Straight Line of the Day: Gas Prices Are at a 6 Year High. Obama’s Solution…

Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.

Gas prices are at a 6 year high. Obama’s solution…

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  1. …is to raise the minimum wage so working families don’t have to choose between health insurance and gas. That doesn’t work since health insurance is mandatory. Okay, between birth control and gas. That doesn’t work either since birth control is free. Um, between food and gas. Well, you can get an EBT card… Oh never mind!

    …go play golf

    …wag the dog (before eating it)


  2. … was to have Global Warming ™ scientists go back and “adjust” the raw data so that it appears that gas prices are at an all-time low.

    (Really…. They do that with thermometer readings, you know.)


  3. … is to replace diesel power with D-cell power. Next?
    Oh, you can’t afford that many D-batteries? Declare access to D-cells a “fundamental right.”

    … was to have the NSA track the driving habits of all Americans,
    the Justice Department monitor the phones of all reporters who cover this story,
    the FTC sue gas stations that raised their prices when the government raised its taxes,
    the IRS audit any group that organizes to protest,
    the MSM call it a phony crisis,
    the EPA conduct on-site investigatons,
    National Parks to close, to save gas,
    and — geez,nit’s scary how easy it is to think like Obama!


  4. …payment options are now Cash, Grass or Just Ask Nicely.

    …Keystone pipeline workers get go-ahead, paid with Viagra.

    …shorten the roads = lessening the mileage.

    …double deck the buses he throws people under.



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