Chris Matthews Would Constantly Pound on His Desk While Shouting “Guns Save Lives!”

[High Praise! to After Math]


[full size pic]

Send to Kindle

You’d Think They’d at Least Get 1/32 of the Minimum Wage

Although Elizabeth Warren advocates a $22 per hour minimum wage, the internships in her office are all unpaid.

Must be getting a cut of her worth as a Senator.

Send to Kindle

I Wonder What Logic Says About Punching Hippies?

[High Praise! to The Looking Spoon]

Send to Kindle

Link of the Day: Since It Included the Obamas, It Was Technically a Nightmare

[High Praise! to Nuking Politics]

A Quantico Tale

[Think you have a link that’s IMAO-worthy? Send it to harvolson@gmail.com. If I use your link, you will receive High Praise! (assuming you remember to put your name in the email)]

Send to Kindle

Wisdom of the Day: Catan Housekeeping NRA Kochs 1994 Snowflakes Obamacare Snacks Poem

Send to Kindle

I’m With the Majority on This

A new poll shows that only 4% of Americans think gun control is an important problem.

I assume the other 96% think it’s gun-controllers.

Send to Kindle

Nuke the Moon Principle in Action

A reader pointed out this excerpt from an article on Iran:

“This generation of revolutionary guards has very little respect for the U.S., particularly this president and this administration,” Alfoneh said. “Even worse, they misunderstand the signals President [Barack] Obama is sending to them.”

The IRGC views Obama’s public overtures as a sign of weakness, Alfoneh explained.

“President [George W.] Bush, he was a much better communicator” because he was firm and consistent, Alfoneh said. “In Washington, you do not understand the value of someone like President Bush.”

“In Tehran, the revolutionary officers began saying ‘Oh, he’s even more crazy than we are.’ That served the interest of the U.S.,” Alfoneh explained. “They fundamentally believed President Bush was completely unpredictable and capable of doing anything against them. The liberal class in this country does not understand” the value of this perception.

See, they thought Bush was crazy and that made them scared to act, but Obama is a weak pushover and they’re not as worried about him.

A strong president must nuke the moon. When people think you’re violent and crazy, they leave you alone.

Send to Kindle

Obama Warned Us – Knowledge

In a global economy where the most valuable skill you can sell is your knowledge, a good education is no longer just a pathway to opportunity – it is a pre-requisite.

BARACK OBAMA, Address to Joint Session of Congress, Feb. 24, 2009

“That’s why I’m proposing a network of special, high-intensity, ‘education camps’ all connected by high-speed rail.”

Send to Kindle

Why Do We Have Mosques with Radical Ties in America?

So the mosque the Boston bombers attended has radical ties. What’s amazing to me is we’re just hearing this now. What exactly do journalists do these days?

“So it’s pretty clear the Boston bombers did this because of their religion and not because right-wing cause like we were really hoping.”

“So should we look into their mosque and see what was being taught there?”

“Um… nah. I’m bored of this story now. Let’s comb through things Republicans have said lately and see if there’s something we can pretend to get outraged about.”

The radical mosque stuff makes me wonder if we’re being too tolerant these days. I mean, we need to be nice to all peaceful Muslims, but maybe we need to be much much meaner to any who advocate or hint at violence in any form. Like be “chase them out of the country” mean. Let’s be a little more discriminating where we apply our tolerance is all I’m saying.

Send to Kindle

Straight Line of the Day: Listed in California’s New “Homeless Bill of Rights”…

Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.

Listed in California’s new “Homeless Bill of Rights“…

Send to Kindle

The Most Unpopular of the Hated

According to a poll, Nancy Pelosi is the least liked of all the congressional leaders. And everyone hates Congress, so to be the least liked part of one of the most hated parts of our country… well that’s something.

So what is it about Nancy Pelosi everyone dislikes? The complete disconnect from the average American combined with the pompous attitude? But Congress is filled with completely useless yet pompous human beings. I mean, she really beats Harry Reid on that? But I guess she seems less senile than him which makes her more accountable for her actions and thus more awful.

Anyway, idea for balancing the budget: Put signs on the congressional leaders of things like “thief” and “traitor” and make them march in chains across the country in a sort of parade. It will be ten dollars to watch and thirty dollars for an over-ripe tomato. Think of all the money the government would make. It’s really pretty much the most useful thing we could do with those people.

Send to Kindle

You’ve Been Judged!

Anonymiss of Nuking Politics picked her favorite punchlines to “Because of the sequester cutbacks, airports…

Click here to see if you made the cut.

If you did, you should probably email Keln about becoming a guest blogger there.

If you didn’t, Anonymiss has got another straight line for you to practice on.

Keep trying. No one likes a quitter.

Send to Kindle

Random Thoughts: Burial at Sea, Drago, and Scotsman

Can’t we give Tamerlan Tsarnaev the proper Islamic burial of chucking him in the sea like we did Osama?

New rule to vastly improve politics: Make it illegal for any politician to use the words “fair” or “fairness.”

“I must break you.” -Ivan Drago eating a Kit Kat bar

So, as part of getting tough on terror, has Obama vowed to never hold a fundraiser in a terrorist’s house again?

Is it the opposite of the “No True Scotsman” fallacy in how the left try to pin anyone who commits violence to whomever they’re against?

My wife’s due date is May 3rd. That’s also the day Iron Man 3 comes out if she can get done quick enough.

Send to Kindle

In New York City, It’s Actually Part of the Official Dress Code

A city in Louisiana wants to prohibit people from wearing saggy pants below the waist and exposing their underwear.

Good thing Anthony Weiner’s not running for mayor there.

Send to Kindle