Handling a Commie Encounter

Posted on December 11, 2013 11:00 am

So Obama shook hands with Commie dictator Raul Castro, and some people are angry about that. The problem is that Obama probably didn’t know what he was supposed to do with a Commie other than shake his hand because he hadn’t thought about how to handle Commies beforehand. I, on the other hand, am always thinking of what I’ll do when I encounter a Commie, and here are the option I always keep in mind:


* Punch
* Piledrive
* Strangle
* Burn
* Dropkick
* Shoot
* Headbutt
* Karate chop
* Shove into cannon
* Fire out of cannon
* Noogie

So Obama might want to add these option on how to handle a Commie to his current repertoire of “shake hands with” and “learn from.”

How do you handle a Commie?

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21 Responses to “Handling a Commie Encounter”

  1. DamnCat says:

    Frank, I’d love to see you put this plan into action. Maybe we could get you schedued for a tour of the White House.

  2. Oppo says:

    Call in a drone strike. Go back to what you were doing.

  3. blarg says:

    generally speaking, the interactions you specify above only apply when the interaction is between a commie and a non-commie.

  4. Jimmy says:

    * Musket to the junk
    * Blow torch to the junk
    * Grinder to the junk
    * Belt sander to the junk
    * Vice grips to the junk
    * Junk to the dump

  5. Oppo says:

    First, offer congratulations for attaining tenure;
    then say “Here’s my Gender Studies Program!” as you kick what will turn out to have been, if it turns out to have been a male, his nads.

  6. Oppo says:

    @4 Jimmy:

    “Musket to the junk”

    If it happens to be a Jewish Commie, you could simultaneously say:

    “Muzzle Tov!”

  7. Tim says:

    Regime Changing Day, of course.

  8. HubFlyer says:

    * Purple nurple

  9. walruskkkch says:

    with a ten foot Poland.

  10. Mrs. Campbell says:

    “How do you handle a Commie?” – Sounds like a straight line to me . . .

    From as great a distance as possible.

    “Nuke ‘em from orbit. It’s the only way to be sure.”

  11. jw says:

    send ‘em to Frank

  12. Bob B says:

    A land war in Asia

    “Tear down this wall!”

    Star Wars

  13. DrRiff says:

    Boot to the head!
    (look it up on you tube)

  14. Iowa Jim says:

    I handled the Commies in California by moving to Iowa.

  15. Dohtimes says:

    Obama can start by using less tongue, work his way up to learning a new greeting in Spanish other than “Have you ever seen a naked Kenyan?”

    Wood chipper to everything but the junk, napalm the wood chipper and have an open casket funeral.

  16. NoMoBama says:

    Step one: Don’t vote for him, even it it makes you appear raaaaaaacist.

  17. Writer says:

    As far as Obama is concerned-Raul Castro is simply another “Fellow Traveler”. Nothing to see herer.

  18. CaptMidnight says:

    If I’m obama, I take a selfie with a Commie using some blonde chick’s cellphone. As Captain Midnight, I leave an indent from my decoder ring on the Commie’s face.

  19. RAML says:

    Use Desert Eagle. Heavy enough to break temple when used as a hammer,if you can’t afford $4.00 a round. Heavy enough ( 50 cal) to vaporize temple if you can afford it.

  20. Ogrrre says:

    Snapkick to the ‘nads … but only if you are feeling mellow at that moment. If you are not feeling mellow, then a snapkick to the ‘nads is just the start.

  21. Writer says:

    Smack the IRS Agent with a 2X4.

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