Straight Line of the Day: The Weirdest Moment During Kathleen Sebelius’s Resignation Speech…

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The weirdest moment during Kathleen Sebelius’s resignation speech

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42 Comments

  1. … When she barked liked a dog, then looked over her shoulder and cried “Please don’t eat me!”

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  2. …was when she waved her hand at the press while saying “These are not the ‘droids you are looking for.”

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  3. The weirdest moment during Kathleen Sebelius’s resignation speech…

    was when she started foaming at the mouth and fell over backwards.

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  4. The weirdest moment during Kathleen Sebelius’s resignation speech…

    was when she told the President, “Don’t tase me Bro.”

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  5. The weirdest moment during Kathleen Sebelius’s resignation speech…

    was the opening of the third seal.

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  6. The weirdest moment during Kathleen Sebelius’s resignation speech…

    was when she bit the head off a live chicken, such a geek.

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  7. The weirdest moment during Kathleen Sebelius’s resignation speech…

    …was when she started twerking

    …it is revealed she is really a ventriloquist dummy

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  8. The weirdest moment during Kathleen Sebelius’s resignation speech…

    was when she admitted, “Crap, now I gotta get by in the private sector.”

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  9. The weirdest moment during Kathleen Sebelius’s resignation speech…

    was the ever so brief, almost infinitesimal, moment when, after all the blather and stock phrases there came upon her the sudden realization that she would have to actually sign up for this mess causing a small tear to appear on her face.

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  10. …was Obama interrupting to find out if she wanted the red or blue cyanide pill.

    …was when she said that death was a tax, otherwise all Obamacare signees would live forever.

    …was swearing that the death panels were replaced by the new remove everything from the body, leave the cannoli surgery.

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  11. … when she boasted that she would prefer to pay the penalty rather than going thru the enrollment.

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  12. … was when she clicked her Ruby Slippers together and, said, “That’s all for you and your little dog too!

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  13. …was when Joe Biden wandered out with his bathrobe open to get the paper from the lawn.

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  14. …she bragged that she was no longer just a synonym for bilious but now for canker, cancer and cooties.

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  15. . . . came when John Cleese walked in with a cage containing a Norwegian blue parrot, which he claimed was dead, and Sebelius insisted was alive.

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  16. The weirdest moment during Kathleen Sebelius’s resignation speech…

    was the little man standing behind her saying “Sic transit gloria mundi” over and over again.

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  17. …she and Justin Bieber thanked all the Sebelievers by peeing in a mop bucket.

    …she promised Sandra Fluke she would soon get her Frederick’s Of Hollywood lingerie, not (NOT!!!) a coat hanger, free home abortion kit.

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  18. … was when she announced her new job at a liberal think tank by saying “Parting is such sweet Soros.”

    … was when she was joined onstage by Janet Napolitano and Lois Lerner; and the three of them hailed Obama as the Thane of Cawdor.

    (before they realized that Obama has grinders full of women.)

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  19. …was the guy in the holocaust cloak pushing the cart around the Rose Garden calling “Bring out your dead! Bring out your dead!” #awkward

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  20. The weirdest moment during Kathleen Sebelius’s resignation speech…
    It took Obama several tries to get her under the bus.

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