Comments on: Straight Line of the Day: Why Didn’t You Make It To Obama’s Inauguration?

By: Bob in Feenicks

Bob in Feenicks — Thu, 24 Jan 2013 05:52:17 +0000

#80 CCO:

I would recommend a sonic screwdriver.
-While wearing a fez… fezes are cool.

By: IMAO » Blog Archive » You’ve Been Judged!

IMAO » Blog Archive » You’ve Been Judged! — Thu, 24 Jan 2013 00:24:34 +0000

[...] Keln of Nuking Politics picked his favorite punchlines to “Why didn’t you make it to Obama’s inauguration?” [...]

By: CCO

CCO — Wed, 23 Jan 2013 19:08:36 +0000

Bob @78, how do I fix my antenna to get that channel?

By: morigu

morigu — Wed, 23 Jan 2013 18:05:55 +0000

had to be sure the paint dried and watching it with baited anticipation was more than i could take for one day….
the new hi-speed train from my house in the boonies hasn’t been finished yet, seems there’s some insignificant bug thats endangered, holding up the project. so i said atleast the bugs got to live.

By: Bob in Feenicks

Bob in Feenicks — Wed, 23 Jan 2013 06:06:35 +0000

…A raggedy man in a blue box crashed in my yard. After going through all the food in my fridge to find something he liked, he stuffed himself with fish fingers and custard. He promised to take me on a trip in his blue box, but left and never came back. I was up all night waiting for him to return and I ended up sleeping through the inauguration.

By: Bob in Feenicks

Bob in Feenicks — Wed, 23 Jan 2013 05:55:23 +0000

…I knew I should have made that left turn at Albuquerque.

By: Vegas Grue

Vegas Grue — Wed, 23 Jan 2013 05:35:30 +0000

3/5ths of me wanted to go. The other 2/5ths convinced me not to go.

By: Hunter

Hunter — Wed, 23 Jan 2013 02:26:30 +0000

Because living out my remaining years having never been wanted for aggravated assault, or worse, remains one of my life-long goals. Why risk it?

By: Tau Dades

Tau Dades — Wed, 23 Jan 2013 01:34:29 +0000

… I was busy watching Pinky and the Brain to determine what Barry’s next step towards world domination was.

By: GrandLarsenE

GrandLarsenE — Wed, 23 Jan 2013 01:11:07 +0000

I had to do something less painfully nauseating. Pull off my toenails with a pair of pliers.

By: Duke of Earl

Duke of Earl — Wed, 23 Jan 2013 00:00:21 +0000

I was busy counting the number of rounds in my magazines so that Governor Cuomo doesn’t feel threatened.

By: john callow

john callow — Tue, 22 Jan 2013 23:51:02 +0000

Because they didn’t have Rosanne sing the Star Spangled Banner…(at least she actually sang…sucked the big one, but sang)

By: Jimmy

Jimmy — Tue, 22 Jan 2013 23:19:29 +0000

Because I’m racist!

(@48: Cars don’t pick-up Cats. They run over them.)

By: CTCompromise

CTCompromise — Tue, 22 Jan 2013 22:59:21 +0000

Why didn’t you make it to Obama’s inauguration?….Because I love this country.

By: CTCompromise

CTCompromise — Tue, 22 Jan 2013 22:58:45 +0000

Why didn’t you make it to Obama’s inauguration?…..Because it felt like a cold day in Hell…oh, wait…

By: CTCompromise

CTCompromise — Tue, 22 Jan 2013 22:58:08 +0000

Why didn’t you make it to Obama’s inauguration?…….my unicorn was sick.

By: CTCompromise

CTCompromise — Tue, 22 Jan 2013 22:55:15 +0000

Why didn’t you make it to Obama’s inauguration?….I had to work- As Brilliant Biden would say, it comes down to 4 letters: J-O-B.

By: CTCompromise

CTCompromise — Tue, 22 Jan 2013 22:53:00 +0000

Why didn’t you make it to Obama’s inauguration? ……..I was still wiped out from all the kwanza parties.

By: CTCompromise

CTCompromise — Tue, 22 Jan 2013 22:51:43 +0000

Why didn’t you make it to Obama’s inauguration? I was afraid of lightning strikes when he put his hand on the bibles.

By: CTCompromise

CTCompromise — Tue, 22 Jan 2013 22:50:55 +0000

Why didn’t you make it to Obama’s inauguration? I was out looking for Hugo Chavez.

By: CarolyntheMommy

CarolyntheMommy — Tue, 22 Jan 2013 22:23:03 +0000

Aliens invaded and stopped me from going. They used to be illegal aliens but I guess we call them legal now, so it’s all okay.

By: 9vMojo

9vMojo — Tue, 22 Jan 2013 22:06:13 +0000

i had to make green jello, fold some paper bags flat, and prep for a colonoscopy. But, it was a tough choice. P-/ arrr

By: Manse

Manse — Tue, 22 Jan 2013 21:05:26 +0000

I was in the lab cloning Reagan’s DNA fragments.

By: Max

Max — Tue, 22 Jan 2013 20:21:31 +0000

I already had purchased non-refundable tickets to my local gun show.

By: Uncle Kevvie, That's Who

Uncle Kevvie, That's Who — Tue, 22 Jan 2013 20:20:49 +0000

Hey, I had a really full-up day and just couldn’t squeeze in Barry, Mooch and all those kids.
8am –There I was, trying my hardest to ‘get rid of yesterday’, and it took quite some time……
1015 Am –Whew, glad ‘that’s’ over, what’s doin’ now…? Oh JEEZ, I clean fer’-got to reserve me a place at the D C Par-Tay….What’s a Metrosexual,Multi-Cultural Guy to do?
2pm–I give up, it’s all just too confusing. I’ll just go celebrate at that new, hip bistro that has
German-Chinese Fusion Cuisine. You eat it, you get hungry again, waayyy too soon, and you just want to go out and kill someone or something innocent that looks kinda’ like you…….while walking in really straight lines and saluting in a particular manner…….
8pm–Aren’t Wolf and Candice just the most adorable things…? But that ‘Piers Guy’, now he’s just the living end……of a colon………
2am today—–No, I don’t want another ShamWow…….