Top 12* Reasons Why Frank’s Kid Hasn’t Shown Up Yet

*IMAO Top 12 Lists are guaranteed to have 20% more content than other blogs’ Top 10 Lists!

12) Forgot to set the alarm clock.

11) Can’t find his Birth Certificate.

10) New 0bamaCare regulation stating that all babies must be born on the same day each year to save paperwork.

9) Stork made a wrong turn at Albuquerque.

8) Sarah following through on threat not to let him out until he cleans up his womb.

7) Attempting to set the new world record for human gestation.

6) Refusing to come out until somebody does something about who the President is!

5) 3 words: Bacon Flavored Placenta.

4) Recently featured on an episode of Pimp My Womb, refusing to leave newly renovated digs.

3) Still negotiating for a larger room and more allowance.

2) Sarah was just stuffing a pillow under her shirt for the last 9 months, wanted to see how long it took Frank to figure it out.

1) Found out who his Father is. Can you blame him?

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9 Comments

  1. 14) Peeked out, saw his shadow Frank, and decided there were six more weeks of winter womb.

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  2. I think this whole “baby” thing is just a ploy to improve his site’s ratings. He really jumped the shark on this one.

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  3. He objects to being called Butterthimble. Won’t end his boycott until the gluten is freed. His only wish is to totally dominate his kindergarten basketball games.

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