Daughter was sounding out 1st letter of words and saw pterosaur. Asked why some letters are silent, and I didn’t know what to tell her.
“There are bad people in the world… and apparently they chose how to spell things.”
Pitching a horror movie meant to play to conservative audiences: “Planet of the RINOs.”
So is there any verification of Cory Booker’s claim that he’s dating Morgan Fairchild?
“So where is T-Bone now?”
“Oh… uh… he was shot. Yeah, that’s the ticket. Died in my arms saying, ‘Run for Senate!’”
I’m kinda tired of this government. Who’s for just letting it collapse?
We have to begin the apocalypse to know what’s in it.
No one cared about teenagers getting on the internet when I was a teen in the mid 90s. Back then, there weren’t non-weirdos on the internet.
As I’ve said before, a third party will never work. A fourth party on the other hand…
“Shoot him, he’s the RINO!”
“No, shoot him. He’s the RINO!”
“I think I’ll just shoot myself.”
I’m usually against all the PC stuff, but come on: They’re called the “redskins.” How is that not awful?
I can star in Fifty Shades of Grey. How much does that pay?
The decisions on whether to raise the debt ceiling is about whether you want everything to collapse now or later.
In their defense, they couldn’t have been certain Obamacare would destroy itself when they started the shutdown.
You can tell who the RINOs are because they are the ones who moderated their views enough to get elected. #NeverElectedToAnything
When inevitably it’s announced that Obamacare’s individual mandate is delayed, let’s all tweet at once, “The shutdown worked!”
Have we tried applying Obamacare to other things? Like ending homelessness by fining people for not having homes? (I support that)
If you send an email to President Obama complaining that your insurance rates went up, you just get back a form letter saying, “I won.”
I’m not really for a 3rd party, but if conservatives decide to form one, I want to be on the committee to help name it.
I like the “Don’t Touch My Stuff” Party. “We will not lighten up!”
I didn’t know Siri could tweet for me
Now if I could only get Siri to tweet for me by using the phrase, “Tell the world…”
Siri tweet at Barack Obama that I don’t like him
You can use Siri to tweet on an iPhone without getting past the touch ID/passcode. Don’t steal my phone and tweet as me.
I’m Frank J. Flemming. I really support the Affordable Care Act.
Hey, has someone seen my iPhone?
“Shutdown theater” sounds like snuff films for robots.