Straight Line of the Day: What Performance of 2013 Should Win An Oscar?

Posted on January 20, 2014 12:00 pm

Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.

What performance of 2013 should win an Oscar?

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26 Responses to “Straight Line of the Day: What Performance of 2013 Should Win An Oscar?”

  1. Conservatarian says:

    “If you like your plan you can keep it.”

  2. Jimmy says:

    “At this point, what differences does it make?!”

  3. CCO says:

    #1 isn’t eligible for 2013 having been played in a prior year; therefore, it’s #2.

  4. Harvey says:

    Wait… was I supposed to treat today like an actual holiday & not post a Straight Line?

    Oh well.

    So, my answer is: Joe Biden as Rutger Hauer in “Hobo With a Shotgun”

  5. walruskkkch says:

    What performance of 2013 should win an Oscar?

    When it comes to Oscar’s I always vote against the hetreosexual.

  6. Jimmy says:

    Off topic: Holiday? Every day is a holiday now… from our Constitution.

    Just remember, MLK was a Republican before LBJ conned him into being a Democrat.

    LBJ: a big piece of mostly forgotten criminal work for the history books.

  7. Burt says:

    For Wardrobe the best!! goes to Wendy Davis for the “rouge-red” pair of running shoes. Mizuno, “The Wave Rider”.
    These easily eclipsed those tired old Ruby Red Slippers of Dorothy’s.

  8. FormerHostage says:

    The entire crew at MSNBC’s performance of “Bizzaro World”

  9. FormerHostage says:

    Barack Obama as his portrayal of a doctor in “Sign up Now.”

  10. Burt says:

    Best Musical Score goes to Chris Christy for bringing back the Simon and Garfunkle hit of “Bridge over Troubled Water”

  11. Burt says:

    Best Supporting role goes to Ethan Krupp for his brilliant portrayal of ‘pajama boy’.

  12. Burt says:

    Best Cinematography goes to Barack Obama for “Selfies at a Funeral”.

  13. dixiedan says:

    An Arizona Senator in the role of a Republican.

  14. Jimmy says:

    John Kerry for his role as Neville Chamberlain in “Give Peace A Chance.”

  15. Writer says:

    For Best Comedy:
    Barack Hussain Osama as Der Fuhrer.

  16. zzyzx says:

    Joe Biden for his role as funniest comedic sidekick in an on going political drama. “Thank you ladies and gentlemen, thank you, I’ll be here until 2016.” ~ Joe the Veep, here ’till 2016.

  17. Bob in Feenicks says:

    …”I, Barack Hussein Obama, do solemnly swear that I will faithfully execute the Office of President of the United States, and will to the best of my Ability, preserve, protect and defend the Constitution of the United States. So help me God.”
    -January 20, 2013

  18. Bob B says:

    Best Big Picture – the NSA, for “I Know What You Did Last Summer (and last Wednesday)”
    Best Make-up Effect – Harry Reid’s cosmetologist for “getting such a life-like appearance from a soulless cadaver”
    Best CGI Effect – The ACA for best simulation of a functional website
    and a special lifetime achievement award to Elizabeth Warren, for her portrayal of a Native American

  19. TerribleTroy says:

    Best interpretive Performance Oscar……The Sign Language guy at Mandela’s Funeral….

  20. Steve H says:

    Best Wardrobe goes to Melissa Perry Whatzername for the tampon earrings.

  21. AT says:

    The Oscars came on like a wrecking ball.

  22. Doug says:

    Barack Obama, as President of the United States, for the fifth year in a row!

  23. Gumbeaux says:

    As always, Barry Obama in “Liar Liar.” Nominated but not winning were Joe Biden and Harry Reid in “Dumb and Dumber”, Nancy Pelosi, Sheila Jackson-Lee and Barbara Boxer in “The Witches of Beastwick”, and Barry Obama’s poll numbers in “Skyfall.”

  24. Iowa Jim says:

    Anthony Weiner, hands down (and don’t even think about where those hands are when they’re down), for his amazingly true-to-life performance in “Dumb and Dumber”.

  25. Anonymiss says:

    @18 Cookies to Bob B and @24 Iowa Jim !! :D

  26. CLIFF says:

    Hillary bump & grind dancing in South Africa…too easy….next!

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