Random Thoughts: Photo ID, Guns, and Climate Change

Posted on May 28, 2014 9:00 am

We need more downward economic mobility. There are many useless people in the upper class who in a more just world should be homeless.

Obama may have good intentions in pursuing the Anti-Life Equation, but like Obamacare, I think it will just makes things worse.

I can’t let this go. I need an explanation of who came up with the hat and why and what was Pharrell thinking when he decided to wear it.

Let’s get rid of all guns. I’ll get rid of mine last, if that’s okay.

I hope no one is proposing you need a photo ID to buy a gun because we all know the racist implications of that.

A great way to get rid of all guns would be to rename them. Now there are no more guns in the world. Lots of nugs, though.

Michael Bay makes movies so he can earn enough money to fund his time machine program so he can literally go back and destroy our childhoods.

The tradition with mass shootings is to relieve anger by yelling at guns for a week or two afterward.

If misogyny is the problem, shouldn’t there have been more mass shootings during the Mad Men era? Are we actually worse than we used to be?

Have we tried taxing poverty?

“It’s bad science unless it reinforces what I already believe.” -everyone

What if the climate is changing into something better? Why does everyone have to get in the way of change?

Obama ran on change, then he was like, “I don’t like climate change!” Stop being so incoherent.

Let’s all make long lists of things we don’t like and say those are the cause of mass shootings. I’ll start: Clamshell packaging.

Got the kids tonight. Anyone know where I can Google to find what kids eat?

Seen people talking about this new show CSI: Normative.

Tried to go back in time and kill Hitler, but I accidentally killed this guy called Archduke Ferdinand. Did that affect history?

I got a great idea for a new Disney movie unless they’ve already done one about a guy being turned into a llama.

My favorite white privilege is slathering mayo on everything.

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14 Responses to “Random Thoughts: Photo ID, Guns, and Climate Change”

  1. DamnCat says:

    Let’s all make long lists of things we don’t like and say those are the cause of mass shootings.

    Rain

    Anyone know where I can Google to find what kids eat?

    Tuna! Everyone loves tuna!

    They should make a Disney movie about me. Might have to clean it up a bit for the kiddies though. Unless they’ve already done it.

  2. Larry E says:

    “My favorite white privilege is slathering mayo on everything.”
    Me, too! Every year I celebrate Sinko de Mayo by filling an entire sink full of mayo and eating it all day long.

  3. Jimmy says:

    Years ago, I asked my 10 year-old son what he wanted for dinner. He said, “Food. Good food.” A few years ago, I asked him what he was doing flying in Afghanistan and he said, “Killing Hodgies.” Coincidence?

  4. Les says:

    (test from another machine to see if comment will post)

    The major cause of mass shootings is sealed, unopenable pistachio shells.

  5. blarg says:

    I blame the rampage on sex-access inequality and nerd discrimination. It happened as a result of a nerd acting out because he couldn’t get hot girls to have sex with him due to discrimination. It’s time we took on this serious issue of sex-access inequality. We need to demand a law from our elected officials to criminalize sexual rejection. If only there were laws to force women to have sex with anyone who demands the sex that is their birthright to have these tragedies could be avoided. This right is clearly spelled out in the Constitution’s equal protection clause and it’s about time we deal with this institutionalized form of discrimination. Demand equal access to sex now!

  6. blarg says:

    You can’t blame the nerd rampage on guns – although it’s a FACT: and Settled Science (TM) that guns routinely spontaneously kill people on their own for no apparent reason, it is very unusual for guns to do this by stabbing their victims or running them over in cars. Something else is at play here. A new Republican technology funded by the NRA and the Koch brothers that makes guns even deadlier? According to scientific studies using science and performed by people with labcoats who look intensely at things while their picture is taken, yes.

  7. Steve H says:

    I use deli mustard that has little brown spotted things in it. (Coincidentally, I also have freckles.) (Always have, so don’t worry, the rest of you…)
    Should I wallow in my yellowish brown privilege now?
    Should I add “furry” to that, since I have a beard?

  8. CCO says:

    I think Habakkuk addressed the issue of the unjust rich; maybe Amos too.

    I think the Roman Empire was the last to tax poverty. Note that Henry VIII did not tax poverty; he merely had “forced loans” (no really).

  9. DamnCat says:

    Am I the only one who thinks Steve H. looks like Grumpy Cat?

  10. Jimmy says:

    Well, I don’t know about that, DamnCat, but I think Steve H. looks like he’s about to punch some hippies! Afterwards, he’ll read them the philosophical riot act, consistent with “punch first, explain later.”

  11. Chuck says:

    “Tried to go back in time and kill Hitler, but I accidentally killed this guy called Archduke Ferdinand. Did that affect history?”

    You overshot Adolf a bit there.

  12. c64wood says:

    My favorite white privilege is drinking a can of Schlitz Malt Liquor through a straw and enjoying a Newport.

  13. CCO says:

    “Tried to go back in time and kill Hitler, but I accidentally killed this guy called Archduke Ferdinand. Did that affect history?”

    Classic example of this trope:
    http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/HitlersTimeTravelExemptionAct

  14. GrandLarsenE says:

    My favorite white privelege is the right to refuse to eat anything with mayo on it.

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