Now they’re making cheap Chinese monkeys

Posted on January 31, 2014 9:00 am

The twin cynomolgus monkeys bornRemember years ago when stuff made in China was considered cheap crap?

Of course, then, China was what we now call Taiwan. And what we now call China was called Red China. I never was clear which China was making the cheap crap. I figured it didn’t matter because anything made outside the US was probably cheap crap. I was only 6 or 8 or something, so I could have been wrong. Probably not, though.

Anyway, I still think a lot of cheap Chinese crap is cheap Chinese crap. Back then, we bought the stuff because it was cheap (price). And, we complained about it because it was cheap (quality). Today, we buy the stuff because it is cheap (price), but we don’t complain as much because we’ve lowered the bar. Witness: Obama was reelected; you don’t get a lower bar than that.

So, what brought this up? Well, the Chinese have developed a way cut and paste DNA to genetically alter things in the lab. And, they’ve made monkeys using this process. Which means, we’ll soon be overrun with cheap Chinese monkeys.

On the other hand, they might not be generally available. Cheap clone monkeys? I’m thinking MSNBC might buy them all. That way, they’ll have an endless supply of anchors for their shows.

Send to Kindle
1 Star (Hated it)2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (Awesome) (6 votes, average: 5.00 out of 5)


15 Responses to “Now they’re making cheap Chinese monkeys”

  1. CCO says:

    You remember the scene from Back to the Future when Doc Brown told Marty that it was no wonder the DeLorean had trouble–it was full of Japanese parts! I don’t think the Chinese manufacturers have turned that corner, but I could be wrong.

    On the other hand, the Chinese have an aircraft carrier that they are getting to work.

  2. Chip says:

    No, MSNBC won’t use them as anchors. What they will do is buy all of them, put them all at keyboards and hope they get lucky with the story writing.

  3. Burt says:

    Does FramkJ know about this development? He is going to freak out. He feels about monkeys the way Harvey does about the Irish.

  4. Basil says:

    I understand what you’re saying. But… I kinda think Harvey would deal with a drunk Irish chick a little different than Frank would deal with a drunk female monkey.

  5. DamnCat says:

    Monkeys are inherently very good at flinging poo. But taking over for MSNBC hosts? Those are some mighty big poos to fill.

  6. Harvey says:

    @4 – I think Frank and I would both be laughing at the clumsy way she applied her lipstick

  7. AwesometificAmerican says:

    So now we will have cheap crap that can fling cheap crap?

  8. Jimmy says:

    Why isn’t anyone blaming Nixon for this? Only Nixon could go to China.

  9. Jimmy says:

    Speaking of Chinese crap:

  10. blarg says:

    we used to buy cheap Chinese crap because for some things, it just didn’t matter…and when it DID matter we’d buy the expensive thing.

    Now, we buy Chinese crap because not only is it the only thing that companies can afford to manufacture and still turn enough profit to stay in business, but because it’s all we can afford.

  11. Bunkerhillbilly says:

    1) Is Scary Evil Monkey an early beta-test?

    2) Is JANEANE GAROFALO a laboratory generated offshoot of SEM?

  12. hatless in hattiesburg says:

    meh, don’t worry about the comm-monkeys themselves – worry about the kids getting lead poisoning from the fur and fingers that fell off.

  13. Jimmy says:

    @11: That be come kind of bunker mentality.

  14. Burt says:

    The Chinese won’t get it right. They even make their checkers spherical. and their checkerboards look like the star of David.

  15. Doug says:

    @9 Is that what that Chinese sub fired ICBM 13 miles off the coast from Los Angeles was about?

Leave a Reply

XHTML: You can use these tags: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <s> <strike> <strong>