The Ultimate Pimp: The Sun

Posted on April 30, 2013 11:00 am

So a Democrat resolution says that global warming could drive women to prostitution. Sayeth the report:

[F]ood insecure women with limited socioeconomic resources may be vulnerable to situations such as sex work, transactional sex, and early marriage that put them at risk for HIV, STIs, unplanned pregnancy, and poor reproductive health.

The report also says global warming could cause wars and more refugees. So what happens when the planet get hotter? ABSOLUTELY EVERYTHING BAD YOU CAN THINK OF!

Right now, you might be saying, “Hmm. It’s a little cold in my house. I think I’ll turn up the heat.” DO NOT DO IT!!! When things warm up, bad things happen. Horrible things. Rip the thermostat off the wall. No more heating! We can’t take the risk! All warmth comes straight from hell!

Science!

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15 Responses to “The Ultimate Pimp: The Sun”

  1. FredKey says:

    “Transactional sex”? Is that what they call it now?

    Considering how hard these guys are working to make prost– uh, “sex workers” seem like emancipated people with honest jobs, you would think it was no biggie to them. Sure, bring on the global warming! More supply for the marketplace!

  2. Oppo says:

    Democrats think highly of women, don’t they?

  3. The Latest Thing To Blame On Global Warming | Tai-Chi Policy links:

    […] Prostitution. […]

  4. Bunkerhillbilly says:

    Parks a pharoah gold ’72 Caddy with YGDFTYLTATSOTE plates by the curb and checks out the “stable”.

  5. Oppo says:

    Women in heat?

    Well, climatologists did say global warming would ‘make it rain’ more often.

  6. Harvey says:

    Bacon to Bunkerhillbilly!

    http://tinyurl.com/YGDFTYLTATSOTE

  7. Canadian Commie says:

    I love how “early marriage” is put on-par with prostitution. The minds of liberals are fascinating.

  8. zzyzx says:

    Does the sun have no shame? First skin cancer, then global warming and now prostitution!? Where will it all end?

  9. Vaktatunnen says:

    I’m sick of this. The game is over. Nuke the Sun.

  10. John says:

    What do you expect from something created in a Big Bang and will end with a Big Rip?

  11. Writer says:

    This is it! Outlaw all furnaces!

  12. Robotimecop says:

    Sounds almost as bad as sequesterian

  13. TheFlyingPhoton says:

    Like #7, the thing that stuck out most to me was “early marriage.”
    These people think getting married right out of college or high school is equally as bad as being in a living situation where prostitution seems like a good move.

  14. Denise says:

    They’re not prostitutes any more. They’re either registered companions or whores.

  15. Carolynp says:

    So, if one wished to attract prostitutes, turn up the heat? I’d say a nice chunk of young guys I know will be cheering on global warming.

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