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[Space Oddity (ft. Chris Hadfield and Glove and Boots)] (Viewer #117,760)
Movie producer Harvey Weinstein announced that he is making a movie to try to “destroy” the National Rifle Association.
Yeah, good luck with that. Betcha it causes more ammo sales than ticket sales.
[Title reference: there’s no link for this, it’s just my own observation than whenever a bad guy uses the phrase “once and for all” in a movie or TV show, his plan is completely doomed to fail. Just watch for it – you’ll see]
Thanks to the Twitter account @Amazing_Maps, we now have an idea of how the Internet stereotypes all 50 U.S. states. When a search phrase like “Why is Illinois so…” is typed into Google, the search engine autocompletes the sentence with the word that people most commonly write in the search bar next. In this way, Google autocomplete may reveal the deeply held assumptions the public holds about a state.
Actually, if I’m not mistaken about Google’s algorithm, search results become increasingly tailored to the user over time, so this may say at least as much about the user as it does about the search engine.
For example, I got “Why is Wisconsin so cold” as my #1 result. “Liberal” was second.
Anyway, for the record, since I literally wrote the book on state stereotypes, I can state authoritatively that most of this map’s stereotypes are wrong, and most Google users ask stupid questions.
[Think you have a link that’s IMAO-worthy? Send it to email@example.com. If I use your link, you will receive High Praise! (assuming you remember to put your name in the email)]
*courtroom goes silent as the judge slams gavel repeatedly* oh, carry on guys. just putting this desk together.
— chuuch (@ch000ch) January 30, 2014
Great news! Discovery Channel picked up my series, where I fly around the world blowing bong hits into dangerous animal's faces.
— Matt Fernandez (@FattMernandez) January 30, 2014
Ladies call me decaf because nobody wants me but they'll take me if there's nothing else. Also there's no real purpose for my existence.
— Mike Bianchi (@Mike_Bianchi) January 30, 2014
No one loves animals more than me. If I see a cat cough up a hairball, I make sure to put it back in
— sweaty five dollars (@iscoff) January 30, 2014
why am i the only one who remembers the mentos ad where they burn the cross on the lawn and then they show the mentos and everything's okay
— john freiler (@johnfreiler) January 31, 2014
One more question, Mr. President. If Mario was invincible and he petted a dog, would it kill the dog?
— Sean Thomason (@TheThomason) January 31, 2014
Bill Ayers. Nothing sadder than a revolutionary on a pension. You never saw Emiliano Zapata at a CVS counter arguing about an EDD co-pay.
— Dennis Miller Show (@DennisDMZ) January 31, 2014
A new study shows that comedians have high levels of psychotic personality traits.
So, if I ever get sick of IMAO, apparently President of North Korea is always a career option.
Bipartisanship — not for its own sake but to solve problems — that’s what our constituents, the American people, need from us right now. All of us then have a choice to make. We have to choose whether we’re going to be politicians first or partners for progress; whether we’re going to put success at the polls ahead of the lasting success we can achieve together for America.
BARACK OBAMA, remarks to GOP House Issues Conference, Jan. 29, 2010
“Two words – polls, baby!”
Anonymiss of Nuking Politics picked her favorite punchlines to “Scientists Say Earth’s Magnetic Field Is Collapsing. The Solution…”
Click here to see if you made the cut.
If you did, you should probably email Keln about becoming a guest blogger there.
If you didn’t, Anonymiss has got another straight line for you to practice on.
Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.
DHS plans to X-ray all food and drink at the Super Bowl. Other preparations…