Straight Line of the Day: The Most Interesting Feature of President Obama’s New California Mansion…

Posted on July 23, 2014 12:00 pm

Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.

The most interesting feature of President Obama’s new California mansion

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49 Responses to “Straight Line of the Day: The Most Interesting Feature of President Obama’s New California Mansion…”

  1. Jimmy says:

    …the rooms are padded.

  2. Jimmy says:

    …is it’s a Faraday Cage.

  3. Jimmy says:

    …is that the doors don’t open from the inside.

  4. Bob B says:

    …is the high-speed rail system that Governor Brown is having installed as a “proof-of-concept”.

  5. Jimmy says:

    …is that it comes with a full staff of psychiatric nurses.

  6. can of spam says:

    … it has walls and gates to keep uninvited people out. What a novel concept…

  7. can of spam says:

    … is that he didn’t build that.

  8. can of spam says:

    … is that it, too, appears to be used to house rockets for Hamas to fire at Israel.

  9. CCO says:

    is the RTG array in the basement.

  10. Apostic says:

    … kitchen service door next to a door to a dog kennel.

  11. can of spam says:

    @10: It has a puppy mill. And I mean “mill”.

  12. can of spam says:

    … that like much of California housing, it will be used to shelter an illegal immigrant.

  13. CCO says:

    (And everybody give it up for #6 by Can of Spam!)

  14. can of spam says:

    @13: Thank you, I’ll be here all week. Try the veal, and don’t forget to tip your waitress!

  15. Steve H says:

    @6,7,11,12 – Yo, Spammie, today you rock!

    (And since nobody else around here is giving out cookies anymore I will take it upon myself to award you with the high-carb non-diet non-Trader-Joes treat of your choice and the adoration of moon-nuking conservaminions everywhere.)

  16. jw says:

    the “Glenn Reynolds Smoothie Cookbook”

  17. cc says:

    I thought Rancho Mirage was the punch line.

  18. Bob B says:

    …is the use of the most transparent set of windows ever!

  19. Oppo says:

    … is its catchy nickname, “The Anti-Western Anti-White House.”

    … is its catchy nickname, “The Islamic CaliPhat Crib.”

  20. Jimmy says:

    …is that the library is built-in. Both books.

  21. walruskkkch says:

    The most interesting feature of President Obama’s new California mansion…

    is the cement pond in the backyard.
    whenever anyone is at the front door a bell rings.
    the fancy eatin’ table with holes for yer drinks.

  22. walruskkkch says:

    The most interesting feature of President Obama’s new California mansion…

    he managed to get it for free!

  23. Oppo says:

    … is the fully-stocked whine cellar.

  24. walruskkkch says:

    The most interesting feature of President Obama’s new California mansion…

    it is built on the Bush’s fault line.

  25. walruskkkch says:

    The most interesting feature of President Obama’s new California mansion…

    he had to ask Hillary for an affordable mortgage.

  26. walruskkkch says:

    The most interesting feature of President Obama’s new California mansion…

    he’s the only black family in the neighborhood.

  27. can of spam says:

    @15: I always rock. I just don’t always rock here.

  28. lilo says:

    It’s not in (insert your state name here).

  29. Jimmy says:

    @23 Oppo: But instead of a “wine cellar,” there’s a choom cellar. Only the finest kind.

  30. Gumbeaux says:

    The alligators in the moat only work 29 hours a week.

    It is powered by leftover Solyndra solar panels.

    He bought it using the Homes For Clunker Families Executive Order.

  31. Bob B says:

    …is that it is staffed entirely by “undocumented immigrants”, all named Juan or Juanita, so that Obama doesn’t need a teleprompter to get their names right.

  32. Burt says:

    …is the dedicated tunnel system which heads south and is labeled “servant’s entrance’ but is also used for importing necessities.

  33. Burt says:

    …none of the staff has health insurance.

  34. HokieGomer says:

    …is the Snoop Dog Suite.

  35. Oppo says:

    … is that the in-law apartment was converted to an “executive order” apartment.

  36. Oppo says:

    … is that it’s so far away from his beloved former “Cominskey” Park and his skeet-shooting range.

  37. Oppo says:

    … is that the city of New London, Connecticut, wants to seize it to give to a mall developer, and Supreme Court precedent says there’s nothing Obama can do about it.

    (It’s OK, though, because in California a Kelo doesn’t go far.)

  38. NO_MO_BAMA says:

    It’s going to look something like THIS

  39. DamnCat says:

    …is guest mud hut out back for when family visits.

  40. Hmmm says:

    is that it has 8 bathrooms which is important for a guy that is so full of sh!t.

  41. Iowa Jim says:

    . . . is the map of the USA in the foyer, done in ceramic tile, showing all fifty-seven states.

  42. Jimmy says:

    …is that the spice cabinet has exactly 11 different herbs and spices.

  43. Jimmy says:

    @39: Yes, but with color TV’s with broken channel knobs.

  44. ScottB says:

    The walls and ceilings? All mirrors.

  45. Oppo says:

    … is its Secret Service code name, “Grade C Mansion.”

    … is its Secret Service code name, “Stately Whine Manor.”

  46. Dohtimes says:

    …is the fencing being removed in favor of human shields.

    …will be the daily smug alerts during the weather report.

    …is the narrow, the very narrow doorway to what will be Obama’s office.

    …is the man cave in the basement where Reggie Love will be chained up.

    …is the rad phone with a direct link to Nation of Islam headquarters.

    …there will be two master bedrooms and a Clarence Williams III bedroom for guests.

  47. Writer says:

    … is the Video Room playing Obama speeches twenty-four seven.

  48. CLIFF says:

    ….it has the biggest Gay Bathouse west of the Mississippi (courtesy of Guiness Book)

  49. tandm3 says:

    You can check out anytime you like, but you can never leave..

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