.

  58. RAML says:

    makin a run for da border

  59. Bob Wheeler says:

    To get a-round.

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