Maybe It’s Galactic Warming?

Posted on February 19, 2013 4:00 pm

CNN anchor Deb Feyerick asked if the asteroid that passed close to Earth on Friday was “an example of global warming?”

Of course it was. Just like Deb’s an example of a serious journalist.

[Additional commentary from Billy Madison]

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8 Responses to “Maybe It’s Galactic Warming?”

  1. FredKey says:

    It’s very simple. Your SUV heats up the atmosphere. The hot atmosphere makes the Earth more full of energy. That energy includes some electromagentic power. Comets are all, like, full of iron and stuff. The electromagentism caused by the hot planet attracts the comets. Ooooh, anyone checked to see if the moon is getting closer?

  2. zzyzx says:

    Maybe It’s Galactic Warming? Or maybe she’s just a moron!?

  3. jack says:

    No no no Fred! You’ve got the science all wrong. Listen this is very simple. The same thing happened to the dinosaurs. It’s a function of gravity and the temperature gradient-alpha-wave multiplier. As the Earth heats up more vegetation grows, causing more animals to feed off said vegetation. More poop is deposited and more CO2 is generated causing greater heat and thus more plants and thus more animals…in a vicious cycle of out-of-control carbon-based lifeforms. At some point the sheer output of alpha-waves—which waves some scientists theorize are the basis of telekinesis!—from all the lifeforms crawling on Earth literally sucks asteroids down onto the surface of the earth much like a planet-sized Hoover vacuum cleaner! Yes it’s true this planet really does suck!

  4. Carpenter says:

    Galactic Warming? No. Not yet.

    Actually this is just more poo being flung at the wall in the Monkey cage. If it sticks it stinks! If it stinks, well then, it must be true. This is what Liberals do. They fling Poo!

    Also, being environmentally concerned. if their poo falls to the floor (like most of the propaganda they fling) it is recycled and tossed at the wall again and again and again.

    This might sound weird but this is totally normal behavior for the Monkees in the media. This is how little Liberals are Hatched. This is how Liberal reproduce.

  5. Jimmy says:

    Yes, FredKey. The Moon is getting closer by approximately -3.82 cm/year.

  6. blarg says:

    today’s weather forecast – foggy throughout the morning, temperatures in the low 50’s followed by 20% chance of METEOR STRIKE in the afternoon.

  7. Bunkerhillbilly says:

    This might sound weird but this is totally normal behavior for the Monkees in the media.

    Naaah…I think Mickey Dolenz behaves in a much more civil manner since he stopped hanging out with Tommy Lee.

    Nesmith and Tork were never big on the poo-flinging thing. Davey Jones you had to watch out for, especially when he was running around with Keith Moon and Peter Sellers (renowned flingers, those three).

  8. FredKey says:

    See! Jimmy said it! IT’S GLOBAL WARMING!!!! GIVE UP YOUR SUV BEFORE YOU KILL US ALL!!!!!!111!!1!1eleven!!!!!1!!

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