Straight Line of the Day: In the Proposed Sequel to Al Gore’s Global Warming Documentary “An Inconvenient Truth”…

Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.

In the proposed sequel to Al Gore’s global warming documentary “An Inconvenient Truth”…

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  1. … the hockey stick fights back.
    … people are asleep before it starts.
    … a crushed-over Harry Reed robot comes back from the future to try and stop him.
    … America votes him off the island.
    … not even a massively popular Disney song that sticks in your head like glue can get people to go see it.
    … Al meets up with the Jetsons, who live in a cardboard box down by the river, due to the irresponsible actions of 20th/21st century conservative Americans.

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  2. …the rising sea threatens a community center so the kids have to save it by holding a breakdancing competition to buy carbon credits. It’s called Inconvenient 2: Electric Boogaloo.

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  3. … Truth lowers a trussed-up Al Gore into a shark tank while saying “I believe you will find this even less convenient, Mr. Gore!” over an intercom (because Truth is never to be found in the same room with him).

    [“An Inconvenient Truth II: DIEogenes!”]

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  4. “He finally explains the 15 years and counting pause in global warming and why none of the so-called models failed to predict or account for it.”

    Actually, Gore is seen onstage across from Giselle Bundchen, both of them seated in club chairs. Smugly, Gore turns to Giselle and says, “this European model predicted global warming and supports my point of view.”

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  5. Explains how massive man made global warming and massive man made global cooling are countering each other so we can’t tell anything is going on. But there IS something going on and it is Dire AND darned right inconvenient. And we only have 6 more months to do something about it before the trend of “everything staying the way it is” becomes irreversible.

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  6. …Gore discovers that there is some strange goings on in his new Malibu mansion, so he places hidden cameras all around the house to capture footage of the creepy events. The twist is that hauntings are caused by carbon emissions. It’s called Inconvenient Activity 2.

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  7. …Algore shows what rising oceans will look like by getting into a hot tub with three chubby hookers – “OK, pretend this is a hockey stick graph and these man-boobs are polar bears and Trixie here can release Gaia’s second chakra and OMG see what global cooling does, it’s man made climate induced shrinkage I tell you, don’t laugh at me girls, have you seen the size of my carbon footprint?”… and on and on and on in An Inconvenient Truth Two (Inches).

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  8. . . . Al Gore reveals that he killed JR.

    . . . the Chicago Cubs win the World Series.

    . . . it is revealed that it is Al Gore’s temperature that is rising, not the earth’s.

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  9. …will discuss rising sea levels from his beach home in Malibu, the coming lack of snow from his chalet in Vail, and future food shortages from his usual reserved table near the buffet at Mr. Chin’s House of Chow.

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  10. …Michael Moore films Al Gore having champagne and cheese fondue with the Koch Brothers(tm) on the back verandah of Stately Koch Brothers(tm) Manor while throwing darts at a poster of George Soros.

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  11. … America twice elects an inexperienced community organizing fool, which relegates truth to being really, really really inconvenient. With the pathetic media covering for the most transparent administration evah, truth is also rendered irrelevant and unnecessary.

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  12. The movie is entirely animated and features Obama as Pinky and Gore as The Brain in their continuing adventures to try and take over the world through executive orders and guilt-infused agit-prop.

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  13. … the Global Warming creates a new Carboniferous Age where Al Gore saves the world by killing off those pesky dinosaurs developing and commits suicide when he realizes that it will all turn to COAL.

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  14. …Al Gore uses Science™ to prove that global warming deniers weigh the same as a duck.

    …we see the heart-warming story of a family of displaced polar bears struggling against all odds to make it in the Big City.

    …the baby seals club YOU!

    …climate-change denial is declard anti-American and a House Committee is set up to investigate these activities.

    …George Washington returns from the dead to chop off Al Gore’s head with an axe, yelling, “Now YOU can’t tell a lie, B!^@h!”

    …yet another of the Gore-acle’s speeches on the dangers of global warming is postponed by a freak snowstorm.

    …Al Gore determines Anonymiss’ oven to be a major source of global warming. He disappears mysteriously, never to be seen again.

    …climate change fanatics vow to hold their breath until the world takes them seriously. Unexplained decrease in emissions solves the probem.

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