President Obama said the US needs to “respond” to Russian cyberattacks – “and we will”.
We elected Trump. I think we already did.
[High Praise! to Mental Floss]
13 Items Labeled “American” in Other Countries
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Canada says that so far, only 28 Americans have applied for Trump-related refugee status.
And yet in that same time, 50,000 immigrants have come to America. If we were discussing climate change, they’d say the Trump science is settled.
DETROIT (AP) – Hot on the heels of an announcement by Ford that they will close a plant in Mexico and create jobs here in America, the anti-police protest group Black Lives Matter announced that they, too, will be eschewing Mexico in favor of the US.
BLM spokesman DeRay McKesson, said that, unlike the Ford move, his organization had been planning this “reorganization” for some time.
“With the Clinton & Soros money drying up,” said McKesson, “I thought, you know, maybe we should do like the big corporations. They’re all moving to Mexico, labor’s cheap, it’s not much different than hittin’ the Home Depot parking lot to pick up a truckload of sign-wavers, right?”
“Man, bad move,” he continued. “Turns out that not only does Mexico not care if black men get shot by white cops, they don’t even HAVE white cops. Or black men. They thought I was a Jamaican tourist and kept trying to sell me bootleg Bob Marley CD’s”.
“Anyway,” added McKesson, “we’re gonna focus on the situation at home for a while. Maybe lay low until Trump gets inaugurated and then see if we can make looting great again once Whitey’s in charge.”
“Until then,” he concluded, “I guess it’s back to selling ‘Remember Ferguson’ rubber wristbands on Etsy.”
Works like this: I feed you Moon Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments.
Hot stock market tip! Now that Trump’s been elected, invest in…
During an interview with Oprah, Michelle Obama described Barack as “the parent” and the American public as his “hurt toddler”.
Yes, and Trump is Child Protective Services.