The Illustrated Frank J: I Forget – Did Republicans Even Mention This in ’92 Other Than As a Statistical Curiosity?

[reference link]


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Or Maybe the Problem Was That Hillary Was a Horrible Person Who Did Horrible Things and Lost Support Because Voters Don’t Like Horrible People

John Podesta, chairman of Hillary Clinton’s failed presidential campaign, said Russia released the hacked DNC emails because they wanted Donald Trump as their “lap dog” in the White House.

Interesting theory. Better theory: Podesta’s last blackmail payment check to the Russians to keep them from releasing the emails bounced.

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Mad Dog Mattis Has a Vision

[High Praise! to Freedom Is Just Another Word]

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Link of the Day: Samaritans Not As Good As They Used to Be

[High Praise! to Gang Aft Agley]

Why Israel Matters?

[Think you have a link that’s IMAO-worthy? Send it to If I use your link, you will receive High Praise! (assuming you remember to put your name in the email)]

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I Hate Illinois Nazis

The University of Wisconsin Madison is offering a class called “The Problem of Whiteness” which aims to “understand how whiteness is socially constructed and experienced in order to help dismantle white supremacy.”

That should help clear things up. In Wisconsin, people think white supremacists wear Nazi uniforms and chase the Blues Brothers around in a Ford Pinto Wagon.

[title reference link]

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10 Trump Inauguration Invitees

I heard liberals are upset because a marching band from a historically black college will play at Trump’s inauguration.

I wonder what else will spoil their day?

I speculate thusly:

A plump, juicy puppy, no longer afraid to go near the White House.

A plump, juicy puppy, no longer afraid to go near the White House.

1) A Fort Marcy Park ranger.

2) The same 4 women Trump held that presser with, debuting their new barbershop quartet, The Non-Consensuals.

3) 100 bakers who don’t mind making your gay wedding cake, so you can leave that poor Christian baker alone.

4) A guy who admits that, although he watched the “Dukes of Hazzard” because the roof of the General Lee was a racist dogwhistle, he mostly watched it because of Daisy’s shorts.

5) A woman who wasn’t comfortable voting for Hillary because she could never remember if it was spelled with one “l” or two.

6) Not one single hot dog cart offering arugula as a topping.

7) $10 buys your name on a brick. You KNOW where you’ll need to go to visit it afterward.

8) A very twisty hedge-maze called the “Crooked Hillary”. At the center is an unsecured email server.

9) Betting station: Trump’s Hair vs. Unbreakable Comb

10) Russian hackers collecting their secret paychecks.

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Straight Line of the Day: McDonald’s Is Opening a Restaurant in the Vatican. On the Menu…

Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.

McDonald’s is opening a restaurant in the Vatican. On the menu…

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“Give Some Vodka to a Dancing Bear, Live Communism Under Vladimir”

Russians are debating how to mark the 100th anniversary of their 1917 Communist Revolution.

I’m thinking a special Russian Language sequel to the video “Dumb Ways to Die

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Random Thoughts: Entering the Year of Trump

My wife remembers seeing the Sinbad genie movie in the early 90s and got angry when I told her it doesn’t exist.

Working from home, I now know why there are office that let you bring your dog but not ones that let you bring your cat.

I’ve heard some alarming reports that Donald Trump is close to obtaining nuclear weapons.

Half the movies you enjoyed as a kids never actually existed.

Weird. Some people remember as a kid seeing a version of Die Hard that wasn’t a Christmas movie.

Helped my mom get on Twitter so she could follow what Trump is up to.

The problem with the arguments that Die Hard isn’t a Christmas movie is that they make you bad and wrong.

There’s a big difference between Christmas movies – like Die Hard – and movies just set during Christmas – like Die Hard 2.

“Be careful of the woods, my child. They are filled with clowns and Hillary Clinton.”

Is there a final Santa Clause movie where someone murders Tim Allen and has to take his place?

I’m pretty convinced that white-gold/blue-black dress has something to do with that alternate universe Sinbad genie movie.

Hidden Figures was really good. Great and inspiring story. Interesting juxtaposition of “this hasn’t been done before” of breaking gender/race barriers and getting men into space.

The 80s were so authoritarian. Remember “Skate or Die”? Now you have the freedom not to skate.

I’d rather have a terrible president everyone admits is terrible than a terrible president most of the media props up as smart and good.

I don’t get why anyone wants a state in the Middle East. Terrible neighborhood. Don’t see it gentrifying any time soon.

If you want to hack an election, can download election hacking code from GitHub. Can only swing election to major party, though.

At least we don’t have to worry about a new Cold War since we’re going to have a president who LOVES Russia.

If I’m ever a rockstar, I’m going to drink Rockstar energy drink for energy for rocking. I’ll also do similar if I’m turned into a monster.

I was thinking of telling my wife she looked pretty today, but I saw what happened with Steve Martin and his Carrie Fisher tweet.

#NeverTrump had little to no effect on voting, putting them on the same footing as Hollywood celebrities and the entirety of the MSM.

We have a bunch of weird dishonest pundits commenting on weird dishonest politicians.

Hey. A new article on why Trump is bad. This could change everything.

Are there any crazy schemes left to try and stop Trump? Petition John Roberts not to swear him in?
Quickly amend Constitution with a “no Trumps” clause?
Have Obama surrender country to Canada so they get to appoint our leader?
It was just cute watching people earnestly cling their hopes to idiotic ideas and it’s better than mass depression.

Don’t get yelling “Allahu akbar!” and killing people. “God is great!” seems like something you should yell before throwing out free candy.
“Ooh! Free candy! God really is great!”

What if Bernie had lost to Trump? We’d now have smug Hillary people saying how she’d have easily won. We’re not the worst timeline.

Kubo and the Two Strings was really good (and really beautiful). Shame it didn’t seem to find an audience.

Going to constantly hear about Trump for all the foreseeable future. Don’t know what Greatest Generation went through, but it wasn’t that.

The iOS version has poor controls and less features, but when you’re bored on a rainy day, you know what they say: “Any port in a storm.”

No one I know voted for Trump. Or for Hillary. I’m very lonely.

Trump seems like the villain from a little kid’s cartoon – bumbling and loud mouthed, not threatening. He’d be a good member of Team Rocket.
“Team Rocket has taken over the White House! We have to stop them before they steal Pikachu!”
But what does this make Hillary? Who is outwitted by Team Rocket?

The ethics committee should disband. There hasn’t been any ethics in Congress for years, so what’s its purpose?

I don’t think I could be president because I wouldn’t be able to help myself from punching most foreign leaders if I got close to them.
Or maybe I should be president.

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